Vernoverse [Archive] - Ozformers Transformers Club of Australia (otca.com.au)

Verno

21st October 2011, 04:55 PM

G1 Razorclaw: could no longer stand idly by and serve another inept leader. Megatron, Galvatron, Shockwave, Soundwave, Starscream, Scorponok� All had had their time at the helm but none had succeeded in destroying the Autobots and winning the War; they seemed more interested in doing each other in. And dissent was not limited to he and his fellow Predacons. Whispers in the ranks, rumours and ripples. Galvatron�s insane ambitions were turning many off, so Razorclaw had to act. It began as merely a splinter group to quietly gauge numbers of support, but the response was overwhelming. Quiet plans began to be formulated. A target was chosen. The Predacons, as a separate fighting force, disconnected from the Decepticons, would soon announce their arrival.

The Autobots stationed on Earth were no match for the Predacon Armada which smashed into the planet, decimated its forces, and then detonated powerful explosives crammed into the Earth�s crust. Billions dead in a single day, and the Predacon faction had arrived! Razorclaw simply smiled when he saw Earth�s debris spattered through the solar system. This was just the beginning.

The Autobots, now fighting the War on two fronts, responded to the new Predacon threat with a new force of their own - the Maximals. Smaller, yet still formidable warriors, whose bodies were created from the new Proto-Matter technology that had been developed (its origins in the Mini-Bot technology). Autobot scientists were making leaps and bounds with the development of new technologies, and it was proving decisive on the battlefield. The Decepticons stagnated in their refusal to develop new Energon-efficient technologies; Galvatron believing their sheer size over their smaller foe would deliver results. Razorclaw would not be so na�ve.

But the Predacons were so far behind in the development. So they did what they did best - smash and grab. A supposed secret Autobot research facility was attacked, and a leading Autobot scientist was kidnapped. Csirac, who had led the Autobot research into TransWarp technology, was taken to a Predacon installation to be �questioned� about his work. The Autobots/Maximals had unsuccessfully tested an early TransWarp engine design, at the cost of many lives, including that of Csirac�s partner. The failure, and her passing, haunted Csirac.

The War continued to rage on the surface. New Predacon Generals proved themselves in battle. Four rose quickly through the ranks. Magmatron - a powerful but young and brash Predacon, and three brothers - Cinder, Seethe and Rampant, whose origins were a blur of myth and hype, but their skills were without question. Magmatron never saw eye to eye with the brothers.

In the final battle for Cybertron, long after the Decepticons had withdrawn from the War, with Shockwave signing an armistice as Leader after Megatron�s death, and with the countdown to a test flight of an Autobot TransWarp ship happening above, Razorclaw was killed on the frontline of combat. The battle had looked to be going exactly as Razorclaw had envisioned, but Magmatron was stretchered out, mortally wounded, and the Autobot ranks were bolstered by the miraculous, darkest-hour-lighting return of four mighty warriors - Ironhide, Silverbolt, Prowl� and Grimlock! This turned the tide. Razorclaw fell, his optics skyward but dark, as the Xelor made the 1st successful test of a TransWarp engine.

With Razorclaw dead and Magmatron possibly too, the Tripredacus Brotherhood took command of the Predacon forces and ordered an immediate ceasefire. The Autobots/Maximals now had at their disposal a weapon of the greatest power, a weapon that could vanquish an enemy before it even existed - the control of Time.

Razorclaw�s Predacons had their rights signed away by the now Tripredacus Council, self-appointed heads of the fledgling Predacon Government. With the Decepticons defunct, and the Autobot name retired, Cyberton�s future would be played out between Maximals and Predacons.

Hursticon

23rd October 2011, 03:24 PM

I'm liking this man, great 'Spotlight' type perspectives of a greater story and conflict; More, more! :D:cool:

LordCyrusOmega

23rd October 2011, 03:53 PM

Verno

23rd October 2011, 04:03 PM

Very nice verno. I did have one question but by the time I finished reading I'd forgotten it.

I remember. I know this is your own take on things and I like what you've done. However didn't the Maximals come to be due to down grading their size to conserve Energon? With this in mind Megatron could steal the Golden Disk in order to collect as much Energon from pre-historic Earth in order to upgrade there size and become bigger and more deadly then the Maximals.

Yeah, the Maximals were basically Mini-Bots I believe, produced with the new Protomatter technology. But in my mind, that gave no explanation for the change in faction name. Wouldn't smaller Autobots still be Autobots? I had to reationalise the name change, so I invisioned the Maximals' creation as a direct result of, and opposition to, the Predacons.

I assume you're refering to BW Megatron stealing the disk?

That's possible, but I figured as long as the smaller Maximal 'bots still held their own on the battlefield against bigger opponents, then size matters not.

Verno

25th October 2011, 10:12 PM

Megalith: was a genius - intelligent, creative, persuasive and cunning. But he was one thing above all others: a Predacon. He saw the capitulation by his Decepticon forefathers, and pandering to the Maximals by his current leaders, as a personal insult. He believed that their race had only one true place - in control of Cybertron and of a great empire. If those in authority refused to act, he saw it as his obligation as a proud Predacon to do so, and seat himself at the throne of command.

Opportunities were sparse for Predacons on this new Cybertron. One that did present itself however, was within the Maximal Command Security Force, whose job is was to protect Cybertron�s interest both on and off world from dangers originating from both on and off world.

As a condition of the Pax Cybertronia, the Predacons were not permitted to have a standing army. As such, any Predacon with identified potential was allowed to apply for the Maximal Military Academy. They could graduate and serve, but only ever ascend so far in the ranks of the Security Force before hitting the glass ceiling no Predacon could break through.

Fully aware of the limited scope of progression, Megalith enlisted nonetheless, studied and graduated with outstanding marks in all fields, but specialised in data analysis. He was headhunted by and subsequently joined the Maximal Security Force, an action that gained him no respect amongst Predacons, but Maximal and Predacon leaders hoped he would be an inspiration for other gifted Predacons to put their talents to good use.

He served without incident, but after years of seeing less experienced Maximals pass him into positions of higher standing, he could no longer put himself through it. Or that�s what he told the Maximals upon his resignation anyway. In truth, he�d spent the years in service learning Maximal processes of intelligence gathering and had found ways of accessing classified information, much higher than his security clearance allowed. He�d accessed information the Predacons would have done anything to see, but he�d done it all without raising a single eyebrow. He�d always been held in a suspicious gaze by some Maximals in the Force, but they couldn�t make anything stick to him.

Megalith had never abandoned his desire of leading the Predacons to domination over their enemy. Years of research and analysis had shaped many plans for the revitalisation of their second class race, but his departure was for one reason only.

However, before he could act on any plans, he was contacted by a representative of the Tripredacus Council, who wished to meet with him. They offered him a position within a Predacon organisation that simply didn�t exist. In all his years of stealing Maximal intelligence, never did he hear a whisper about the outfit. Whatever this organisation was, the Maximals had no idea it even existed.

Work on stealth capabilities, advanced weapons research, recruitment and training of soldiers - all of which pointed to a Predacon uprising in the near future. No wonder all this was done on distant off world Outposts, far from Maximal sensors. But the one thing that interested Megalith the most, and where he requested to be assigned, was the TransWarp research department. He had never been able to crack the Maximal intel on their TransWarp technology, and this, above all else that was illegal under the Pax Cybertronia, was the big one. The Maximals garnering the ability to traverse time and change the outcome of the future was that which prompted the Predacon surrender at the end of the Great War, but if the Predacons also had this capability, then they were back on a level playing field.

Megalith paused his own designs for the moment and threw himself into his work. The TransWarp cells were highly unstable, and research was slow going but progress was being made.

Then one day, it worked.

Stellar cycles of research and testing yielded a successfully tested and stable TransWarp cell. The day of uprising would be soon.

But it never came. The Tripredacus Council refused to act. The weapon to retake power of the universe was in their hand but they refused to wield it. Megalith was astounded at the sheer refusal to move. His own plans suddenly came roaring back into motion.

Taking absence from his work, he returned to Cybertron and sought out a crew - skilled, willing, but ultimately controllable to his own ends, and expendable. He found a loyal second in command, two pilots, a deranged engineer, and, from the dirty underworld of the Gladiatorial Arenas run by Cryotek, some muscle. All of them were ready to throw off the shackles of Maximal oppression, but needed a bit of convincing that it was possible. One small data track would change all their minds.

From the Hall of Cybertronian Antiquities, they stole a relic of Earth origin, an object that had been surrounded with myth for centuries. A Golden Disk. And on this disk, a message.

As their stolen ship, fitted with TransWarp cells, broke orbit, and pursued by incoming Maximal ships, the squawking red robot at the helm turned and said �You better be right about this, Megalith�, which was greeted with the reply �My dear Terrasaur, you will address me as Megatron��

Hursticon

26th October 2011, 11:11 AM

Verno

26th October 2011, 11:44 AM

This is good stuff man, more I say, more! :D
One thing though, should Terrorsaur be known as Terrorsaur at this point?, or do you think it'd be more fitting if he had a number rather than a name or just a different name in general?

Cheers Hursty. Don't worry, I'm purging more of it each day to try and make sense of it all myself.

Yeah, I'm not sure what to do with pre-BW names.

Megalith - Megatron
Dynobot - Dinobot
Taranachus - Tarantulas

I've even changed the Tripredacus Council names because I don't like them having Beasty names.

Cinder - Cicadacon
Rampant - Ram Horn
Seethe - Sea Clamp

I'd like the names to somehow reflect or foreshadow their names in Beast Wars. How I can make Optimus Primal Optimus Primal without making 'Optimus' a rank like Captain will be a tough one.

Why do you think a number for Terrorsaur? Don't Transformers have names?

Hursticon

26th October 2011, 12:42 PM

Cheers Hursty. Don't worry, I'm purging more of it each day to try and make sense of it all myself.

Yeah, I'm not sure what to do with pre-BW names.

Megalith - Megatron
Dynobot - Dinobot
Taranachus - Tarantulas

I've even changed the Tripredacus Council names because I don't like them having Beasty names.

Cinder - Cicadacon
Rampant - Ram Horn
Seethe - Sea Clamp

I'd like the names to somehow reflect or foreshadow their names in Beast Wars. How I can make Optimus Primal Optimus Primal without making 'Optimus' a rank like Captain will be a tough one.

I think it's quite a sound approach in renaming characters in a reflective sense, it seems more fitting/natural. :cool:
Primal would definitely be a hard one, you could use: Simia Pax, Latin term for ape and a reference to G1 Prime's former name?, it could also reflect the Pax Cybertronia. :)

Why do you think a number for Terrorsaur? Don't Transformers have names?

Hmm, I was thinking back to the early Cybertron days of the Autobots and Decepticons and how that rather than names they had numbers assigned to them based on the tasks that they were charged with - I thought this could extend to the pre-Beast Wars era but then that would negate everything that both Prime and Megatron were fighting for... :o
It's probably easier to just ignore the suggestion. :p

Verno

26th October 2011, 03:18 PM

I think it's quite a sound approach in renaming characters in a reflective sense, it seems more fitting/natural. :cool:
Primal would definitely be a hard one, you could use: Simia Pax, Latin term for ape and a reference to G1 Prime's former name?, it could also reflect the Pax Cybertronia. :)

Hmm, I was thinking back to the early Cybertron days of the Autobots and Decepticons and how that rather than names they had numbers assigned to them based on the tasks that they were charged with - I thought this could extend to the pre-Beast Wars era but then that would negate everything that both Prime and Megatron were fighting for... :o
It's probably easier to just ignore the suggestion. :p

The problem with Optimus Primal is that both Megatron and Depth Charge refer to him as Primal, as if they had both had dealings with him before and his name, pre-BW, was Primal.

The problem with making 'Optimus' a rank like Captain is what to do with Optimus Minor. Captain Minor, I don't think so.

Then there is the fact he had 'Black Jack' written on his toys' box, which I imagine could be used like a callsign: Starbuck, Maverick etc, which would be fitting with Primal in some kind of Airforce prior to taking command of the Axalon.

Problems...

Verno

27th October 2011, 07:49 PM

Magmatron: was born to fight. One of the new breed of Predacons, happily taking up arms in a battle that began long before his spark entered the world. He harboured a hunger for combat, a desire admired by ranking Predacon officers, Razorclaw included. But he was not just a robot that ran flailing, blindly, into battle. He had a mind for warfare, for strategy, traits that soon found full use as he took command of his own regiment. He dealt the Autobots and Maximals some telling blows, and soon was leading the entirety of the Predacon forces on Cybertron, with Razorclaw gathering his armada for one final assault to take Cybertron for the Predacons.

Things were progressing well on that final day - the Predacon Armada was larger than any had expected, bolstered by extra combatants still wanting to fight (from the now defunct Decepticons). But things turned, swiftly. Word was received that Razorclaw had been killed, or at least wounded; if so, the leadership of the Predacon Army was now at Magmatron�s command. But before it could be acted upon, Magmatron himself was heavily wounded by what was thought to be Maximal fire. He was carried, drifting in and out of an enraged consciousness, to a Predacon facility. It was a secret bunker, whose residents were working on TransWarp technology, among them, Csirac, an Autobot, who was head of the Autobot research into TransWarp technology, but was kidnapped to help the Predacons with their �enquiries�.

Csirac advised that because of the damage sustained, Magmatron�s spark would have to be moved into a new body. The mistrust of the Autobot�s opinion was evident, but they had little choice. The problem, however, was the access to a new body. The facility had bodies, but they were only works in progress, and designed for more than one spark - a new type of combiner that would hopefully not affect the intelligence of the merged consciousnesses, a problem with previous gestalts. The spark was inserted nonetheless, but the body remained lifeless. Several Predacons blamed Csirac, shooting him, and wounding him mortally.

Sometime later, the optics of the lifeless form flickered, and from the rubble of what was the Predacon research facility, emerged Magmatron, in a new, enormous, combining form. His spark, torn into three, but somehow sustained, pulsed with a new power and desire for war, but the world he�d awoken in was vastly different to the one he�d known.

Verno

28th October 2011, 04:08 PM

Primal: was a Maximal, constructed from new Protomatter technology, and fitted with flight capabilities, he was enlisted into the Maximal Airforce, whose recruits, because of their smaller size, piloted fighters against their larger Decepticon foe. After the Decepticon withdrawal from the war, it was fighter versus fighter with Predacons piloting their own brand of small fighters. Given limited training, and a crash course in the controls of the Maximal ships, the young pilots were sent into the battle. Through several acts of utter madness, all of which successful, during his short training, Primal earned the call sign �Black Jack�, as risk seemed to be part of his arsenal.

His Wing, of which he soon became commander, garnered great respect as their successes amassed. Friends were lost, and Primal took such knocks hard, harder than most, but it drove him on to fight harder, to make sure their sacrifice was not in vain.

His Wing was selected to lead the defence of the Xelor, as it attempted to test in-flight TransWarp engines in, what was to be, the last stages of the Great War. The previous attempt had cost all crew their lives, as the Lexor failed spectacularly. Primal�s fighter was damaged in the battle, and turned in into the path of missiles headed for the Xelor. The ship headed the missiles off, and saved the crew, but at the cost of his own life.

Or so his fellow Maximals thought.

Blowing open the cockpit at the last moment, Primal leapt into space and headed into the path of a Predacon fighter, crashing into it, ejecting its current pilot, and taking control of the enemy fighter reengaged in the battle. His return was greeted with great cheer.

Fighting off waves of Predacon fighters, Primal�s Wing gave the Xelor a chance to test, and test successfully, achieving TransWarp travel.

Below, on Cybetron, the battle turned in the Autobots/Maximals favour, with the death of Razorclaw, and the new Predacon leaders, the Tripredacus Brotherhood, witnessing the TransWarp test, immediately called a ceasefire, and subsequent surrender. The Great War was over.

Primal�s selfless actions and great leadership in the battle, coupled with his miraculous return from apparent death, earned him the new call sign of �Optimus�, which he didn�t care for at first, as he didn�t consider himself worthy, but in time came to adapt it to his name.

In the peace, Optimus Primal lectured at the new Maximal Military Academy, even though he was of limited experience himself, but the skills he did possess were priceless to the new recruits. When the opportunity to Captain an exploration ship arose, Optimus surprised many by applying for the position, as he was seeking a change of pace. With his record of success, and with the secret mission of the Axalon, the Maximal High Council intervened in the selection process and made sure he was selected as Captain. Though it was his first time commanding a crew and ship of this nature, the High Council believed the mission would run smoothly and without incident. It didn�t quite turn out as expected.

Verno

28th October 2011, 04:55 PM

Terminator: was a Predacon, a flier, and a silent, cold-blooded killer - cunning and with skills unsurpassed by any, except perhaps Starscream himself. Many saw similarities between the two, but Terminator had no appetite for leadership, just killing on the wing. He piloted a Predacon fighter with incredible touch, and struck fear into the sparks of the Maximals he faced.

Terminator was part of the assault on the Xelor in the penultimate stages of the Great War, but his demise was in shameful circumstances.

He enjoyed tailing his missiles into their targets, and was following two he�d fired at the Xelor, when a Maximal ship intersected them, denying him the kill. To make matters worse, the Maximal pilot had leapt from the ship and into his path, crashing into the cockpit with sword blazing, slashing it open and wounding Terminator, before casting him out into space, and commandeering his ship. He drifted helplessly in space for many cycles, before being drawn back in by Cybertron�s gravity.

The shock and damage of the event scarred Terminator deeply, leaving him a shadow of his former self. The silent, cold-blooded killer was gone, replaced by a bumbling fool, whose skills were nothing on what they once were. To try and prove himself, he volunteered his talents to a young Predacon called Megalith, who was in the market for a pilot for a little job that promised great reward and the return of his reverence. He would receive nothing but more pain.

Hursticon

28th October 2011, 05:04 PM

http://i1032.photobucket.com/albums/a409/Darkone666au/Webpics/cheetorthumb.png

Verno

28th October 2011, 05:37 PM

Glad you approve mate. Ravage will be along shortly.

Verno

28th October 2011, 06:38 PM

Ravage: was a Decepticon. He had always known one thing with certainly - Megatron would be victorious in the Great War. But the attack on the Hub had changed all that. The deaths of Megatron and Soundwave had shaken his beliefs to the core. The only thing he had left was his faction, the Decepticons, but that was soon to be taken away from him too. With the leadership of the Decepticons returning to Shockwave, who declared the withdrawal of their remaining forces from the war, and subsequent ceasing of the faction, Ravage found himself with nothing.

Ravage now had only one goal - survival, through whatever means. An unlikely opportunity presented itself. The Autobot/Maximal leadership secretly approached Ravage, to turn his skills against the Predacons - to turn spy. He agreed, after some persuasion and promise of freedom after the War, and began to collect what information he could.

He entered the Predacon ranks, as many ex-Decepticons had (in order to continue fighting) and was greeted warmly, as befitted his reputation. The Predacon leadership was secure under Razorclaw, who took a liking to Ravage as an old comrade, but the Generals who served under Razorclaw all vied for his favour and respect, none more so than Magmatron and the Tripredacus Brotherhood.

Seethe, of the Brotherhood, contacted Ravage for a secret meeting. It seemed the Brothers were more than just talk. They were planning to off Magmatron to cement their place under Razorclaw, and they were hoping that Ravage could assist them, with the promise of power and place in return. Ravage agreed, and was told they�d be in contact closer to the time.

Ravage reported back to the Autobots about the power struggle between the Generals, but left out the part about the upcoming assassination. Ravage was playing both sides until he knew which outcome would serve his interests the most. The Autobots wanted to exploit the mistrust between the Predacon Generals, and asked Ravage to make an attempt on Razorclaw�s spark if he could, as Ravage now had Razorclaw�s trust. Ravage agreed, and would attempt it when the opportunity arose.

The final battle for Cybertron began, and the Tripredacus Brotherhood told Ravage it was now time, and as Razorclaw was surrounded by lieutenants and an impossible target, he began to stalk Magmatron.

Little did Ravage know that the Tripredacus Brotherhood�s target was higher than second in command - they had other plans in motion to kill Razorclaw, and take command of the entire Predacon Army.

The battle raged, with Ravage in hiding, stalking Magmatron�s movements. He was a leader of great courage, always side by side with his troops on the frontline, not scheming far from the action like the Brotherhood. It reminded him of Megatron, and his respect for Magmatron grew and he began to rethink what he had been asked to do.

But before he could decide either way, Magmatron was cut down by enemy fire. Ravage retreated. He came out of stealth-mode, and his communicators came back online and buzzed with talk, but it was not of Magmatron�s death, but of Razorclaw�s. The Brotherhood had assumed command of the Predacons and had ordered a temporary withdrawal and rearming to regroup forces. Ravage returned to their ranks, and waited.

In the dark sky above, the Xelor completed a successful TransWarp test. The Brotherhood ordered an immediate ceasefire. It signalled the end of the War.

In the trials after the War, the Maximals believed that Ravage was responcible for the death of Razorclaw. Because of his assistance in ending the War, he was granted amnesty and freed.

He returned to the, now, Tripredacus Council, who believed him to have killed Magmatron, and he was rewarded with a new Protomatter body, and he stayed with the Council, to serve them in secret objectives.

Though he was now in a new Predacon body, and had seemingly served the Autobots, Maximals and Predacons, Ravage believed he was still, at his core, a Decepticon.

Verno

30th October 2011, 03:02 PM

Colony Omicron: began its life as a secret Autobot-run Energon mine, excavating the raw form of Energon crystals found to occur naturally on the floor of the planet�s oceans. The Autobots developed specially armoured underwater forms for their workers, not just because of the extreme environment in which they had to work (some distance underwater), but because the raw Energon emitted a deadly radiation, overexposure to which proved deadly to a Transformer, causing a Spark to be extinguished. The work was hard, but it was in the interests of powering an Autobot victory.

After the War, the mine continued as a Maximal commercial operation, as power was required in the effort of rebuilding the ravaged Cybertron. Because of the oceanic nature of the planet (being so different to Cybertron), the idea was put forward to build a Maximal off-world colony on the surface. The proposal met much concern from those higher up, citing security concerns for the remote outpost. It was decided that Imperial Peace Marshals would be posted to the Colony, to police and protect its inhabitants, and this quelled the concerns and the Colony was constructed.

The Colony flourished. Miners came to the surface to enjoy their time off, and spent much of their earnings, bringing good fortune to the merchant colonists, and the Colony in general, as it expanded with the influx of money.

But the Colony had a terrible secret. During the dark stages towards the end of the Great War, a team of Autobot and Maximal scientists made the planet their home, in order to research an incredible phenomenon.

The Energon miners, due to their prolonged exposure to the radiation, and even with the best efforts to negate it, succumbed to disturbing side effects from their work. The progression into madness as their processors were corrupted was common place. The thickened exo-structure thought to protect them wasn�t working. But this is not what brought the scientists. Some miners� Sparks began to show a tolerance to the radiation - the Spark would develop something of a skin, a hard layer that protected the Spark from being extinguished by the exposure, and in some more extreme cases, the Spark began to feed on the radiation, empowering the miner and increasing their strength and abilities to repair themselves.

The scientists postulated that, under the right conditions, a Spark might be able to tolerate all forms of damage, in essence recreating the immortal Spark of the Decepticon Starscream. In such a time, the possibility of immortal soldiers was one that even the ethic-driven Autobots and Maximals could not go past, in the hope they may turn the tide and end the multi-millennia-long War.

Events would unfold at a rapid rate towards the end of the conflict. The Maximals weren�t stupid enough to believe the Predacons would remain peaceful forever, so the research continued, in direct, albeit highly secret, violation of the Pax Cybertronia, with the intent that if the Predacons ever did start the War again, the Maximals would have a weapon to fight it with and quash it quickly.

So beneath the thriving colony of Omicron, under the eye of the Imperial Peace Marshals, within earshot of the drilling rigs, and with the possibility of being the catalyst of throwing their faction back into War, a secret Maximal research facility quietly continued its study and experiments into the realms of the immortal.

But they were not quiet for long.

Verno

30th October 2011, 03:31 PM

Depth Charge: was an Autobot. After the Great War, Depth Charge, like most of his Autobot brethren, underwent the Great Upgrade, into a new Proto-matter body, and was rebranded under the new faction name of Maximal, after the Autobot name was retired.

His dedication to procedure and sense of justice were lovingly mocked by those serving under his command, but he was still greatly respected, as he�d proven himself on countless occasions during the course of the War. He inspired those around him to do better and was a soldier of unwavering loyalty, with a drive towards Peace.

After the signing of the Pax Cybertronia, Depth Charge took up a place with the newly created Imperial Peace Marshals, created to act as a police force and with the unenviable, some said impossible, job of calming tensions between Maximal and Predacon on the street. His admirable service was rewarded with the posting to the idyllic Maximal Colony of Omicron, to head the Marshal presence. However, there was more to his selection than first thought.

The Colony was also home to a research facility, whose activities were outside those agreed upon in the Pax Cybertronia. The story was that the Peace Marshals were to protect the populace from any miners getting too rowdy in their time off from the arduous work beneath the water. But in reality, they were making sure no information slipped out of the Colony about the other activities, which could plunge Cybertron back into War. The research itself wasn�t seen as dangerous, but the guarding against leaks and spies was paramount - and there was only one Maximal with the right background and demeanour for the job.

Hursticon

30th October 2011, 03:53 PM

Oh man! - Brilliant, excellent work man as this is the sort of narrative expansion that the Beast Wars continuity really should have explored! :eek::D

I love how you've given a reason behind the Maximals even wanting to pursue the creation of an Immortal Spark such as Starscream's, there really has been no reason given for this and what you've done is not only given it a reason, but also a killer premise, setting and backdrop. ;):cool:

Man, it would really be awesome if you were able to get these excellent spotlights seen by the mob at IDW or someone; to have them furthered as an ongoing pre-Beast Wars/post-Generation 1/2 comic line - There is SO much great potential here for some engaging Sci-fi story telling that has not been explored before - beyond the usual G1 Reboot every 18 months! ;):)

Verno

30th October 2011, 04:12 PM

Cheers Hursty, I'm glad you're enjoying it, hopefully a few other board members are too, though they're not as vocal. (I bet Gok is hating the fact he's enjoying it, because it's not canon, and he's not allowed to enjoy things that aren't canon :p)

I'd love for IDW to cast an eye over it sometime. Or Furman. Or anyone involved in the comics in some way. I'm writing it for my own enjoyment (and because we don't get anything new BW-wise for a decade at a time), but if someone saw commercial value in it, I'd be beyond thrilled! And with your current appreciation, I could guarantee them at least 1 buyer! :p

You're right about the scope of it all. The 300-odd years between the end of G1 and the start of Beast Wars are a pretty bloody busy 300 years (which is why I hate the time-scale of G1 [4 millions years, pfft, as if...])

I'm just jotting down some ideas on the Great Upgrade right now, then I'll make a start on Rampage. Stay tuned.

Verno

30th October 2011, 04:41 PM

The Great Upgrade: saw the mass adaption of Proto-Matter Technology to the population of Cybertron, Autobot and Decepticon alike. The technology was developed in response to the incredibly inefficient, Energon-guzzling bodies of the Autobots and Decepticons, as Energon was becoming more and more difficult to source. The Mini-Bots were thought to be an early answer, but proved no solution. The Micromasters, a further downsizing, again proved no answer, as it wasn�t simply a matter of reproducing the same technology in a smaller form - it had to start with a new form of technology all together.

A new, malleable, easily reprogrammable technology was created. Metallic, yet fluid in its natural state until a design was chosen, then solidified into the new body for the Transformer. It was a breakthrough for the Autobot and Earth scientists who had worked tirelessly on the project, hoping it would help end the War against the Decepticons.

Brave Autobots underwent the procedure, coming out as smaller, more efficient soldiers. They were lesser in physical strength and firepower of course, which worried many Autobot commanders, (Grimlock among them, who voiced loud concerns about the project), but because they could continue fighting for longer, it was hoped they would match or even surpass their larger Decepticon foe in the long run.

Unfortunately, the technology was stolen by a sub-branch of the Decepticon War machine, the Predacons, under the command of Razorclaw, who saw promise in the technology, where Megatron did not. It was adapted to serve the enemy. Not long after, the Predacons announced themselves to be a separate entity from the Decepticons by destroying Earth, and killing the 8 billion people who lived there.

Up until the end of the Great War, the adaption of this new technology was limited to the Predacons, and the off-world Autobot forces battling this new Predacon threat. They called themselves Maximals - a more bestial name to counter a more bestial opponent.

With the ink still wet on the Pax Cybertronia, transfer centres were built for each faction, to bring the new technology to the populace.

The Maximal Activation and Technological Reformatting Exchange (or The Matrix, for short) and the Predacon Interchange Terminal (or The Pit) were brought online to upgrade Cybertron�s inhabitants.

Verno

31st October 2011, 05:09 PM

His Spark pulsed and the Universe shook.

Protoform X was born to the sound of his own screams, lived in the echo of the terror he created, and died in a glee-filled madness that rattled the Earth. His intelligence, coupled with his limitless power, was a nightmarish combination. He saturated his Spark in the fear he instilled in others, devoured those lesser than himself, and playfully revelled in the pain of those who would attempt to contain him. He corrupted the world around him to mirror his own twisted Spark.

He sought an equal - understanding from another, that would make sense of his shattered, psychotic existence.

RageOnTheRoads

31st October 2011, 11:20 PM

wow Verno that's awesome! The attention to detail is fantastic and it's so well thought through! There is serious potential here!

Love the Protoform X stuff, I always found him an interesting character myself and your little short captured the whole twisted Frankenstein element beautifully. :D

Cool stuff man.

Verno

1st November 2011, 10:12 AM

Verno

1st November 2011, 01:15 PM

Ever wondered how Tarantulas knew so much about the Vok?

In the years during the initial stages of the construction of the Hub, a planet was discovered and selected for cyber-forming. Its primitive inhabitants were to be exterminated, and a taskforce was sent to the planet to begin the operation. As they moved across the planet, advanced structures were found, clearly of alien origin. One was accidently triggered, which set off a signal that raced into the heavens.

The genocide of the planets population continued, but soon an enormous flying base answered the signal. It engaged the Cybertronian forces and easily accounted for them, then began to scan the planet to see what affect the new arrivals had had.

More Empire ships were sent to battle the unknown menace, but found, upon their arrival, more alien bases orbiting the planet, firing high-powered energy beams at the surface, destroying all life and resources that had been present and abundant, including raw forms of Energon.

Once complete, the aliens left without so much as a look towards the small Cybertronian fleet that had amassed; the planet now a barren rock.

The Cybertronian fleet dragged the rock back to the Hub to be analysed, but found absolutely nothing, so it was cyber-formed and added to the Hub. What little information they did have on this new enemy was compiled and research began into who or what these aliens were.

Little did the Cybertronian Empire know, but a base had returned to the original location of the planet to reseed it with life - but it was gone. Thus began a mutual interest: The Cybertronian Empire in the aliens, and the aliens in the Cybertronian Empire.

Hursticon

1st November 2011, 01:54 PM

2 - The research facility was granted 10 new protoforms with Sparks from the Maximal High Council, in the hope they could perfect the process of making a Spark immortal. The first 9 failed, with the Sparks being extinguished, but the 10th, (roman numerals X {get it? Protoform X? [And don't start with me about Earth symbols on Cybertronian things - Depth Charge's Star Hopper in Deep Metal was shown with an '04' on its side, so it happens]}) was successful, to a degree. His Spark was tolerant to many extreme conditions and somewhat 'immortal' but the energon radiation had corrupted his processors, causing psychosis and violence. He escaped, after he learnt that he had 9 brothers that they had killed, 9 equals, whose power he could still feel but could never know. He destroyed the Colony that was built on top of the research facility.

Thoughts?

This! :D:cool:

Also, Ooh! - Prior Contact! :eek:
Deep Classified info, how did Tarantulas get access to that I wonder? ;)

Verno

1st November 2011, 02:00 PM

Deep Classified info, how did Tarantulas get access to that I wonder? ;)

It helps when he and the Tripredacus Council were members of the Cybertronian Empire...

RageOnTheRoads

1st November 2011, 02:32 PM

Thanks ROTR. I've been trying to nut out a good backstory for Rampage for the past couple of days, but I don't know which angle to take.

1 - He was a miner that was driven crazy by the radiation of the raw energon crystals being mined on the planet. He came to the attention of Autobot scientists who noticed abnormalities in his Spark due to the exposure. He was experimented on, but subsequently escaped, and destroyed the Colony built on top of the research facility.

Or

2 - The research facility was granted 10 new protoforms with Sparks from the Maximal High Council, in the hope they could perfect the process of making a Spark immortal. The first 9 failed, with the Sparks being extinguished, but the 10th, (roman numerals X {get it? Protoform X? [And don't start with me about Earth symbols on Cybertronian things - Depth Charge's Star Hopper in Deep Metal was shown with an '04' on its side, so it happens]}) was successful, to a degree. His Spark was tolerant to many extreme conditions and somewhat 'immortal' but the energon radiation had corrupted his processors, causing psychosis and violence. He escaped, after he learnt that he had 9 brothers that they had killed, 9 equals, whose power he could still feel but could never know. He destroyed the Colony that was built on top of the research facility.

Thoughts?

Eh, earthen numbers in the tf mythos never really bothered me. It's not as if they aren't hugely anthropomorphised as it is anyway.

Both are really interesting concepts. The second sets up an interesting interplay, between madness/revenge and loss. There is also an unsettling element of twisted fate, determinism and the cruel nature of the universe (very Nietzsche). It certainly fits the tone of the character nicely and darkens the nature of the Maximals with the whole, 'rampant drive for immortality regardless of moral cost' angle.

The first isn't any less interesting though. It paints a picture of a more narcissistic hell bent quest. It is also kind of disturbing as it has a normal figure being reduced to 'evil'. There are certainly some Jungian archetypes at work in this one. The whole shadow vs the self or Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.

Personally I would go for the second premise. But I love what you've got here and reckon both are really suitable for the character. :D

Verno

1st November 2011, 03:58 PM

Taranachus: was a member of the Cybertronian Empire, and as such, a son of the Liege Maximo - an ancient Transformer, who left Cybertron long ago to see through his own agenda, and whom built an army with the use of the budding reproduction method.

Taranachus was part of an exploration mission, locating viable new worlds to be cyber-formed and added to the Hub. Each crew had with it an analyst, Taranachus in this instance, specialising in the study and detection of the mysterious aliens encountered some many centuries earlier. Little had been learnt of them in that time - only faint traces of their unique energy signature had been detected, but if more could be learnt and subsequently added to the Empire to increase their own strength, then the research and information gathering would be worth it.

Their mission however was endangered when their ship was damaged by a meteorite. They drifted off-course for some time, as all crew had gone into Stasis after the impact. The automatic distress signal had seemingly not caught the attention of the Empire, or was being ignored as the time of their master�s ascension was close at hand, and the Hub was now under attack from a combined Autobot/Decepticon armada.

When the crew came back online, they found that their numbered had lessened, and they were being held captive aboard a space station of some kind.

The technology they were surrounded by was that of a species encountered some decades earlier. They were an advanced race, though peaceful, who attempted to engaged in a futile battle for their planet, which had been identified as suitable, because of its abundant resources, to be added to the Hub. Their people were scattered when the Empire was victorious.

Their captor revealed himself - a scientist, who survived the horrific battle, and had sworn vengeance against their race for destroying his people. He was constructing a weapon, as big as a moon, in which to attack the Hub with directly. It had some years to go until its completion however, but had engines large enough to propel it from being detected by the Empire before it was ready.

The scientist informed the Empire troops that their missing number had been taken away for testing, to identify weaknesses that would help defeat them later on. Sadly, they had not survived the testing process. Due to his commitments with getting the Battle-Moon operation, he turned the continuing testing over to his only companion, the Moon�s computer, which displayed incredible intelligence of its own - a capability the Empire had never identified in this species, the ability to create almost sentient artificial intelligence.

In reality, the Scientist was still a pacifist, and only allowed the testing of the Cybertronians under the urging of the computer, who outlined what advantages could be achieved from the study.

The computer delivered reports to the Scientist of what had been learnt and how many of the crew had now lost their lives in the testing. The Scientist could no longer sit idly by and allow it to continue, even to these creatures that had caused him so much pain. He demanded the testing stop and they be freed. The computer denied his request. It was not in the computer�s programming to deny any of his commands. He tried to take the computer offline manually, but it failed to work. In the end, he smashed a large control panel, which seemed to have the desired effect.

The Scientist raced down to the holding cells and found the four remaining Cybertronians, but they were not as he had left them, not at all. The computer had altered them, reformatted their super-structures. Testing them indeed, but for what? He brought them online and guided them to their ship, which was still being held in a hanger. The Scientist watched them fly away, then turned to deal with the malfunctioning computer.

Back aboard their ship, the four remaining Cybertronians took stock of their new forms. The computer had indeed altered them, arguably improved them. Taranachus, Seethe, Cinder and Rampant felt free of the strict control that was part of their programming. But deep in their Sparks, they knew something different, something dark, something that was gaining strength by the day. Their ship seemingly repaired, they made for the Hub.

But upon their arrival, they found desolation. The Hub had been destroyed. This was not the sign of a successful ascension by their Master, but of failure, and subsequent destruction. Energy readings leaving the Hub were of a Cybertronian type - their cousins, who still resided on Cybertron, had destroyed the Liege Maximo. But instead of a sense of despair at the loss of their lord, they sensed freedom, and opportunity. The three larger Cybertronians now took charge and the dicision was made: Followed the fading energy signatures back to Cybertron - not out of a need for revenge, but out of curiosity for what their future may hold - and because protection from the growing darkness, for the moment, was only to be found behind the Matrix.

Back on the Battle-Moon, the Scientist was thrown into the already smashed control panel by a tentacle-arm protruding from the wall. A voiced boomed from the computer demanding to be obeyed. The scientist could do little but whimper and bow his head. The Moon�s engines had been firing at full thrust, driving it after the signal from the Cybertronian Empire ship. What was found at the end of the signal was beyond the computers� wildest imaginings. The Moon�s central weapon opened, but instead of firing, it began to consume the debris from the detonated Hub. As the elements were processed, power surged through the Moon�s uncompleted frame. It announced to the universe - THE RETURN OF UNICRON!

Verno

1st November 2011, 04:09 PM

Eh, earthen numbers in the tf mythos never really bothered me. It's not as if they aren't hugely anthropomorphised as it is anyway.

I justify it by all their contact with Earth over the years rubbing off on them :p

Both are really interesting concepts. The second sets up an interesting interplay, between madness/revenge and loss. There is also an unsettling element of twisted fate, determinism and the cruel nature of the universe (very Nietzsche). It certainly fits the tone of the character nicely and darkens the nature of the Maximals with the whole, 'rampant drive for immortality regardless of moral cost' angle.

Yeah, faceless men in white coats are scary.

The first isn't any less interesting though. It paints a picture of a more narcissistic hell bent quest. It is also kind of disturbing as it has a normal figure being reduced to 'evil'. There are certainly some Jungian archetypes at work in this one. The whole shadow vs the self or Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.

Nietzsche, Jung, I never thought some of my simple premises would have a psychological analysis put on them :p You need to have a chat to Ode to a Grasshopper, you both seem to be kids of Philosophy.

Personally I would go for the second premise. But I love what you've got here and reckon both are really suitable for the character. :D

I'm leaning towards the 2nd one also. The 1st is more of a 'tragedy', especially if I added a lost love interest, but I don't know if Tragedy quite suits the character in entirity.

It's all looking at what Beast Wars gave us and trying to work backwards to try and make a story that fits and gives us the eventual character(s) we love.

Hursticon

1st November 2011, 06:00 PM

It helps when he and the Tripredacus Council were members of the Cybertronian Empire...

http://i1032.photobucket.com/albums/a409/Darkone666au/Webpics/imagesqtbnANd9GcRKfio3ADON5bfzs7GBr.jpg

Time to get the old Data Retriever looked at again. :o:p

Both are really interesting concepts. The second sets up an interesting interplay, between madness/revenge and loss. There is also an unsettling element of twisted fate, determinism and the cruel nature of the universe (very Nietzsche). It certainly fits the tone of the character nicely and darkens the nature of the Maximals with the whole, 'rampant drive for immortality regardless of moral cost' angle.

Man ROTR, that is an extremely well worded response and I concur with your sentiments completely. ;):cool:

Verno

2nd November 2011, 12:26 AM

Time to get the old Data Retriever looked at again. :o:p

Not canonically, but they are in my universe.

Man ROTR, that is an extremely well worded response and I concur with your sentiments completely. ;):cool:

2 votes for the 2nd one. I'll try and make a go of it tomorrow.

Hursticon

2nd November 2011, 09:33 AM

Not canonically, but they are in my universe.

Ah!, and having just read your posting about Taranachus; it makes all the more sense. :D

2 votes for the 2nd one. I'll try and make a go of it tomorrow.

Don't rush it or force it dude, tackle it when it comes to you. ;):)

Verno

2nd November 2011, 11:26 AM

RageOnTheRoads

2nd November 2011, 12:03 PM

I justify it by all their contact with Earth over the years rubbing off on them :p

That makes sense, especially with the importance the earth war played in their history.

Yeah, faceless men in white coats are scary.

Especially when they come at you with very big needles and such.

Nietzsche, Jung, I never thought some of my simple premises would have a psychological analysis put on them You need to have a chat to Ode to a Grasshopper, you both seem to be kids of Philosophy.

Except that Ode to a Grasshopper actually knows what he is talking about. :p

Man ROTR, that is an extremely well worded response and I concur with your sentiments completely.

Groovy! Thats two for the second one. :cool: Can't wait to see what you come up with Verno. :D

RageOnTheRoads

2nd November 2011, 12:07 PM

I shot IDW an email, to see if they were at all interested in, at the very least, reading some of my stuff, to which I received the simple, one line reply:

"Thanks for this, but Hasbro isn't open to us doing any more Beast Wars comics."

Is not really a BW comic, is it? Which suggests to me they didn't even read it. Oh well...

mmmm, defiantly didn't bother to read it. Guess Hasbro reckons the BW line doesn't have any more earning potential. :(

I am loving it though. The return of Unicron was particularly nice. Keep it coming. :D

Verno

2nd November 2011, 12:26 PM

mmmm, defiantly didn't bother to read it. Guess Hasbro reckons the BW line doesn't have any more earning potential. :(

It makes me a bit sad to be honest, and draws into question Hasbro's motivations for allowing the release of The Gathering and Ascending a few years back. Where they just token efforts to commemorate the 10th Anniversary and flog some crappy repaints?

Furman had already penned the story for Dreamwave, when they were still in operation or whatnot, so if Hasbro told IDW to get hold of a BW story quickly, they were laughing. The drawing certainly tailed off in quality towards the end which was a real shame, and the culminating story line was basically a rehash of some BotCon thing with Shakoract.

Curiouser and curiouser. Maybe I'll have to wait until the 20th Anniversary :( Although that's only another 5 years away :p

-Edit-

Sorry, it seems the differing quality in drawing came from Guido Guidi taking over the duties. Don was on holidays. Damn shame.

RageOnTheRoads

2nd November 2011, 01:18 PM

Where they just token efforts to commemorate the 10th Anniversary and flog some crappy repaints?

This. While I didn't mind ascension and gathering, they weren't anything really special. I was always really disappointed by the lack of BW comics. It never seems to get the love G1 does despite its popularity.

I usually love Guido Guidi's art but that stuff certainly wasn't his best.

Verno

2nd November 2011, 01:29 PM

Paulbot

2nd November 2011, 01:57 PM

I shot IDW an email, to see if they were at all interested in, at the very least, reading some of my stuff, to which I received the simple, one line reply:

"Thanks for this, but Hasbro isn't open to us doing any more Beast Wars comics."

Is not really a BW comic, is it? Which suggests to me they didn't even read it. Oh well...

Remember:

IDW does not accept unsolicited works (artwork, story ideas, etc.) of any kind.

RageOnTheRoads

2nd November 2011, 02:11 PM

And instead of something new and interesting in comics, we're given rehash after rehash of G1. *sigh*

I was thrilled when I heard Don was doing the pencils for them, his pre-BW modes for Magmatron and the like are incredible! Hinting at what they will be, but still clearly Cybertronian. Magic stuff!

I wouldn't mind it, but they insist on focussing on the same characters over and over and over and over... I think that was one of the reasons why Last Stand of the Wreckers was so well received. Finally we got a more in depth focus on some other characters. I would love to see a series that revolves around just the different Autobot and 'Con gestalts or something like that. What its like to be a gestalt, their inter relationships and place in the tfs society laid out, all while battling other tfs monsters etc etc.

If handled by a decent writer the Combaticons could make for some fun stories. They had such a nice history in G1, what with their rebellious/ political prisoner past and such. (A comic where the Stunticons actually get a smidgen of character development would be nice too. I have only been waiting for that since 1987.) There is just so much potential in these guys and instead of getting the rich character development they lend themselves to and deserve we get the likes of Drift (Gah!) and these potentially great characters are relegated to background expendables or baddy of the week. :(:confused:

Almost everything Don does is magic :D I still love ogling his concept sketches in the back of the BW comics.

Verno

2nd November 2011, 03:00 PM

IDW does not accept unsolicited works (artwork, story ideas, etc.) of any kind.

That's a damn shame. How then are new artists and writers meant to crack it into their 'boys club' then? How does someone, like Don for example, get 'solicited' in the first place if you can't submit them work that you've done? It's all a bit odd.

I'm not a big G1 buff by any stretch of the imagination ROTR, but I can understand your frustration. G1 is a HUGE thing of great potential, and instead of broadening it as you suggest, they narrow it on the same guys constantly. It's a terrible shame.

RageOnTheRoads

2nd November 2011, 03:57 PM

That's a damn shame. How then are new artists and writers meant to crack it into their 'boys club' then? How does someone, like Don for example, get 'solicited' in the first place if you can't submit them work that you've done? It's all a bit odd.

TraditionalDanimatio (as he is know on Deviant art) submitted his Ghostbusters series idea to IDW and while they did 'turn down' his idea, they liked the art he submitted with the idea enough to hire him for a Ghostbusters seasonal special comic. Magically, later that year the Ghostbusters ongoing series began with TD as the artist. I know a couple of other artists who also submitted sample pieces of their work and are now working at IDW.

I guess it comes down to the oddity which is the corporate machine. In short they tell you one thing and then expect another. It's probably just a way for them to cover their behinds.

Hursticon

2nd November 2011, 05:01 PM

Whilst the response from IDW is unfavourable, one has to admit though that it is good that they at least gave you a response at all and if one really wanted to speculatively extrapolate it from said response; It's Hasbro that doesn't want to do anything with Beast Wars at the moment, not IDW. ;):)

I too am bewildered as to how one manages to break into the comic scene, I've a good friend who is a truly exceptional comic artist and narrative scribe who has been trying to break into it for almost a decade; alas to no avail beyond 'We'll buy your concept and it's rights for x$', which is normally a minute fragment of the IP's potential value so unfortunately it just seems that unless you're in America it's almost a fruitless exercise. :(
(Hence why most popular Actors, Artists and Musicians leave Australia :o)

What Paulbot has quoted is honestly expected though, because if a company were to adopt said ideas without your involvement, re: financial compensation, you'd be quite within your right to sue them; I kind of expected this response as it sounds almost word for word like that of the policy the WWE (World Wrestling Entertainment) has had for many years with regards to storyline and character idea proposals. :o

Mind you keep up the efforts man as there are a number here who surely appreciates what you're doing, at least 2 of us have made our interests known ;):cool:, once you've got it to a level/amount you're happy with - perhaps you could post your work on an International fansite that isn't as continuitively/cannonicly narrow focussed and see what others abroad think of it? ;):D
(Gotta rustle the feathe... - door locks a bit eh? :p)

Verno

3rd November 2011, 10:45 AM

Dynobot: was a disenfranchised young Predacon. He came into a world where he the failings of his ancestors were reminded to him daily and he was judged by their actions, rather than his own. This constant taunting, coupled with his impulsive and aggressive nature, saw him constantly involved in scuffles with young Maximals.

On one fateful day, he engaged a group of seven Maximals on his own, after he could take no more of their verbal abuses. He refused to take a backwards step in life, as it seemed to be his destiny to fight against the hand the universe had dealt him, and no matter the cost, he would fight against it to the end. He was a powerful combatant, and rendered several of the Maximals offline, but was then struck from behind and rendered offline himself.

He awoke in unfamiliar surrounds. He was greeted by a cloaked stranger, who commended him on his bravery and power, but made mention of his stupidity. Dynobot made to leave but his path was blocked by the stranger, who offered to help train him in combat. Dynobot refused help, made to attack the stranger but was easily overpowered. The stranger dispensed some wisdom about life, then opened the door, letting Dynobot chose his fate. Dynobot knew if he left nothing would change and the universe would continue to look down on him, so he stayed, and thus began his training.

And not just in combat - Cybertronian history, the War, ethics, judgement and philosophy. The stranger was obviously of great age and wisdom, and had fought extensively in the War, but Dynobot couldn�t figure out which side he was on. He asked the stranger who he was, but was never greeted with a straight answer.

As Dynobot�s skills grew, the stranger offered him a chance to test them. Deep in the old parts of the city, tournaments were held, secretly, in the ancient Cybertronian tradition of Gladiatorial Combat! Illegal, of course, but run tightly by the underworld kingpin Cryotek, though no connection could be traced to him.

Dynobot fought, and won. The stranger, however, was betting on the outcomes of the matches without Dynobot�s knowledge.

Dynobot�s training continued, still with no idea who his tutor was, and curiosity got the better of him again. He was given a cryptic answer - that the blade Dynobot was holding was crafted from the shards of a sword that stole a great friend from the stranger. He had sought vengeance, but was devoured by the blinding force of it. Only through mastery of his skills, and of himself, could he avenge his friend and defeat the greatest master of Metallikato Cybertron had ever seen.

Dynobot continued to fight but was soon delivered a crushing defeat. His favouring of the use of a blaster over a sword had cost him dearly. The underworld environment was the prefect place to find a solution. Arms dealing was of course illegal, as was the adaption of weaponry into a Transformers super-structure, but an old arms dealer, orange in colour, provided the stranger with some small, but necessary upgrades for Dynobot, at a �reasonable� price. Dynobot was fitted with optical lasers, so as to free his hands whilst battling and carry both a sword and shield.

His victories continued, seemingly against the odds, as he was now fighting much more fancied opponents. After a bruising encounter, the stranger�s betting was revealed, as the manager of Dynobot�s defeated opponent refused to pay up on the bet. The stranger dragged the matter before Cryotek, who was judge over all transactions in his arena. He ruled in the strangers favour, and stated payment must be made within five solar cycles. The stranger left, but the low-life manager remained to make Cryotek a deal.

In exchange for twice the bet amount, and a stake in his fighter, he asked Cryotek to kill the stranger. Cryotek simply laughed, as he had no interest in his defeated fighter, but told him to make it four times the price and they had a deal, and if he didn�t like it, he was sure the Maximal Security Force would be interested in the low-life�s attempted solicitation of an assassination. The low-life had been royally screwed over. Instead of being in a small debt to the old warrior, he was now in a pile of debt to the Underworld king, who would do more to him than the stranger would have if he�d not paid. But the hit was now out on the stranger.

Cryotek had seen potential in Dynobot, and wished to bring him into his employment. Megatron had used the Gladiatorial events to recruit an army; Cryotek was in a similar business, but to a more capitalistic end. He needed jobs done on occasion that required certain talents, and Dynobot fit the bill. With the stranger out of the way, he could swoop in and take the impressionable young Predacon under his wing.

Cryotek knew the identity of the stranger, it was his business to know these things, and while he was above organising the murder of one who survived the Great War, he wasn�t above orchestrating his discrediting and bringing about his imprisonment.

The plan worked. The stranger was set upon by a group of thugs and he could do little else but defend himself using all means necessary. He took down all the assailants but stopped before killing them. However, several deaths were faked, and the stranger was charged with their murder. His residence was stormed by Maximal Security Forces, and much to Dynobot�s protests, he was told not to engage them. The stranger went peacefully taken away, saying he may have earned his imprisonment, not for this recent action, but for others in his past - a lifetime of offences.

Cryotek stepped in and played the role of the new mentor for the young Predacon. But Dynobot had come under the eye of another - an ambitious Predacon, called Megalith.

As a stolen Predacon ship blasted off from Cybertropolis after a successful theft of a heavily guarded Earth artefact, an enormous billboard on a skyscraper flashed a huge neon sign�

�Carnivac Escapes Custody��

RageOnTheRoads

3rd November 2011, 03:10 PM

�Carnivac Escapes Custody��

This plastered a big Smile across my face. As did this:

- that the blade Dynobot was holding was crafted from the shards of a sword that stole a great friend from the stranger. He had sought vengeance, but was devoured by the blinding force of it. Only through mastery of his skills, and of himself, could he avenge his friend and defeat the greatest master of Metallikato Cybertron had ever seen.

Once again a very nice backstory, well thought out and executed. I think it's your attention to detail that make it all the more appealing for the reader.

Verno

3rd November 2011, 03:18 PM

Had you figured it out by the end? I tried to leave a few little clues in there to point people in the right direction.

The Stranger, the lost friend, the master of Metallikato, the orange arms dealer... All G1, and all neccessary to try and give the story credibility and links to canon.

I've been looking at the BW Wolfang toy and trying to come up with some kind of Cybertronian/Beast form for the reformatted Carnivac, but so far I'm failing miserably.

Verno

3rd November 2011, 04:49 PM

Info 2:

Early Autobot research into TransWarp technology found that instead of the desired pinprick it was theorised that would only be needed to travel through time and space, the crude technology instead cut a gash in the fabric of space/time, leaving open a doorway to the extra-dimensional realm of the Allspark - the very essence of Primus, and of all Transformer life: past, present and future. Speculation suggested that over time the wound would heal, but during the time it was open, one could travel to this dimension. It was never tested; as no one knew what damaged could be rendered to this Well of Being.

Info 3:

The Autobots developed Proto-Matter technology alongside Scientists from Earth, before Earth was blown up by the Predacons and everyone was killed. The Predacons would later steal the specification of this technology and adapt it to their own ends. The technology was hardwired to be Maximal, the new breed of Autobot soldier. The Predacons didn�t have time to go through the programming line by line and remove all traces of Maximal code; instead they devised a program to override it. The Shell Program would dominate the underlying Maximal programming and bring forth a Predacon instead, with all the desirable Predacon tendencies. It would suppress the previous coding, and deliver a Predacon ready for battle.

Hursticon

3rd November 2011, 06:26 PM

Oh man, I'm loving this Verno - Seriously! :eek::D

I have to admit, I had no idea who you were referencing in the story but I knew they were G1; the name Bludgeon certainly came to mind but alas I'm still not versed enough in the various G1 narratives that can be drawn from. :o
(Though this is an issue that is being rectified in an ongoing fashion with the acquisition of more written material :cool:)

Your ability of weaving awesome details, both Canon and Fanon, into an engaging story telling experience is excellent as it really gives you a sense of a lot is happening on Cybertron and that it's reformation is certainly beyond that of just a physical change, but in many ways idealogical also. ;):)

I feel greedy in repeatedly saying this, but: More, more, more! :D

Verno

3rd November 2011, 06:35 PM

Oh man, I'm loving this Verno - Seriously! :eek::D

I have to admit, I had no idea who you were referencing in the story but I knew they were G1; the name Bludgeon certainly came to mind but alas I'm still not versed enough in the various G1 narratives that can be drawn from. :o
(Though this is an issue that is being rectified in an ongoing fashion with the acquisition of more written material :cool:)

Well you were close with Bludgeon, but he was the one who got killed, not the one teaching him.

Your ability of weaving awesome details, both Canon and Fanon, into an engaging story telling experience is excellent as it really gives you a sense of a lot is happening on Cybertron and that it's reformation is certainly beyond that of just a physical change, but in many ways idealogical also. ;):)

I feel greedy in repeatedly saying this, but: More, more, more! :D

Thanks mate. And more you say? See below.

Verno

3rd November 2011, 06:36 PM

Csirac: was an Autobot Scientist, and head of their research into TransWarp technology. They were incredibly close to a stable form of the technology, but the TransWarp cells had never been tested on something as large as a ship, and though Csirac asked for more time, a full test flight was scheduled. Secrecy had to be paramount - as far as the Autobots knew, the Decepticons and/or Predacons had not begun their own research into the field, but would love nothing more than to shoot down a test ship midflight, or steal the technology for themselves.

Csirac�s partner, Venus, who was as beautiful as she was brilliant, volunteered to be part of the test flights crew, much to the angst and worry of Csirac, but she assured him that everything would be fine.

The ship launched successfully, with its accompanying wing of fighters for protection, and made it into orbit. Decepticon fighters were scrambled, but before they could engage the small fleet, the test ship fired up its TransWarp engines, and vanished.

It returned instantaneously with an enormous flash, some distance from where it had just vanished, but it was now a ball of flame in space. Fiery debris rained down on Cybertron.

Csirac had lost his love, and it was entirely his fault.

The War continued, as did the research, though Csirac was no longer the calm figure of patience he was before, now seemingly lost to his thoughts of why, and tormented by an unseen whisper in his ear.

Attempts were made to collect the debris, but some fell into Predacon and Decepticon controlled territories. Important components were missing. The Autobots hoped they had been destroyed in the explosion, but somehow they didn�t think their luck was that good at present.

Some time later, an Autobot/Decepticon Armada was formed to take the fight to the Cybertronian Empire at the Hub. Though security was still watertight at the research facility, the Predacons chose the opportunity to strike. It was a smash and grab mission. They weren�t after information so much, as they basically torched the facility (thankfully the Autobots had backup servers for all their research data), but they killed several scientists until they found who they were looking for - Csirac. He was rendered offline. He dreamt of Venus, who was telling him not to worry, and that they would be together again soon, but he had some work to do first.

He awoke in a makeshift lab, surrounded by stolen equipment. A Predacon entered and introduced himself as Magmatron, then demanded he begin work on creating TransWarp calls - ones that worked or not, it didn�t matter, as long as they could deliver the same kind of explosion. Some of the debris from the ship was produced to help him make a start. A female voice told him to agree to do what they said, so as to keep himself safe. It was Venus� voice, but she was dead, he told himself. Magmatron left Csirac alone in the Lab to get to work.

The voice would return to Csirac when he was drifting in and out of focus as he worked. He was going mad. He told himself it was the guilt of being responsible for the death of his beloved that was haunting him. Csirac didn�t wish to die, so he did as the Predacons demanded, but he couldn�t face the guilt and go on alone. He began work on a machine. The voice urged him on carefully.

The Predacons monitored his progress, but as they knew nothing of the technology, they didn�t doubt his methods. But all he seemed to have created was a table with arms.

One day, Csirac�s presence was demanded outside of the Lab, there he was greeted by the enormous form of Razorclaw. And he had a job for him. The adoption of Proto-Matter bodies was clearly the way of the future. Razorclaw demanded a new body, a combining body. Two of his original Predacon comrades had long since been killed, and since then the figure of Predaking had not been seen on the battlefield. Razorclaw demanded a gestalt be created that could house the three remaining Spark of the original Predacons. No such feat had been achieved to date, but as the technology was of Autobot creation, then stolen by the Predacons, Razorclaw demanded Csirac bring his wishes to life. The voice of Venus told him to agree, so he did.

Shelving his other work, he was given three protoform bodies, and he worked tirelessly for fear of death, and saw through Razorclaw�s wishes. It was presented to him, and he detested it. After giving Csirac a bit of a thrashing, he demanded another, different body. The voice told him to carry on. He was given three more protoforms, but Csirac asked for a forth, in case something went wrong seeing through Razorclaw�s orders. The request was greeted with suspicion but it was eventually granted.

His new design was applauded by Razorclaw, commending him on a job well done, a job that would see the deaths of thousands of his brothers and sisters in the future. The transfer of Sparks into this new body was delayed however as word reached the Predacons that the Autobots and Maximals were going to attempt another full TransWarp test.

This was the moment Csirac had been waiting for. Regardless of the success or failure of the test flight, as long as the TransWarp engines fired, space and time would be torn. Csirac had built an interface, designed to take his own consciousness to the Allspark and bring back his beloved into the protoform he�d convinced the Predacons he required. No longer would he be alone. The problem was, locked up in the Predacon bunker, he wouldn�t know when the time was right to attempt it.

On the surface, what was to be the final battle for Cybertron raged, as the Predacons had decided an all-out attack was necessary to bring down the Autobots and Maximals in their supposed moment of glory. In the bunker, Venus� voice told Csirac to be patient, as she would tell him when it was the right time. Csirac still tried to dismiss the voice as a manifestation of the stress.

Suddenly, the door of the Lab burst open. The offline form of Magmatron was dragged in, heavily wounded. His troops demanded his help in repairing it and returning him to the battle, but Csirac said his Spark would need a new body, as the one before them was failing. His troops pointed out the spare protoform body, but Venus told him to lie, so he did, telling them it had been corrupted by the testing. They believed him. Another option was the new bodies for Razorclaw and the two other Predacons, but the troops were too scared to even consider taking that away from Razorclaw. The only other option was the original rejected body, still in its combined form. Csirac tried to tell them that it required three Spark to power and control it, and even then hadn�t been tested, but his troops were desperate. They transferred Magmatron�s fluctuating Spark into the combiner. The eyes flickered, the body writhed and the immense form screamed, then fell lifeless and silent. It had seemingly failed. Their frustrations boiled over, just as their comms buzzed to life with requests for backup, and they speedily departed, but not before one took aim at Csirac and blew a hole in his torso.

He slumped to the ground, but his head was lifted by two familiar, slender hands. Venus stood before him, smiling. She told him that it was now time. She helped him get into the interface, and it closed around him. He voyaged into the Matrix.

And he found her, or rather, she was waiting for him, but she said it wasn�t her that would be going back. Four figures of legend stepped up behind her. She told him that she�d been guiding him, but the plan was never for her to go back. She told him to guide the four warriors back, one final act, then to be at peace, with her, in the Matrix.

He returned to his body, the interface leaving a Trans-Ion trail for the Sparks to follow. The last thing Csirac saw, before being welcomed by his beloved�s smiling face, was the mighty forms of Prowl, Silverbolt, Ironhide and Grimlock standing before him. They had returned to the battle and to end the War.

Then, Csirac was at peace.

Verno

5th November 2011, 12:56 PM

�What you have to understand Commander, is that if word of this got out, we�d be plunged back into War in an instant.�

Depth Charge�s optics moved between the three figures seated in front of him.

�And it would be entirely our fault. We�re meant to be the ones who oppose war, not start them.� continued Prowl.

�I get it.� said Depth Charge, already impatient with the proceedings.

�An Autobot... a Maximal, of your experience and skill would be ideal for the posting� began Silverbolt.

�I�ve already said I�d do it, so you can stop blowing smoke up my exhaust. Just tell me what�s going on down there.�

�Very well�, said Prowl. �During the War, the colony served as an Energon mine, deep in the planet�s oceans, and produced an extremely potent form of raw Energon. Because of the subaquatic nature of the mine�s location, the Autobots were able to keep it a secret. Today the mine continues to operate, and has enjoyed great commercial success, and played its part in helping facilitate the rebuilding of Cybertron. Because of its population of mining staff, and differing scenery from here on Cybertron, it was selected to become one of the new Maximal colonies - Colony Omicron.�

�I could�ve read that on the back of the brochure.�

�During the War, miners began to be taken ill because of the potent Energon radiation emitted by the crystals. So potent, that in extreme cases it could result in the extinguishing of a Spark. Because of the War effort, the mining continued, but today, the miners are fitted with thickened exo-structures to absorb the radiation. Some affects are still seen due to the prolonged exposure, but they are minimal in comparison� Prowl added.

�However, Medics stationed at the mine noted an incredible phenomenon. Some miners began to show signs of a tolerance towards the radiation. Their Spark, though appearing like any other, formed a shell of assimilated Energon particles, protecting the integrity of the Spark. Sadly, the miners� minds weren�t as tolerant. Their processors were eventually corrupted by the exposure, resulted in cases of psychosis�, said Silverbolt.

�Scientists began to monitor the miners. A facility was built alongside the mine for the Scientists to study the effects more closely. That facility still exists today, but has moved on to more practical experimentation�, said Prowl. �The experiments they are carrying out are in the hopes they can produce a Spark that is tolerant to greater forms of damage, because of the solidified Energon casing.�

�To put it simply, we�re trying to create immortal super-soldiers�, ended Ironhide.

�I�ve got to hand it to you - whenever you decided to tear up that little piece of paper the three of you signed a few years ago, you used the biggest shredder you could find.�

�The cost of the Great War was far too high�, said Silverbolt. �You must understand that better than most. We�re not foolish enough to believe these Predacons don�t have designs to start it up again someday. We�re making sure any such attempt can be stopped quickly, at a far lesser price.�

�You�ve certainly got yourselves convinced you�re doing the right thing, who am I to second guess?�

Depth Charge stood up and left the Maximal Council Chambers and the Elders behind him.

Verno

5th November 2011, 05:18 PM

As Depth Charge exited from the elevator ride to the ocean floor, he was greeted by a small Maximal.

�Welcome, Commander, we�re delighted you could join us�, he said.

�Thrilled�, replied Depth Charge, scanning the unfamiliar surrounds.

�My name is Statex, and I�ll be giving you a tour of our facility. What have you been told of our work?�

�Nothing good so far� said Depth Charge, as they began to walk.

�Oh, how rude of me to get straight down to business. How are you enjoying your new assignment?�

�Let�s just get on with this� Depth Charge replied, an uneasy feeling coming over him.

�Very well� said Statex cheerily. �The facility has been in use now for 94 years. Oh, years, tsk, stellar cycles. You�ll have to excuse me, I spent a lot of time on Earth in my youth. I was part of the Autobot/Human team that created the Proto-Matter bodies we all enjoy today. Ah, such a beautiful planet. Did you ever see it?�

�Once or twice.�

�Its destruction was a great loss to the universe. But that�s what we�re here trying to prevent - by creating the ultimate deterrent!�

�War Machines.�

Statex stopped.

�Oh, much more than that, Commander, much more. Some of us consider our work to be the next step in out evolution. Others think more along the same lines as yourself - the creation of an indestructible army. I, however, am of the belief that we are in the deifying business: The making of Gods!�

�You�re not serious.�

�Resolutely. Not only will these Maximals outlast Cybertron itself, but they will be of great intelligence, and of supreme physical power. Gods, Commander, Gods. Would you like to meet one?�

They began to walk again.

�Primus in a jar? Sure.�

�He is our current specimen. The nine previous attempts failed, so we�re taking a different approach this time.�

�What do you mean by failed?�

�Their Sparks unfortunately collapsed from the dosages of Energon radiation.�

�You killed them?�

�Their protoforms had never been brought online, so they had no knowledge of Reality. But yes, their Sparks were returned to the Allspark.�

�That�s a hell of a price to pay.�

�Hell? Only once or twice you say?�

They stopped in front of a clear wall with a large Transformer sitting in the room behind it.

�Now, allow me to introduce Protoform 10, or, as he�s become to be known - Protoform X.�

�X? Ominous title.�

�X, of course being��

�Roman numeral for ten�, said Depth Charge interrupting. �Yeah I got it.�

�You spent more time on Earth than you let on, Commander.�

Depth Charge studied the figure in the room.

�He�s online?�

�Very much. As I said, we�re taking a different approach this time. He was brought online as any Transformer would be. But his quarters are fitted with emitters to slowly dose him with radiation in a controlled dosage. His ascension to godhood will be slow, but inevitable.�

�No protection?� asked Depth Charge.

�From what?�, replied Statex, puzzled by the question.

�From the radiation. The High Council�s little brief told me some miners were driven made by the stuff.�

�There is no chance of that�, said Statex, dismissively. �The doses are smaller than even those experienced by today�s miners in their insulated forms. Slow, but inevitable ascension.�

�Commander�, a raspy voice suddenly said.

�He can hear us?� Depth Charge asked, shocked.

�I can�, said Protoform X, �And I can see you�re worried by Statex�s references to me being a god. Don�t worry, I�m not that deluded. I�m just a Maximal, built to serve, as you were. But your war has come and gone, mine is still to come.�

�Sure�, said Depth Charge, the two figures now staring at each other.

�There�s no fear in your Spark, Commander. I�d love to know how it got that way. Maybe you could tell me a story.�

�Some other time�, said Depth Charge, turning back to Statex. I think I�ve seen all I need to.�

�Very well�, said Statex. �I shall accompany you back to the elevator."

As the two figures turned away, a raspy voiced called after them.

�I look forward to it Commander. It�s always nice to make a new friend.�

Depth Charge�s brow furrowed.

RageOnTheRoads

7th November 2011, 08:38 PM

Wow, poor Csirca. That was a bitter sweet tale.

Nice too see Depth Charge full of his trademark arrogance. He really is a magnificent creep. And you wrote him perfectly. :D I really like the first meeting between Depth Charge and X. It is so subtle, dare I say mundane, and yet there is the slightest hint of some unfathomable, unsettling quality beneath it all. It is as if there is something not quite right. (I am picturing Hannibal Lector's first meeting with Clarice now.) The dramatic irony only helps to fuel said quality. Very nicely written indeed. Kudos Verno.

Verno

8th November 2011, 07:20 PM

Wow, poor Csirca. That was a bitter sweet tale.

Yeah, poor bloke, but he gave the Maximals a fighting chance in the final battle.

I needed a way to get the members of the Maximal High Council back into the game, ie - Alive! Mix that with the method Rhinox used in Aftermath to bring Optimus Primal back to life (I figured Rhinox must have seen/read about the technology before attempting it himself somewhere). It also gave me the possibility of getting Grimlock into the story, even though there is no record of him having died in anything I've read, but hey, it's my bloody story! :P

Nice too see Depth Charge full of his trademark arrogance. He really is a magnificent creep. And you wrote him perfectly. :D I really like the first meeting between Depth Charge and X. It is so subtle, dare I say mundane, and yet there is the slightest hint of some unfathomable, unsettling quality beneath it all. It is as if there is something not quite right. (I am picturing Hannibal Lector's first meeting with Clarice now.) The dramatic irony only helps to fuel said quality. Very nicely written indeed. Kudos Verno.

I was/am worried about Depth Charge. Primal says in Deep Metal (in responce to his refusal to join the other Maximals fighting the Predacons, not just Rampage) that there was a time he never would have left, basically meaning he was once a loyal soldier.

However, there is a difference between a loyal soldier who is a walk-over for superiors, and a loyal soldier who has a bit of attitude. So I decided to keep the attitude in, but at the end of the day, he still follows order.

Until Rampage gets into his head of course. Then he goes of on his own vigilantee-thing.

Glad you're enjoying it mate.

Hursticon

12th November 2011, 09:10 PM

Glad you're enjoying it mate.

He isn't the only one; I agree yet again with everything that ROTR has stated as you really do have your mind on the same wave-length as the writers for the BW show, seriously man it's like they're speaking through you or better yet as a student you are simply so well versed in their teachings that their end and your beginning are indistinguishable. ;):cool:

Truly, that meeting between X and DC is absolutely spot on in so many ways Verno - Congratulations! :eek::)

Verno

15th November 2011, 08:54 PM

I've been in Melbourne for the past couple of days, and instead of fleshing out what I've already got, my brain decided it wanted to race to the end of my story arc (the start of TransTech) and write about the final meeting between Primus and Unicron, with Vorus watching on. (Oooo, who is Vorus?!)

Seraphim Prime

18th November 2011, 03:01 PM

Just been reading this thread after finally finishing uni myself. :)

This is fantastic! Love the references to past series, and the high-calibre story telling.

Verno

18th November 2011, 03:32 PM

Just been reading this thread after finally finishing uni myself. :)

This is fantastic! Love the references to past series, and the high-calibre story telling.

Cheers SP, the most important thing for me was to tie it as much as I could to that which already exists in Canon. It gives it 1. Credibility :P and 2. Characters and pieces of storylines that already exist.

What are you studying?

Verno

18th November 2011, 03:41 PM

�Magmatron isn�t dead�, began Rampant, and Ravage�s optics widened. �He was carried from the battlefield, heavily wounded, so we can understand your, assumption, that your blaster fire had been lethal. But the fact remains that he survived, and has now acquired an improved form in the process�, Rampant stated, unsuccessfully hiding his frustration.

�However�, Seethe cut in, for which Ravage was relieved, �his temporary incapacitation served its purpose - we, the Tripredacus Council, are now the recognised leaders of the Predacon faction, and it is due in no small part to your actions.� Ravage remained silent.

�You have valuable skills, Ravage. We may be in use of them again in the future, so we have a proposal�, said Cinder, speaking for the first time. �We have signed a temporary armistice with the Autobots and Maximals. A full Peace accord is being drawn up as we speak - the contents of which will be unpleasant for we Predacons�, he continued. �We will have to forfeit many rights and forgo a number of privileges, but given the alternative now that they are capable of traversing Time, a continued existence is a favoured outcome�.

�But we refuse to capitulate in entirety. Our day to rise up once again will come, and when it does, it will be clean and swift�, said Rampant.

�But until then, we have much to achieve: quietly, and without raising suspicion - a talent you�ve proven to possess�, said Cinder.

�We can offer you pursuits that would satisfy a warrior such as yourself, and in return for your service, we will grant you much, starting with a technologically improved form, one much more fitting to your new role as our Agent�, said Seethe, studying the great black form before them in the Chamber.

�Victory will be ours, in time�, said Cinder. �So what do you say?�

Verno

18th November 2011, 09:29 PM

In Cryotek�s office, the Stranger and the Trainer, Scutter, stand before Cryotek�s desk.

�Now, Gentlemen�, sighed Cryotek, �the matter seems to be straightforward: a bet was made, the fight commenced and a victor rose� But now we�re - here?�

�His fighter had upgraded since his last fight, got some of them eye lasers�, protested Scutter.

�Technical specifications were provided prior to the bout, and impressive specifications they are too�, said Cryotek, nodding his head to the Stranger who remained silent and still. �If you neglected to read them, Scutter, then that is of no fault of our quiet friend.�

�I swear it wasn�t in the techs. He musta forged them afterwards! I�d bet everything on that fight!�

Cryotek shook his head.

�Never bet more than you�re prepared to lose - that�s a very important lesson to have learnt. And as for the authenticity of the specs, we may never know. But I am a great advocate for self-improvement, especially in young Predacons. Therefore, I rule in favour of the defendant. You have two days to make the payment, or I will become, reinvolved�, said Cryotek with finality.

�Thank you�, said the Stranger, who turned to leave the chamber.

�Compliments to your fighter�, Cryotek called after him. Cryotek�s optics returned to the room and to the miserable little Predacon that remained in his presence.

�What now, Scutter?�

�You know who that is, don�t you?� he said, leaning on the front of Cryotek�s desk.

�Of course I do, it�s my business to know.�

�I�ve got an offer for you�, Scutter said quietly.

�And what could you possibly offer me?� said Cryotek, as he went about other business.

�I hear that you�re the �bot to talk to about organising� disappearances? Well, you make that piece of scum vanish and I�ll pay you double what I owed him�, whispered Scutter, but this hadn�t received the response we was after. �And give you a stake in my fighter - he�s only lost three times in his five fights!�

�Oh, impressive�, Cryotek said deridingly. �But am I to understand that you are attempting to solicit the assassination of a fellow Cybertronian? That�s an imprisonable offence.� Cryotek was talking too loudly for Scutter�s liking. �But how about this: I can facilitate your request by passing it on to certain, associates, and you will pay me four times the amount you owed.� Scutter knew he didn�t have that kind of money. �Oh, and you can keep full control of your pitiful combatant - the only fighter to have been defeated by being beaten unconscious with his own dismembered arm.�

�Eh, just forget it�, said Scutter, who knew he wouldn�t get what he wanted and made to leave.

�Forget it?� laughed Cryotek. Scutter stopped. �I�m not in the business of forgetting. So may I suggest that you take my offer, or I might be compelled to inform some of the upstanding Maximal Peace Marshals about your backroom weapons trading.�

�I got out of that years ago!� protested Scutter, sweating.

�I have information that says otherwise�, said Cryotek, in full control. �So, do we have an accord?�

Scutter nodded.

�You have a day to find the money, or the same associates that were to look for our mutual friend might arrive at your door.�

Scutter was screwed.

�Now, get out�, said Cryotek, dismissing the diminutive Predacon, who just five minutes before had been in a small bit of debt to old Warrior, but now found himself at the bottom of a huge pile of slag. He left the room with a look of utter horror on his faceplate.

�So, with his mentor suddenly out of the picture, who would I be not to step in and, help, the impressionable young Predacon, and become the new influence in his future�, gloated Cryotek, reclining in his chair and resting his feet upon the desk. �Oh, Cryotek, you are so very good.�

Verno

20th November 2011, 11:41 AM

�The Decepticons are no more�, said Magnus, studying the two dark figures before him in the chamber. �But this war is far from over. The Predacons have thrown the rulebook out the window, so we�ve had to do the same.�

Rodimus spoke up. �As you�re both probably aware, some of your buddies are stupid enough to want to keep fighting and are now flying the Predacon banner. But when the Autobots win, and trust me, we will, �Cons like you will still have to answer for everything you�ve done during the course of the War. Bots like Megatron and Soundwave have got the easy way out.�

�I don�t like the idea of cutting deals with the enemy, but it�s come to out attention that Megatron had you both running errands behind Pred lines before the Hub assault� continued Magnus, who was enjoying Rodimus� stern tone.

�If word of that reached Razorclaw, he�d be quite interested in finding both of you - so here�s the deal: You keep making those trips, but you�ll be reporting to us instead�, offered Rodimus, with no hint of kindness.

�And when it�s all over, your assistance in ending the War will be shown on your records, might even get you off some of the heavier charges�, added Magnus. �This is your chance to make amends. So, what do you say?�

Ravage and Laserbeak looked at each other, then silently agreed, nodding to their new Autobot allies.

Verno

20th November 2011, 12:20 PM

The two Decepticons stood in the light in the centre of an enormous room, as a large, familiar form entered, arms outstretched. �Laserbeak, Ravage, old friends! Welcome to the Predacons!�, announced Razorclaw, with little warmth in his raspy voice.

�I was saddened to hear about Soundwave. He was a great warrior, his talents were wasted under Megatron though, whose insane plans cost too many their Sparks�, he said, twisting the knife in the back of his dead leader, to the cheers of the Predacon troops in the darkness surrounding them.

�Our forces, however, grow stronger by the day�, he continued, motioning to the hall full of Predacon combatants, eagerly grinning in the darkness, studying the two ancient warriors. �And are buoyed by recruits such as yourselves.� There were sniggers from the Predacons in the darkness. Ravage and Laserbeak felt uneasy in the spotlight.

�But sadly there is little time for reminiscing about the good old days, we must get down to business.� Razorclaw, produced a large blaster, and from point-blank range, blew a hole through the chest of Laserbeak, who crumbled lifeless to the floor. Raucous cheering exploded from the audience of Predacons. Ravage prepared himself for the pain, but it never came.

�I won�t suffer fools!�, boomed Razorclaw. �I learnt that from Megatron, though he changed his tune towards the end - desperation will do that to you�, continuing his rant against his old master. He stepped closer to Ravage.

�There have been whispers, Ravage, voices in my ear asking why you�ve come. A more loyal Decepticon could never have be found, Megatron�s favourite pet, yet here you stand, ready to serve a turncoat.� The room was silent.

�You have talents I can utilise, Ravage, but let Laserbeak�s smouldering wreck be a lesson to you - if your resolve wavers even for a moment, you�ll end up on the slag heap next to your comrade. Have I made myself clear?� Razorclaw was now face to face with Ravage. Ravage held his gaze.

�As I said before�, Razorclaw said as he turned and exited into the darkness, �Welcome to the Predacons.�

----

I hope you're all enjoying the opening stages of Spotlight: Ravage (3 of the 4 last posts, the one with Cryotek is from Spotlight: Dinobot). I'm open to comments about everything, but would be very interested in hearing from G1 fans about Laserbeak being used. I needed someone to get offed in the scene to set the tone, but is Laserbeak too beloved? Is there someone else people would rather see killed? They don't necessarily have to be a cassette.

Verno

20th November 2011, 04:20 PM

�The famous Ravage�� said a voice. Ravage turned to see a large red Bot approaching. �Or should that be infamous. Stories of your endeavours are legend. My name is Magmatron, one of Razorclaw�s Generals��

�One of, but certainly not the only, much to Razorclaw�s relief I�m sure�, a cold voice said. Ravage and Magmatron were joined by three dark, imposing figures. �I am General Seethe, these are Generals Rampant and Cinder. I�m sure you�ve heard tell of us - the Tripredacus Brotherhood.�

�Their reputation for tactics precedes them. That for their courage is yet to be found�, said Magmatron, with a smile in the corner of his mouth, making no attempt to hide the bite of the cutting remark.

�Your addition to the ranks will only boost the fearsome prestige the Predacons enjoy� Cinder added, apparently unaffected by Magmatron�s jibe.

�Hmph�, said Magmatron with derision. �It�ll soon be clear to our honoured recruit who�s earned their �prestige�, and who stole it after the efforts of others.� The distrust between the Generals, Ravage thought, was clearer than anything at present. He was sure the Autobots would be interested in this.

�If you wish to discuss leadership styles, then we would be glad to oblige you, at another time�, said Seethe, dismissingly. All traces of Magmatron�s earlier smirk were gone. �Now, however, we have more pressing matters to cover with our new compatriot.�

Magmatron knew the conversation was over, and turned back to Ravage. �It was a pleasure to meet such a formidable warrior. It�s an honour to serve beside you.� Magmatron turned and walked away without so much as a look towards the three Generals.

The Brothers watched him leave, before ushering Ravage to accompany them. �Come, Ravage, we have much to discuss.�

Verno

20th November 2011, 06:34 PM

As the four figures continued down the corridor, Cinder began the conversation. �You will have to excuse Magmatron. He is eager to please and prove himself to anyone willing to listen, even one as new to our ranks as yourself.�

�His position has come through nothing but chance and stupidity - pay him no heed�, spat Rampant, clearly a Predacon of few words, but all of them spiteful.

�Razorclaw has informed us that we are to be your commanding officers. We are delighted to have been chosen, and are certain that we�ll make full use of your highly respected talents in espionage�, said Cinder, as they reached the entrance to a chamber, and ushered Ravage in.

�As Magmatron curtly alluded, we advise Razorclaw on matters of tactics and strategy.� The three Generals took positions behind a large console, Ravage on the other side of it. The door closed and locked with finality.

�We also monitor the intelligence gathering, intercepting Autobot and Maximal communications, something we�ve been successful with up until this point, but your addition to the fold will improve our abilities in this area to no end�, said Seethe, staring from behind the console.

�Given the amount of information we intercept, both foreign and friendly, we have also become an unofficial force for policing our own troops, weeding out disloyalty�, added Cinder. Ravage suddenly realised just how trapped he was.

�So as you can see, we wield considerable power and influence in this young faction�, ended Cinder.

�We�re under no illusions as to why you�re here�, said Rampant, coldly. Ravage was ready to fight his way out if need be, but didn�t give anything away. �With Soundwave and Megatron dead, you suddenly find yourself without a strong leader to stand behind.� More talking isn�t what Ravage was expecting from Rampant.

�You�re not a coward; you simply have no aspirations higher than post. You�re a soldier, you live to serve your faction.� Seethe�s words weren�t calming his circuits just yet. �We are no different�, he continued. �Our aim is to strengthen the Predacon Army in every capacity we can.�

�We want you to kill Magmatron.�

Silence greeted Rampant�s words. �He is reckless, brash, na�ve and foolish, and breeds such poor qualities in the troops he commands�, spat Rampant. Ravage couldn�t believe what he was hearing. These Predacons would put Starscream to shame.

�For the Predacon leadership to stay strong, we can�t put our hopes in stray blaster fire to see out our wishes�, said Cinder, rejoining the discussion. �For the good of the Predacon cause, it must be a precise strike, one that finds its mark with full lethality.�

�In order for our path to be clear and the future to remain bright, Magmatron must be removed�, pressed Seethe. �Your skills for this task are second to none, and you�ve witnessed firsthand what an unstable leadership can do to a side.�

�We�ll give you time to consider your answer, but we know you�ll make the right decision�, added Cinder, �for the good of the Predacon cause.�

Verno

21st November 2011, 12:39 PM

In an Autobot Command room, sits two Autobots - a red one and a yellow one.

�Have you read Ravage�s report?� asked Rodimus, throwing the tablet containing the report over the desk.

�He�s good, very detailed�, replied Bumblebee.

�Oh yeah, infighting amongst the Generals - who would have thought�, replied Rodimus, mocking the reports contents.

�Joke all you like, but if the report is accurate, and the leadership is that fragile, it lends itself to implosion�, said Magnus, returning from another meeting with a worried expression. �Razorclaw has shown himself to rule with an iron fist.�

�Yeah�, Bumblebee chimed in, �I mean, Laserbeak wasn�t just some Protoform off the shelf, he was an experienced warrior, and he killed him, just like that.�

�If Razorclaw could be removed�� began Magnus.

�Because killing him has been so easy to do before now�, said Rodimus, cutting him off.

�We didn�t have a man on the inside before now�, said Magnus, his mind somewhere else.

�Ravage?� questioned Rodimus.

�If he can get close enough...� said Magnus, only to be cut off by Rodimus, again.

�He�d be scrap before getting out of their compound.�

�Then we offer him protection�, said Magnus, now with anger in his voice.

�Protection? For a Decepticon?� asked Rodimus, not backing down from his objection.

�We�ve got to offer him something�, said Bumblebee, trying to ease the situation.

�A job that big carries an equally big price tag�, said Magnus, who didn�t like the idea of making a deal with Ravage in the first place, but knew there was nothing else to be done.

�How big?� said Rodimus.

�Amnesty�, said a commanding voice in the doorway. There, back on his own two feet for the first time in far too long, stood�

�Optimus�, Bumblebee said, delighted to see his leader back in the land of the living. All communication with Prime for the recent past had been done through his core consciousness. But there was something in his voice that gave confidence. Rodimus was also glad to see him, but continued his opposition to the idea.

�You can�t be serious, Prime.�

�Razorclaw�s Armada is headed for Cybertron.� Everyone fell silent. �We�ve lost communication with several Maximal outposts.�

�How long do we have?� asked Rodimus, now understanding Magnus� worried expression.

�A week, at best.�

�We won�t be ready!� exclaimed Bumblebee.

�When have we ever been, old friend?� said Optimus, his voice strong and resolute. �If Ravage can stop Razorclaw, then we owe him his freedom.�

�You�re putting all your hopes of victory in a Decepticon?� queried Rodimus.

�In the spark of an enemy, there will be salvation, and in the darkest hour, there will be a light�, said Prime, reciting the Covenant, for which Rodimus had never held much stead.

�There�s got to be something else. What about the ship?�

Prime shook his head. �The scientists are still gun-shy after their last test, and progress has been slow since Csirac was killed.�

�You don�t know that he�s dead�, said Bumblebee with hope. �Maybe they�ve kidnapped him, trying to get him to help them.�

�As the Maximal say�, Rodimus interjected, �Better dead than Pred.�

�I would never wish harm to a fellow Autobot, but given his knowledge of our technology, I hope you�re right�, said Prime.

Hursticon

23rd November 2011, 12:42 PM

Verno, this is seriously excellent stuff and I think that your recent focus on tackling your narrative in a Spotlight by spotlight way is a wise and efficient approach too dude - I'm loving Spotlight: Ravage at the moment! :D

There is so much possibility here and I'm really enjoying your brush strokes; A character like Ravage (in this situation he presently finds himself), who's personality is basically founded on unwavering loyalty, would really be immeasurably torn IMO as he's never been faced with such a core character challenge like this. :eek:
Being that there are such high stakes and being uncontrollably forced to combat the question of allegiance, between 4 different parties no less - each with their own pros/cons and baggage, I believe make for quite a through-&-through G1 story of Spotlight: Ravage really. ;)

With the backdrop of that era coming to a close, it makes this particular story all the more engaging. :cool:

...

Honestly man I think you're doing too good of a job really for me to suggest anything you could change or do differently, as I just keep coming up with nothing but praise :o

I think the best suggestion I could possibly give at this moment would be that you should definitely continue your candid use of G1 fan favourite characters and remain steadfast in their treatment, don't be afraid to take them to task with both grand and pointless deaths either as that is a core facet to the success of LSOTW. :)

Remember, there is a reason why the Autobot and Decepticon brands are 'retired' by the new Cybertronian casts; give them reasons to be laid to rest. ;):cool:

P.S. The manner of death Laserbeak faces really drives home the regime change but also illustrates the bold decisions you're willing to tackle - I like this. :D
P.S.S. I'm also looking forward to seeing how the Maximal group begin to rise to the decision making level akin to that of Rodimus, Magnus & Prime, I think the hand over will be quite a curious subject to tackle and you're damn capable of the challenge dude. :cool:

Verno

23rd November 2011, 06:03 PM

In an Autobot Command Room:

[Many subgroups have made their home within the Predacon ranks, perhaps most interestingly of all are the Voidists, who seem to have assumed a role as personal bodyguards for the Tripredacus Brotherhood. The Voidists escort them everywhere and follow their every command, without question. This has only added to the Brotherhood�s aura of intrigue, as no one seems to know a definitive story of their origins - it�s as if the Brothers just appeared on the battlefield. So for them to be obeyed by�]

�What?!� said Rodimus, reading the section of Ravage�s report again. �These �Voidists� are� Unicron Worshippers?� he asked.

�So he says�, replied Magnus, watching the door.

�Does he mean Sweeps?� Rodimus questioned, scanning the report further.

�I don�t think so. Prime was confident he took out the last of them with Galvatron�, Magnus answered, still preoccupied.

�So these freaks are following the Brothers around? Like they�re some kind of Unicron spawn?�

�We�ve seen Cultists before - they�re all nuts, and it�s been pretty quiet on the Unicron front since 2005, if you excuse Galvatron of course. So if the Brothers have spun them a story that they�re somehow of his making, then the Cultists would probably jump in front of blaster fire for them.�

�Must be a hell of a story�, said Rodimus, returning to the report, but he was interrupted by the arrival of several Maximals in the doorway, dwarfed by Optimus Prime behind them. The meeting to organise the defence of Cybertron against the Predacon Armada would soon begin.

Rodimus knew better than to doubt the Maximals abilities on the battlefield. Though smaller in size, they�d proven themselves worthy warriors against the Decepticons. Although the name was originally adopted by Earth-bound Autobots, the term �Maximal� was soon adopted by all off-world Autobot forces. When the Predacons announced their separation from the Decepticons by destroying Earth, the Maximals (though still Autobots) became a force unto themselves to battle the Predacon threat.

The leaders took seats around the table.

�Welcome friends�, said Prime, bringing the meeting to order. �The future is rapidly approaching and soon the blasters will fall silent. This War has stretched for millennia, and its cost has been far too great, but I think we all sense that it is coming to an end. Let us make sure that those that have gone before us have no died in vain.�

Verno

25th November 2011, 01:42 PM

What's a good comic without an inner monologue over the top of a montage of epic images?!

*Ravage walking through Predacons troops preparing for battle*

It is the eve of War and I don�t know who or what I�m fighting for: The battlefield is familiar, but not the names. I�ve joined a faction founded on the betrayal of my old one, but only because I�d made a deal with the enemy, and since arriving, I�ve been recruited by three ambitious Generals to do in another, whose only crime, in their eyes, is his success.

*The Autobots and Maximals also preparing for battle*

The Autobots - are still the enemy; I�ve made no peace with them. Who are they to dictate the terms of my freedom?! They haven�t won yet.

*Razorclaw sharpening a sword or something cool like that, and perhaps highlighting a 'Razorclaw' insignia branded over the top of a Decepticon one on his arm*

Razorclaw - The Autobots have failed to extinguish his Spark, and he�s proven himself a true leader throughout the course of this War - who am I to kill him? After all, he�s made of Decepticon parts. If he can win the day, then my freedom is assured, and with no Autobot strings attached.

The Brotherhood understand his importance as Leader. They�ve ordered their personal guard to aid in his safekeeping. He refused it, laughing off the need for added protection for a warrior such as himself, and I admit if I were him I would be offended to be offered such a thing, but they insisted. He is safe, from both the Autobots, and from their orders to me.

*Magmatron in deep contemplation before battle, much like the image of him in a chair at the start of BW: The Gathering*

Magmatron - �sigh�. Deceit is at the very core of a Decepticon: we serve ourselves. The Brotherhood play the diplomatic card well, and their favour within the Predacons will continue to rise, even with the suspicious and mystery that surrounds them. To be in their favour in this new faction could only be an advantage to me. So in order to secure it, and perhaps to the detriment of the Predacons - Magmatron� must die.

Verno

25th November 2011, 02:33 PM

More montage action!

[Ravage is in hiding, not far from the frontline. He is watching Magmatron and his troops engage the Autobot enemy head on.]

*From inside Ravage's optics looking out, showing he has target lock on Magmatron*

He is a warrior of great power and courage. He stands beside his troops, shoulder to shoulder, against the enemy. True leadership like this is in short supply - I�ve only ever really seen it in two others: One carried the Matrix, the other wished to rip it from his chest.

*Montage of images of Magmatron delivering some good old fashioned ass kicking*

I served Megatron loyally until the end, with complete trust, even when others doubted it. That kind of trust can only be earned here, forged on the frontline, not scheming in the background, stealing victories from those who died to attain them.

*Close up of Magmatron enjoying tearing an Autobot apart*

There is much of Megatron in this young Predacon. Perhaps he is what this faction needs for the future - someone who will lead, instead of manipulate.

*Magmatron leading his troops forward*

Yes.

*Ravage following them in full stealth mode*

He is a leader of the future� For the future. There is desire in his eyes. There is hope for those around him. There is�

*Magmatron is cut down with very heavy blaster fire, taking extremely heavy damage and falls to the ground, we presume dead*

No!

Verno

26th November 2011, 01:04 PM

Ravage froze. Magmatron�s troops were returning fire in the direction from where the shots had come. They were yelling orders to each other to get Magmatron�s smoking body back to cover. Ravage could have helped, should have - the bright future for the Predacons Ravage had just seen now lay dying with Magmatron amidst the rubble. But Ravage did nothing. The troops soon retreated carrying the lifeless body; all Ravage could do was watch, thoughts racing through his processors. He was suddenly jolted back into action by the sound of approaching Autobot and Maximal forces. He ran.

As he made for the Predacon line, the details began to come into focus. Ravage had witnessed the very thing he�d been charged with doing. Magmatron was dead, but he wished he wasn�t.

He was soon well behind the Predacon line when he reactivated his communications. They screamed with chatter. Talk of a death - lots of talk. It seemed word of Magmatron�s passing had spread quickly. But as Ravage began to filter the noise, a different name was being shouted. Not Magmatron, but Razorclaw. Razorclaw� was dead!

A broadcast broke over the top of the chatter.

�This is General Seethe. With the tragic death of Razorclaw, Generals Cinder, Rampant and I are taking command of the Predacon forces. We�re ordering a temporary halt to engagement to regroup and take stock of loses. I repeat - an immediate halt to engagement to reorder our forces. Those who disobey will be terminated with extreme prejudice.�

Losses had been severe on both sides, but the Predacons had made strong inroads into Autobot positions before the pullback. The loss of Razorclaw and Magmatron would weigh heavily on the efforts going forward, but as long as the Brotherhood could maintain control of the group, the Predacons may still win the day.

But the Predacons were fracturing before Ravage�s eyes. Disheartened by the deaths of the two popular leaders, the Brothers were struggling to maintain harmony between the rabble of sub-groups. The Voidists had returned to the Brotherhood�s side, seemingly unharmed. Whoever got to Razorclaw was swift to get past such a formidable force.

Soon a new plan of attack was devised, and the battlefield rejoined. The Autobots had taken advantage of the lull and launched another TransWarp ship. The Brotherhood scrambled fighters to intercept it and engage the squadron of accompanying Maximal fighters.

In the sky above Cybertron, the Xelor fired up its engines. The crew onboard could do little but hope, knowing the fate that would await them if the engines failed.

Success.

The engines tore a hole through space and plunged the ship through it, bringing it back to before it actually left. The Autobots and Maximals now had a weapon of ultimate power.

The battle raged below on Cybertron unabated. Then, by some twist of the Universe, or by Primus� hand, the Autobot and Maximal forces were bolstered by the return of four mighty warriors: Ironhide, Silverbolt and Prowl in an incredible combining form, and Grimlock! The tide had well and truly turned.

To press the point home, the Xelor completed another successful flight. The brotherhood had no choice - they offered the Autobots and Maximals their surrender on behalf of all Predacons.

The Great� was over.

Verno

26th November 2011, 01:18 PM

Somewhere, in what was a secret Predacon research facility, but now looked like it had been torn apart from the inside out, the rubble began to move. Deep beneath it a set of optics flickered. The debris erupted as a massive form surged upwards. It screamed with pain. As the dust settled, it studied its new form. Enormous, powerful. It looked upon its old body, then stepped on it, as the huge figure smashed its way from the building.

Magmatron� still functioned!

Verno

26th November 2011, 01:19 PM

�A job well done.�

Ravage sat opposite three old foes, miraculously returned from the dead.

�From the reports we�ve received, Razorclaw was very heavily guarded, but you somehow found a way to cut him down�, said Silverbolt. �You�ve done us a great service.�

Ravage sat in silence. He didn�t know who had slain Razorclaw, but if they believed him to be the assassin, then he wouldn�t tell them otherwise.

�You held up your end of the bargain - helping bring an end to the War�, said Ironhide, with coldness in his voice. �You were promised your freedom, and as much as I�d like to renege on the deal�� he continued, glancing to the two beside him for confirmation. He couldn�t bring himself to say it.

�All participation in the War is pardoned�, finished Prowl.

Silence returned to the chamber.

Ravage slowly stood up, received no sign of protest from the three behind the desk, turned and walked from the chamber.

A cold voiced called after him.

�Enjoy the peace, Predacon.�

Hursticon

26th November 2011, 02:04 PM

A job well done Verno, a bloody good job indeed; I honestly cannot wait for Spotlight Dinobot and Magmatron but there are also so many other directions you could focus on with so many possibilities. ;):cool:

I am rather impressed with how many characters you've managed to weave into just Ravage's Spotlight without having it seem like Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InrQBpj__Vc) levels of excessive :p, I know I'd be curious to see how Grimlock takes to his new life and form as well as how the Tripredacus Brotherhood manage to convince the Predacon forces to disarm and remain on Cybertron rather than simply fleeing to regroup. ;):)

Keep up the excellent work man, the images whirling in my head with each additional post leads me to only want more. :D

http://i1032.photobucket.com/albums/a409/Darkone666au/Webpics/cheetorthumb.png

Verno

27th November 2011, 06:04 PM

A job well done Verno, a bloody good job indeed; I honestly cannot wait for Spotlight Dinobot and Magmatron but there are also so many other directions you could focus on with so many possibilities. ;):cool:

Thanks mate. I've really appreciated your possitive and constructive comments throughout.

Magmatron's origins are somewhat covered in Ravage, so I probably won't give him his own story. Dinobot, however, needs giving a good crack over the holidays.

I am rather impressed with how many characters you've managed to weave into just Ravage's Spotlight without having it seem like Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InrQBpj__Vc) levels of excessive :p, I know I'd be curious to see how Grimlock takes to his new life and form as well as how the Tripredacus Brotherhood manage to convince the Predacon forces to disarm and remain on Cybertron rather than simply fleeing to regroup. ;):)

Grimlock is just a bad-ass. I'll have to give him some more coverage in a few of the other stories, because you're right - his new life would take some adapting to.

The Preds staying on Cybertron all ties back to the Great Upgrade and the conditions applied to them by partaking in it. Dinobot's story should go into it some more. Plus the Tripredacus Councils quiet promises of an uprising in the future.

Keep up the excellent work man, the images whirling in my head with each additional post leads me to only want more. :D

I'd love someone on the board to lend some pencil-work to the project and draw some of the images. It'd add to the experience!

Verno

8th January 2012, 01:51 PM

I found this old gem whilst reading going through some files on my parents computer, thought I might share it and anything else I find along the way.

---

Magmatron enters the Control chamber of the Tripredacus Council. He closes the doors behind himself, taking his place as the head of the Predacon Army. All minions are enjoying the reaping and pillaging taking place out in the streets of Cyberton. The power appears to be out. As Magmatron sits down, a voice echoes around the darkened room.

You�re attempt on my spark�

*Magmatron is startled and fires into the darkness of the chamber*

�is forgivable. You were just a puppet, obeying the hands that controlled you. I sense however�

*Magmatron fires again, still unable to see a target*

�that the recruitment was of your own design. A stroke of genius one might say, or a fools vision.

*Magmatron fires repeatedly into the shadows*

Whatever the reasoning, I felt a need to thank you�

*A shadow looms up from behind Magmatron*

�Personally.

Verno

8th January 2012, 02:32 PM

BW Megatron really is a delicious character to write for, yes.

Here we see some more of his exploits after the previous scene.

-----

Megatron leads the 3 figures back into their Control Room. The room is in disarray, showing signs of a battle. The body of Magmatron is suspended from the wall, his own sword through his chest, pinning him there.

"My apologies for the mess, he�d made himself quite at home", said Megatron. "I don�t think he realised just how long he�d be spending here, in his crypt", he added with a smile. "Consider it a lasting monument to beginning of the new Predacon Era!"

"Its appearance matters not, is everything functional?" asked Ram Horn, wishing to resume control quickly.

"I was wrong about the Maximals; though their willingness to work leaves much to be desired, they do serve some purpose, but they will learn, yes.

The Council took this as a 'yes, everything is functional' and retook their seats.

"Excellent. You have done well, Megatron", said Sea Clamp, "but you have much to be getting on with. Maximus Prime is still alive. Things would progress much easier if he were not."

"It will be done my Lords. I � take my leave of you", said Megatron, bowing his head and backing out of the door.

"He cannot be trusted", said Cicadacon, turning to brothers as soon as the doors closed.

"Of course he can�t, but he is in no position to interfere nor threaten us", said Ram Horn, confidently.

The display screens of their tactical console spring to life, displaying Megatron�s grinning face.

"Yes, those Maximals did work hard, but couldn�t assist me in a few old fashioned Predacon, luxuries, if you will", said Megatron, his eyes narrowing.

The Councilors chairs extend electrified bonds, trapping the 3 robots.

"Megatron..." said Cicadacon, as he struggled with the bonds.

"Yes, the galaxy will, as before, cower at that name - a name that will once again rise above all others!" Megatron raved.

"What is the meaning�" Sea Clamp began, but was cut off.

"The meaning, is redemption, yes! You�ve play me for a fool, maneuvered me against other pawns on your board, but no longer! This pawn has been crowned and now the board is mine to rule!" Megaron's voiced boomed through the console and echoed around the chamber.

"And where do we fit on your board?" asked Cicadacon, bitterly.

"Mwaa haa haa haa haaaa. You don�t!"

The screen flickered off. There is a moment of silence before...

*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM*

Verno

12th February 2012, 05:23 PM

Here are a couple of pics that I've managed to wring from my brain.

http://i1105.photobucket.com/albums/h357/Rh1n0x/4af93f9b.jpg

http://i1105.photobucket.com/albums/h357/Rh1n0x/e41c3ba0.jpg

The accompanying text is still very much a work in progress, and come from Transformers: Loyalty and Transformers: Ambition respectively, both part of the overarching VernoVerse.

Comments and derision are most welcome.

Hursticon

17th February 2012, 12:05 AM

*snip*

Ooh...
I like this, a very powerful and wise Enemy Leader finding himself in a situation of feeling quite the lesser and being utterly frustrated by that fact; very powerful imagery Verno dude and I like where it leads...

*snip*

...To an awesome hand to hand battle that has clearly left Megatron as the victor but the details of said event have been left tantalisingly absent! :D

You really know how to write for BW Megatron man, as soon as you start reading you can immediately visualise the seen whilst mentally having David Kaye speak the lines to you - I love it and only want more! :cool:
I like how you've ended the scene with a bang, but on who's end is the bang? - With the Tripredacus Council or with Megatron?; Curiouser and curiouser! ;):cool:

Here are a couple of pics that I've managed to wring from my brain.

*snip*

The accompanying text is still very much a work in progress, and come from Transformers: Loyalty and Transformers: Ambition respectively, both part of the overarching VernoVerse.

Comments and derision are most welcome.

Man, those are some fairly good pics dude, especially the 1st pic of Galvy and Megs; The pic of BW Megatron looking on as the Axalon is taking off? - It is quite decent too, I think you've done rather well to etch those mental images mate. ;):)

Verno

19th February 2012, 12:05 PM

Cheers Hursty, and thanks again for being a continuing reader. I'll be sure to get you a signed copy once it's published.

The stuff with BW Megs, Magmatron and the Tripredacus Council I wrote after IDW put The Gathering out, but before The Ascending was released. Thus the mention of Magmatron's attempt on Megatron's life.

The first pic I basically copied from Megatron Origins and Spotlight: Galvatron. Drawn by hand, but copied by sight.

The second is actually BW Megs looking at the Ark, just after he dug the tunnel in BW Season 1 (which we never actually see him do). With some darker black, more lava and more rock it would look more like the cave in the volcano/St Hillary.

Verno

22nd February 2012, 10:58 AM

I dislike humans in TF comics, but couldn't resist writing this little scene, which is part of the Golden Disk backstory. Enjoy.

Earth. 1976 AD.

The door was ajar. Samuels knocked before poking his head through, unsure of being in the right place in this rat warren. "Hello?"

"Ah, Director, yes come in", said Leslie, sitting behind his desk, standing to greet him. "Please, shut the door."

Samuels was already unimpressed, and made it clear as he said "This better be good."

"Yes, I understand this must be a busy time for you and everyone at the agency"' said Leslie, retaking his seat as Samuels sat opposite.

"Too busy to be making pointless trips to Washington", said Samuels, studying the contents of the office.

"Best then to not keep you any longer than necessary", said Leslie, with a polite smile. "I understand you've voiced some concerns about the input Washington has had on your current project. I wanted to personally speak to you to allay your concerns."

"You couldn't have put it in a letter instead of dragging me in here?" asked Samuels.

"I'd prefer to keep the contents of our discussion to remain confidential, instead of warming a bottom draw somewhere in NASA", said Leslie, keeping his polite tone.

"Sure" was the reply from Samuels.

"Let me get straight to it. Director, you're an intelligent man, we live in a world, or should I say on a world, whose mysteries are solved seemingly daily, which is why men like you and I have turned our attentions skyward, to the bigger mysteries that remain unsolved, and namely, the biggest question mankind has ever asked itself - 'Are we alone?'. While the discovery of life on other planets isn't NASA's prime directive, it is a pursuit that that we cannot afford to overlook. If there are Klingons out there, we'd like to know before before they arrive."

"Cute", said Samuels, not enjoying the attempt at humor.

Leslie studied him for a moment before continuing. "The fact of the matter is that we already have an answer to the question, and have done for close to two thousand years, we simply didn't know it."

Samuels was starting to get annoyed. "What are you saying? That we've found little green men?"

"Not quite"' said Leslie, "but evidence of their visitations to Earth however, that we most certainly have."

Samuels couldn't believe what he has hearing. "Well I'll be damned", said Samuels, shaking his head. "I thought all the wackos spent their time wearing tin foil hats and watching the static on their television for messages from outer space, but apparently they've infiltrated the corridors of power and are now running this country."

Hursticon

22nd February 2012, 11:50 PM

Hehe, I like this guy Samuels sense of humour! :p:D
Very intriguing stuff here dude, you'll have to collate all of your Golden Disk work into a single Spotlight thread too - Your brain must be going crazy with all of this story built up within it! :eek::cool:

Verno

23rd February 2012, 08:14 AM

It was the only way I could think of to open the story. I'm sure it will see a lot of changes over time, but it's a base to build on.

The Samuels guy is somewhat based on Depth Charge, a no nonsense kind of guy with a dark sense of humor.

Verno

24th February 2012, 10:07 AM

Optimus Prime and Hound sit in a command room. In front of them are 2 view screens; one showing the torso of Ultra Magnus, the other that of Rodimus.

Magnus' face was one of concern as he began.

Magnus: The Preds are attempting to recruit Decepticons.

Rodimus: Attempting? You mean succeeding. They started that long before the Decepticons folded.

Magnus: As such we really don't know the strength of their forces. Estimates from Maximal survivors vary, but the way it's shaping up - they might have us.

Hound: So what do we do?

Rodimus: Nothing. I say bring 'em on! We can handle them.

Magnus: It may still come to that. But there is another option.

Rodimus: No way. Decepticons?! They'd shoot us as soon as our backs were turned!

Hound: Many Decepticons hold a grudge against Razrclaw for splintering. That was clear when we fought with them at The Hub.

Magnus: And as it stands, that truce is still in place.

Rodimus: It became obsolete the moment they did - they'd never honour it. They'll just sit by as us and the Preds duke it out, then knock over the winners while their heads are still spinning.

Magnus: I don't think so. No one could unite them.

Rodimus: Shockwave!

Magnus: They won't trust he and his logic again.

Hound: So what do we do?

Magnus: We put the call out.

Rodimus: And what? Open our doors to Ex-'Cons turned Pred spies? That's just asking for trouble. We've done it alone up until now, we can see it through to the end!

Magnus: This is your call, Prime.

Prime: The dream of a united Cybertron is one that many of us gave up on long ago.

A smile stretched across Rodimus' face.

Prime: But if it's ever going to come to pass, it has to start somewhere. The Hub assault brought us together with the Decepticons, let's see how close we still are.

Rodimus' smile had vanished.

Verno

24th February 2012, 05:58 PM

Ok, here we go.

This is where the VernoVerse begins.

It picks up where the Marvel G2 comics left off all those years ago.

What better way to pick it up than with a monologue from Optimus Prime. And what better way to start it than with Optimus ironically quoting himself.

Sit back, relax and enjoy the story.

"A choice must be made, for only together, united as one race, can we truly survive... and prosper."

How did it go so wrong?

It seemed that peace was within our grasp. Some, however, we're all too keen to see that we never reached it.

Razorclaw. Talk of his death proved to be false. Like the beast he is, he just kept coming. He feasted on the growing disdain for our alliance emanating from the Decepticons. It was hoped a mutual enemy in the Cybertronian Empire would keep a lid on the derision. We were wrong.

While still flying the colours of the Decepticons, the Predacons began to see through their own agenda.

Targeting our off-world installations, these renegade Predacons began to stockpile Energon and resources. In the interests of continuing the alliance, Autobots weren't to fire upon these rebellious Decepticons unless fired upon first.

But this couldn't continue. We had to be proactive in response to this burgeoning enemy. If we couldn't fire upon them, we had to find someone that could.

The Maximals were born.

All off-world Autobot troops were rebranded, and we could now fight back, within the terms of the alliance.

The war was now being fought on two fronts. The Maximals countering the Predacons, and the Autobot-Decepticon alliance battling the Cybertronian Empire, who were continuing to launch attacks on Cybertron.

They were the greater enemy. Their true size - unknown. Their true ambitions - likewise. As little as we knew of them and the Liege Maximo, we knew they were coming. But it wasn't they whom destroyed the Earth.

Humans had long been our allies, and the Earth a base for our operations in that part of the galaxy. It was also home to labs built for the development of new technologies, namely the continued experiments with Micromaster technology.

Dwindling resources had long been an impetus for improved efficiency. Our, now Maximal, scientists delivered us an incredible advantage: Proto-Matter Technology.

New recruits brought online were outfitted with these new, smaller and vastly more efficient bodies.

It was at this point that the war changed, again.

Megatron requested that the technology be shared with the Decepticons, in the interests of defeating the Empire, who we were hearing, we're moving towards something big. I refused his request, and this gave Razorclaw the final bit of momentum he needed to act on a larger scale.

Megatron, who years earlier would have simply taken the technology by force, accepted my decision, much to the surprise to the majority of his troops.

In contrast, Razorclaw launched an all out attack on Earth; one we never saw coming.

They destroyed the Earth, and in doing so, announced their separation from the Deceptiocons. The Predacons had truly arrived.

Losses - Catastrophic. 7 billion dead in one day, and any human survivors scattered amongst the stars.

Decepticons left in droves for the greener pastures that was the Predacons. Megatron was impressed by the ferocious act, but outraged by the betrayal.

As terrible as this all was, it was about to get much worse.

The Hub, home of the Liege Maximo, had been found. We now knew the what and the where of their forces, but the greatest surprise was the terrifying why.

With a contingent left behind to protect Cybertron from the new Predacon menace, an army was amused. Made up of Autobots, Maximals and those Decepticons still loyal to Megatron, he and I led the assault to destroy The Hub and deny the Liege what he saw as his destiny.

The day was won. The casualties great. None greater than that of Megatron himself.

Magnus has since described Megatron's final stand to me as Magnificent. Coming from Magnus, that's saying something. I wish I could have seen it.

I'd taken heavy damage and was drifting in stasis amongst the debris of battle. I was offline for many cycles. When I awoke, the Decepticons were no more.

With the heavy losses from both the assault on The Hub and desertion to the Predacons, the Decepticons were a mere shadow of their former glory. Shockwave, to whom the leadership had fallen, had little choice than to declare the Decepticons defunct. It was only logical after all.

So here we stand. The war has changed again, as has the enemy. That sense of peace that had been so strong has faded - but isn't gone. This war will soon be at an end.

Hursticon

27th February 2012, 11:21 AM

Absolutely delightful Verno, especially the previous post; I like where you're intending to start things and your characterisation is remaining to be superb. ;):cool:
I know you're probably getting sick of hearing it from me but, more more! :D

Verno

27th February 2012, 08:54 PM

Cheers as always Hursty. Just for you, here's another draft of a previous scene. Since writing it this arvo, I've changed the direction of it again, but it's coming along. Enjoy!

-----

Csirac came back online and his sensors screamed. He groaned as he tried to move.

"Ah excellent, you're awake", said a wraspy voice.

Csirac tried to focus his optics but everything was still a blur. Details started to whir back into his processors.

"Peh.. Prehh..." he slurred.

"Give it a moment. You're vocal subroutines are still coming back online", said the voice, whose form was becoming clearer, then suddenly came into sharp focus. Spindly, creepy, most definitely...

"... Predacon..." Csirac finally managed to get out.

"Of sorts", replied the slender, purple Predacon, before giving a metal-chilling cackle. "I am Taranachus."

"The lab... How did you know..." said Csirac, pulling himself up, as the details of the raid came back to him.

"Oh, we know a lot of things", replied Taranachus, "but that should be of no concern to you now. What you should be asking is..?" he posed, playfully. Csirac knew where Taranachus was going with this. "What do you want with me", he said. Taranachus cackled, gleefully. "Yes! A much more interesting question! One with an easy answer, really..."

Csirac was now sitting upright and again knew exactly where Taranachus was leading him. "A TransWarp cell." Taranachus cackled once again. "Yes." Taranachus turned from Csirac and returned to a control panel.

"And supposing I refuse?" Csirac asked futilely.

Taranachus gave a blunt answer. "Then I'll extinguish your Spark and extract the information I require from your data-tracks."

"We have a problem then", said Csirac. "Unless you hadn't noticed, we haven't got one to work yet."

"Yes, we watched the last launch with great interest. The finale was spectacular!" Taranachus' comment cut Csirac in what was an already open wound. "I didn't say we needed the cell to work though, did I?" he asked with a small laugh. "The explosive potential of such a device was reason enough to bring you in."

Only now did Csirac begin to worry. The Predacons had proven themselves more than proficient in the use of explosives before now. What could they possibly want to destroy with such an explosion?

Taranachus moved from the panel towards to doorway. "You have two options, the latter of which is death. I think we both know which you'll choose." The door closed solidly behind him as he left, leaving Csirac alone with his thoughts, in something of a makeshift lab.

Verno

28th February 2012, 04:00 PM

The rest of their conversation was cut short by the sound of the chamber's door unlocking. Two heavy-set goons entered, the same ones that had dumped Silverbolt in earlier. They said nothing as they stood either side of the doorway. Csirac wasn't sure if he and Silverbolt were meant to exit, but he soon had his answer, as the enormous figure of Razorclaw filled the doorway.

Csirac had only ever heard stories of the Predacon leader, but now standing before him, they seemed more like nightmares.

Silverbolt tried to stand but was still recovering from his violent capture. "Don't do it on my account", Razorclaw said to Silverbolt. "You've earnt a rest". Silverbolt's hatred towards Razorclaw was clear, but he said nothing.

"We are in the presence of our own future, Silverbolt", Razorclaw continued, but now staring squarely at Csirac. "We're no longer the pinnacle of technological wizardry. Never could we have imagined that our fate would look quite like this", Razorclaw finished, clearly in reference to Csirac's Maximal protomatter body.

"I take it you're not a fan?" asked Csirac, attempting to sound as in control as possible, but failing.

"On the contrary", came the reply. "Why else would I have tapped the rich supply of protomatter on Earth?"

"Tapped?!" Silverbolt yelled. "You blew the planet up! Killed billions of humans in the process!"

"It was a brutal planet. Always had been and was until its end", Razorclaw said simply. "And the humans? Nothing more than savages. I watched them scramble over each other, trying to get aboard evacuation ships, hoping to escape - only to be shot down by our fighters waiting in orbit".

Csirac was shocked by the casual tone of Razorclaw's words.

"Our intelligence says that you were stationed there", Razorclaw continued to Csirac. "Given your talents, and appearence, it's easy to summise that you had a hand in the creation of the protomatter technology".

"Right so far", said Csirac, uneasy under the extreme focus. "What else does it say?"

"You're a... Pacifist?" Sniggers came from the bulky Predacons at the door. Csirac was surprised they knew what it meant. "Excuse my mentioning it but we have a different name for bots like you: Target Practice". The sniggering at the door continued.

"Is that what I'm here for?" Csirac asked, gaining confidence as he became more incensed.

"No. I have a greater task for you". Csirac now knew what prey felt like. Razorclaw's stare was hypnotizing.

"And what about me?" said Silverbolt. Csirac had almost forgotten he was in the room.

"You're here just so I can see the look of terror on your face". Razorclaw gave no clarification as to what that meant as he turned to face his troops at the door. "Bring them", he said, then exited the chamber. Csirac went without a fuss. Silverbolt, however, was scuffed and paraded through the corridors of Predacon onlookers, all glaring at the captured enemy. Whatever and wherever this facility was, it was big.

"Tell me", said Razorclaw, whom Csirac found himself walking next to, "Did you ever attempt to construct a protomatter combiner?"

Answering would usually have been considered an act of treason, but given Csirac's current situation, he felt he had little choice but to answer. "No", Csirac said truthfully. "The priority was production once we'd perfected the technology".

"Pity. It will make your task all the more difficult". Csirac made to enquire about just what this task was, but Razorclaw continued. "I thought of entrusting it to one of our engineers, but to have it built by someone who knows the full capabilities of the technology, then all the better for us".

"Have what built?" asked Silverbolt before Csirac had the chance to, who was still fending off evil looks as they continued through the seeming labarynth of corridors.

"We are brothers, Silverbolt", he replied, puzzling him. "Brothers in loss. You took away mine, I took away yours".

Word of the defeat of the four other original Predacons had reached even those working in the TransWarp lab. It was met with great cheer. The death of the other Aerialbots however, that was news to Csirac - terrible news. He turned and looked at Silverbolt, who had a look of pain and anger on his face.

"I wish I was there to see them burn! A big Predacon roast!" spat Silverbolt, who earnt a solid punch to the torso for his efforts, but his head came back up with a smile on it. "We celebrated that night! Four Preds down, one to go!"

"And yet here I am, alive and well - and also the bearer of bad news", Razorclaw said as he turned to face the Autobot. They had arrived at a heavy set of doors, guarded by two enormous Predacons, so big they put the two Predacons scuffing Silverbolt to shame. Whatever was behind this door was incredibly important.

"Perhaps instead of celebrating you should have been more thorough in your work", said Razorclaw, coldly.

"What do you mean?" asked Silverbolt, who'd momentarily stopped wrestling in the grip of his handlers.

Razorclaw smiled. Csirac really wished he hadn't. "Open it", he commanded to the enormous guards.

The doors swung back to reveal a vast chasm of what seemed endless blackness. But as they entered and Csirac's optics attuned to the light, there began to emerge a blue hue to the light. They approached two vast cylinders from which the blue light was emanating. Their contents couldn't yet be made out clearly.

"While Rampage and Tantrum are lost to me..." said Razorclaw, as Csirac approached the cylinders, whose contents were now clear to everyone.

"No... NOOOO!!!" screamed Silverbolt.

"The Sparks of Divebomb and Headstrong pulse on!" boomed Razorclaw.

There, suspended in the blue liquid, we're the damaged forms of Razorclaw's two surviving Predacon brothers, hooked up to all manner of tubing and life support equipment.

"You want a new body", said Csirac, stunned by the sight.

"I want to fight beside my brothers again! I want... PREDAKING!" roared Razorclaw.

1orion2many

29th February 2012, 12:11 AM

:)Very Well written Verno, It took me a little while to get through it all but thoroughly enjoyable;):)

Verno

29th February 2012, 09:36 AM

Thanks for your time mate! They're all drafts and ideas that needed fleshing out. The stuff that I'm writing at present is closer to final drafts of the individual scenes. I'm pretty happy with the last one, it only needs a few little tweaks.

Hursticon

1st March 2012, 04:00 AM

Oh man Verno,

That chapter with Csirac & Silverbolt in the custody of the Predacons - pure awesomesauce dude! ;):cool:
The exposition, the utter frustration and helplessness all comes across superbly; I love how Razor Claw comes off wild as hell yet tempered and focussed... And poor old Csirac thought Taranachus was bad! :D

I also really liked Taranchus' rebuke: "Of sorts", coupled with his eye for differing applications of Technology - He's every bit the 'mad' scientist he was/is. :cool:
(Never really bought Scorponok as the engineer/scientist, he was a little bit lacking in... dexterity? :p)

Once again man, you've got me sold! :)

Verno

1st March 2012, 04:40 PM

Sorry to post stuff out of order, but here is this arvos offering. Enjoy.

The door of the chamber burst open and several Predacons poured in.

"Maximal! Come here!" yelled one of them.

Csirac was weary as he approached. "What's going on?" Two Predacons dumped a smoking wreck onto the floor before him.

"There's a war on! Help him!" the Predacon yelled again.

Csirac examined the body but looked at the Predacons and shook his head. "The damage is too extensive. There's nothing I can do."

"You better think of something!" came the reply, accompanied with a blaster being pointed at Csirac's chest. Silverbolt limped closer but was greeted with blasters too.

Csirac tried to explain. "His body can't support his Spark. It's beginning to rejoin the Matrx."

"Then move it!" yelled the Predacon, not taking no as an answer.

"Where?" asked Csirac.

"Those!" suggested one of the other Predacons, pointing to the three Protomatter pods against the wall.

"No", said Csirac quickly.

"Do it! Or I'll rip your Spark out and put his in!" threatened the Predacon, continuing to yell.

"Skeeto, they 're for Razorclaw, I heard him say it himself", said another Predacon. Csirac recognized him, he was at the first body display.

"What about that one?" came the suggestion, this time pointing to the pod Csirac had been working on.

Csirac began to panic. "It's... Corrupt", he lied. "I used it for parts on the first body." He hoped his ruse would be believed.

"Use that then! Where is it?" questioned Skeeto, not yelling for the moment.

"Its in storage. I'll get it!" said the Predacon from the display. He grabbed a cohort and ran from the room to retrieve it.

"Hurry!" Skeeto yelled after them.

"That won't work", said Csirac. "It needs three Sparks to function, so unless you're volunteering to get in with him..?"

Skeeto cocked his gun. "I'm not gonna tell you again, Maximal!"

"It won't-" Csirac began, but a blast narrowly missed his feet. "...Ok", said Csirac, who knew the next shot wouldn't miss.

The Predacons returned carrying the monstrous form and lay it beside the lifeless form of Magmatron. "Careful now, Maximal", sneered Skeeto in Csirac's ear as he made to open the chest cavity.

With all the delicacy he could, not helped by his shaking hands, Csirac transferred the Spark from the tattered body to the new Protomatter form. He closed the lasercore and stepped back.

Suddenly the form began to convulse wildly. Limbs flew in every direction as the Spark tried to integrate into a form that would probably tear it in three.

"What's happening? What's happening?!" demanded Skeeto.

"I don't know!" Csirac replied, he'd never seen anything like this before.

A terrifying, tormented scream came out eminated from the body's mouth. Then silence.

"Magmatron? Magmatron?!" Skeeto lent over the deathly still body but received no reply.

"I'm sorry", said Csirac.

"Sorry? Not as sorry as you will be." Skeeto was enraged at having just witnessed his commander die in front of him. He encroached suddenly on Csirac.

Silverbolt, still bearing the scars of his last fight, jumped in to protect the Maximal. "He did all he could!"

Skeeto smashed him aside. "Shut it!" he roared. He was not in a good frame of mind.

"Skeeto, I'm picking up heavy chatter", reported one of the Predacons.

Skeeto, still staring at Csirac, took a moment before answering. "Let's hear it."

The Predacon on the comms turned it up. A voice broke through the static. "...sshhhzzlaw is missing. His squad is non-responsive..."

A different voice came through. "Scouts are reporting the Autobots have launched a ship into orbit. Cinder has scrambled fighters to intercept..."

Another new voice broke in. "Where's Magmatron. I ain't taking order from that bast-..."

The communication was cut as a clear signal broke through.

"This is General Rampant. Razorclaw is dead..."

"What?!" gasped one of the Preds.

"Shut up!" yelled Skeeto.

"I am assuming command. Predacon forces are to regroup at the incoming coordinates before we restart the push. General Cinder has ordered a strike on the Autobot ship. I repeat, Razorclaw is dead. I have taken command of the Predacon forces..."

"Shut it off", barked Skeeto over the top of the transmission.

"We gotta get back out there", said a Predacon.

"Shut up!" was the reply from Skeeto, his processors racing.

"Magmatron is dead, Skeeto", another continued.

The events were unfolding too quickly for Skeeto to keep track of. "I said Shut up! Shut AAARRRRRGGGHHHH!!"

*Booom!*

In his frustration, Skeeto took aim at the fourth Protomatter pod and blew it to pieces.

"Noooo!" screamed Csirac.

Skeeto turned back to Csirac. "This is your fault! You killed him!"

"Get away from him!" yelled Silverbolt who was having trouble getting back up.

"You killed him, but he ain't gonna die alone down here!"

*Booom*

Csirac crumbled to the floor, half his torso missing.

"Get out of here! Go!" he yelled to the Predacons, before turning back to the carnage. "Enjoy watching another pal die, Bolt!" he yelled, before running from the room.

"You fracking piece of slag!" Silverbolt yelled after him."Csirac!" Silverbolt crawled to him and turned him over.

"A ship... They've launched a ship"' Csirac muttered, cradling his wound.

"Don't move. I'll get you patched up", said Silverbolt, looking around for anything that could help.

"Don't... worry", said Csirac, with a grimace.

"Csirac... The pod. Venus..." said Silverbolt, looking at the debris.

"It's alright. I think it's time we got you into your new body."

Verno

2nd March 2012, 11:48 AM

The next post is a bit trashy, but not bad for a 1st draft.

----------

Optimus Prime found himself on the frontline once again. Ion blaster in one hand, Energon Axe emanating from the other, Optimus was in close combat, shredding Predacons big and small. He locked his axe with the sword of an approaching Predacon, as a voice yelled from behind a pile of rubble that was once a building.

"Suck this, Prime!"

An Energon grenade landed at the feet of the two locked in combat. Prime disengaged and dove for cover as the grenade exploded, obliterating the Predacon. Prime was hurled away by the detonation and landed in a shattered mess of his own parts and those of others. He was heavily wounded.*

The left side of his body had worn the brunt of the damage. His left leg in tatters, his left arm completely gone, and great chunks of metal torn from his chest and head. The only grace was that his blaster had landed within reach. He grasped its handle but didn't have the strength left to lift it.

A band of Predacons encroached, laughing as they saw the mess that was the Autobot leader.

"Watch him die, boys..." said one of them. "Nice and slow."

From behind where Optimus had landed, a voice yelled.

"PRIIIIIIIME!!!"

A small Maximal vehicle launched overhead, transformed mid-flight and landed between Optimus and the Predacon, unleashing a barrage of firepower at the Predacons. The Matrix pulsed within Prime's chest.

The small Maximal scattered the Predacons who had no cover out in the open, but then his weapons jammed. The Predacons returned fire. The Maximal turned, and seeing Prime's blaster, lifter the great barrel.

"Pull the trigger, Prime!" he yelled. The blaster unleashed blast after blast, killing the Predacons as they ran.

When they had gone, only then did the Maximal drop the barrel of the blaster, revealing heavy Energon burns to his arms and chest. He couldn't feel them. He turned to look at Prime and only really saw him for the first time. The damage was extensive.

"Medic!.. Medic!" he yelled to the shattered battlefield. No reply came. He tapped his comm.

"Command, Prime is down! Requesting medical assistance."

A voice crackled back. "This is Command. First Aid is making for your position."

The Maximal crouched down beside Prime to see if he could patch anything up himself.

"What's your name, Maximal?" asked Prime.

"Maxim, Sir", he replied, surveying the damage.

"It's no accident that we met, Maxim. The Will of Primus is-"

"Yeah, I bet", he cut across him. "Listen, we can talk beliefs later. Right now we've gotta get you out of here."

"Prime?" came a yell from a distance away.

Maxim stood at the top of the bunker.

"First Aid! Here!" he signaled.

The Protoectorbot raced over and quickly began assessing the damage.

"Old friend", said Prime to First Aid.

"Not your best look, Optimus", he replied.

"Can you save him?" Maxim asked.

First Aid's expression was stern. "Not here. We have to get him to cover."

Maxim's comm broke in.*

"Maxim, picking up a large Predacon movement inbound to your location."

"Open my chest", said Prime, attempting to move his arm.

"I think the Preds have done a good enough job of that already", replied Maxim with a smile. "Can you move him by yourself?" Maxim asked First Aid, as he collected his weapons and went about unjamming them.

"Perhaps. Where are you going?" First Aid replied.

"Incoming Preds. I'll go and meet them, give you time to get him out of here", said Maxim, his eyes scanning the surrounds as the blasters came back online.

"That's suicide", said First Aid, his expression sterner than ever.

Maxim looked at Optimus. "Not today."

Maxim made to move away but Prime caught his arm. "The Matrix..." began Prime.

Maxim looked straight into the optics of the great Autobot. "You hold onto it. It's the only thing keeping you alive."

Prime held his arm and *looked straight back. "Take it", said Prime. Maxim held his gaze. "What was bestowed to me I bestow to you.*Take it."

"I can't, Prime. I'm not worthy", said Maxim, unable to believe what he was hearing.

"Neither was I." Prime released his grip on Maxim and opened the remaining intact panel on his chest. With one hand he removed the ancient artifact and passed it to the Maximal.*

Everything was consumed in a white light.

"A new Age needs a new Prime", Optimus' voice echoed.

"Arise, Maximus Prime, and usher in the Peace."

A commlimk broke in.

"Maxim, report! Reading a massive energy discharge at your location."

As the light vanished and the world returned, Optimus and First Aid looked at the new Maximal.

"Everything... Is just Prime", said Maximus.

"I'm only borrowing it, Optimus. You'll have it back soon." He turned his head to address First Aid. "Get him out of here safely."

"Yes sir", said First Aid, who began to haul the form of Optimus back towards the Autobot line.

Maximus turned and looked towards the Predacon front. "Alright Maximus Prime - let's see what you can do!"

Hursticon

4th March 2012, 12:20 AM

Man; poor old Csirac really, really can't catch a break! :o
The picture that formed in my mind when the Protoform now baring Magmatron's Spark, began to emanate a terrifyingly tormented scream put a smile on my face from ear to ear; knowing what is occurring within that Lasercore... Maybe I'm a little twisted but I really dig that sort of thing! :D:cool:

I also like how we get to see Skeeto (Transquito?) make the sought of rash but rabid decisions that his toy really seems to imply; having the radio call come over that did I think really helps to add both gravity and action to the situation whilst also illustrating that a hell of a lot is going on outside of this room. ;):)

Maximus turned and looked towards the Predacon front. "Alright Maximus Prime - let's see what you can do!"

Squee!!! :eek::D:cool:

I think when you've refined this passage some more, it'll end up being far superior to the scene in the '86 movie, of which I'm certain you've drawn inspiration from, but I like how it's mixed with a little more of a young and wild feeling to it; if you know what I mean. ;):)

The description of Prime's mangled chassis also put a big grin on my face, it's always nice to se the big guys cop it but just hold in there - spewing arterial energon everywhere, internal injuries physically exposed to the world... yeah - Hursticon happy! :D:cool:

Verno

4th March 2012, 11:26 AM

You're one sick, twisted puppy, Hursty :p I do worry that the story is somewhat action-less, so when it does pop up, it has to be good! It's way too wordy as well at present.

Yes, Skeeto is an earlier version of Transquito, nicely picked up on! I was attempting to throw in a few of his loyal troops from The Gathering. I figured they'd have been around for a while.

1 Spark, 3 bodies... Ouch.

Yeah, I've only ever seen a Prime pass the Matrix on once, so I had to try and make the situation grave enough in order for it to warrant passing on.

I wrote the scene with Ratchet as the medic, but then remembered he didn't survive TF:TM, so had to change him. First Aid kent really roll off the tongue that well so I'll see if I can find another Autoot medic, but if I can't, I'll just make one up.

Maximus Prime is my, western, version of Big Convoy. He needs a bit of work, he's a bit too chatty at present where as he should be a little more quiet and stoic.

But beating the piss out of Prime was fun :p

Hursticon

4th March 2012, 09:30 PM

It's extremely entertaining stuff Verno so keep it up! :D:cool:

Indeed I'm a little twisted but as a kid, those scenes were very akin to the scenarios I'd play out with my figures - I wouldn't actually break them physically, all the damage was mental (In more ways than one :p), but this image (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_9lSwJ-jeXxQ/TI55SSrX-CI/AAAAAAAABSU/b9o--QQKlaE/s1600/optimus-prime-zombie.jpg) has remained in my head since I was about 4. :cool:

Magmatron's scene just really plays to my Sci-fi interests in 'souls' and the digitising of them; the Spark is very much a physical manifestation of this and the idea of it being split over 3 separate entities I find to be really engaging, very much like how Rampage's spark was split then genetically modified with Dinobot's DNA in order to give rise to Dinobot II. ;):cool:

The whole subject of Sparks and their biological, mystical & physical make-ups fascinates me greatly and there is such rich tapestries of lore that could be woven from them that have yet to be really explored IMO - That's why I really like your tying of them to the G1 reference of Laser-cores. :D

Verno

5th March 2012, 10:00 AM

but this image (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_9lSwJ-jeXxQ/TI55SSrX-CI/AAAAAAAABSU/b9o--QQKlaE/s1600/optimus-prime-zombie.jpg) has remained in my head since I was about 4. :cool:

Believe it or not mate, but I had the same image in my head when writing the scene!

Magmatron's scene just really plays to my Sci-fi interests in 'souls' and the digitizing of them; the Spark is very much a physical manifestation of this and the idea of it being split over 3 separate entities I find to be really engaging, very much like how Rampage's spark was split then genetically modified with Dinobot's DNA in order to give rise to Dinobot II. ;):cool:

The whole subject of Sparks and their biological, mystical & physical make-ups fascinates me greatly and there is such rich tapestries of lore that could be woven from them that have yet to be really explored IMO - That's why I really like your tying of them to the G1 reference of Laser-cores. :D

It's still a pretty ambiguous subject, Sparks, but we can make some connections to G1 and some of its terminology. I see laser cores as some kind of housing or conduit for the Spark, through which information is passed back and forth, as well as energy and personality.

I'm an atheist myself so the idea of souls is a foreign one to me, but I can understand the connection.

They're shards of Primus' essence according to something I read, but the interesting bit is that Larry and Bob intended to make Sparks some kind of shard of the Vok instead. I would love to know what they intended with that idea.

In the episode Other Visits part 1 or 2, when anyone Transmetal wasn't recognized as a foreign object by the ship, I think that was the beginning of this idea for them. In the Transmetal process, something occurred to their Sparks as well. But that's only guessing on my part.

But yes, Sparks are a delicious subject and have been far from completely covered in the fictions this far.

1orion2many

6th March 2012, 08:43 PM

Oh the horror, Prime can't go up in a grenade explosion it's not Heroic enough, He should be overwhelmed, Maxim could take them by suprise to explain being able to overrun the Preds where Prime couldn't;):) Still enjoying the read though:D

Verno

7th March 2012, 03:26 PM

Don't worry, Optimus lives to fight another day. Do you have any ideas for a better name for a medic?

While you're thinking, here's an unrelated but equally as important scene.

----------

Csirac placed a hand upon the device propped up against the wall. "I'm sorry", he said quietly.

"For what?" asked Silverbolt, who seemed far too cheerful for someone who'd just lost a limb.

Csirac hadn't been directing his apology to him, but answered anyway. "Many things."

"Are you going to tell me what that thing does?" queried Silverbolt, looking at the device.

"Nothing, now", said Csirac. "Without the Protoforms it's useless." Csirac took a seat at the table as Silverbolt lay on the floor looking skyward.

"I'd give anything to be out there right now, flying circles around some ex-'Cons", said Silverbolt. Csirac only realized for the first time how cramped Silverbolt must have felt in this room.*"You said Venus was a pilot", Silverbolt continued. "I bet she's out there kicking some Pred exhaust. Those Maximal Fighters are-"

"Venus is dead", said Csirac, surprising even himself. "I killed her."

"What?" said Silverbolt, sitting up.

"She'd volunteered to be the test pilot for the Lexor. I couldn't dissuade her - she had complete faith in my work and it cost her everything", said Csirac, staring into nothing. "She died in the TransWarp explosion that consumed the ship. And it was my fault."

"You can't blame yourself for an accident - a tragedy", assured Silverbolt.

"I can if you can", said Csirac.

"That's different. I gave an order, they followed it and they were killed", said Silverbolt, sternly. "Their deaths are on my account."

"And hers is on mine", Csirac replied, finally looking at Silverbolt. "And I couldn't live with that. That's where the ..." Csirac gestured to the device, "thing, came in."

"What are you saying?" asked Silverbolt, concerned.

"TransWarp technology works, however it's far from efficient. The firing cell tears a hole in the fabric of Time, leading to what we've named 'TransWarp Space', but in reality, is something much more. TransWarp Space is home to the many who are of the one. We'd touched the very edge of the Allspark."

"Incredible", said Silverbolt, captivated.

"The device is a... Laser Core Amplifier", said Csirac, "allowing me to stretch the link between Spark and core consciousness. Utilizing a *wave of Trans-Ions, I'd travel through the tear, find her Spark and bring it back. But now I'll never know if it would have worked."

Silverbolt's face fell with the realization. "The fourth pod. It's for her."

Csirac nodded. "The tear. That was the flaw in the plan."

"You need another ship to fire a cell", said Silverbolt, now comprehending the sheer scale of Csirac's plan. "But that could still happen! They could be doing it right now!" he added, excitedly.

"But I'm in here, how would I know for sure?", said Csirac, bursting Silverbolt's bubble. "That part was always in the hands of Primus."

The door of the chamber unlocked and opened. A Predacon rushed in and dumped four Protopods on the floor. "With compliments of Razorclaw. Something to help take your mind off the death of your friends", he said with a sneer across his face. He turned and ran to join his comrades.

"Maybe Primus is listening", said Silverbolt with a smile.

"Maybe he is", agreed Csirac, unable to believe what he had just seen.

Verno

12th March 2012, 02:18 PM

I'd love to get people's thoughts on Csirac's last scene.

----------

(30?)
[From Spotlight: Csirac]

The new body was incredible. Though now dwarfed by most of the enemy combatants, the body�s twin swords and wingtip-mounted launchers had proven themselves an ample armoury to cut down the Predacons who had tried to enter the chamber; aided in no small part by the sheer speed of the form. The shoulder-mounted jets could propel the form up to head height for an attack, and then swiftly carry the form around to avoid the counterblows. The bodies were beginning to pile up in the doorway.

As Silverbolt engaged a poorly designed Proto-sized Predacon, a burst of ions hammered into the amplifier. The Predacon was distracted by the spectacle and Silverbolt didn�t require a second invitation. He cut the Predacon down with ease, scattering limbs to all parts of the room.

Csirac had returned from his journey and was struggling to open the amplifier�s hatch. Silverbolt helped it up as Csirac tried to stand but fell to the floor. Silverbolt sat him up against the machine.

�They�re coming�, said Csirac, with pained smile.

�They?� asked Silverbolt.

�Friends�, said Csirac. �Soon.�

�We�re going to get you out of here�, said Silverbolt, moving to lift Csirac up, but a Decepticon-sized Pred thundered into the room. Silverbolt turned and engaged him with full force.

Csirac could feel his Spark fading, but had more to tell Silverbolt. He looked up to see a Proto-Pred enter the room, but Silverbolt had his back to the door, still battling the larger enemy. The small Pred ran up behind Silverbolt with an axe in both hands raised above his head ready to bring down on him, but suddenly felt his own skull disintegrate as a laser blast ripped through it. Silverbolt heard the noise just as he brought down the larger Predacon, and turned to find the source of the blast. There, at the foot of the amplifier, was Csirac, unsteadily holding a blaster, plucked from the hand of a dead Predacon. Csirac�s arm fell back to the floor, the blaster falling from his grasp.

Silverbolt stood there, stunned by Csirac�s actions. Silverbolt sheathed his swords and went to Csirac�s side. �We�re even�, said Csirac, without looking up.

�That�s twice you�ve saved me now�, said Silverbolt. �If I�m to keep us even I�ve gotta get you out of here.�

�I said I wanted to die looking at the stars�, said Csirac. �I can see them. I�ve seen what�s beyond them. I can see Venus. I�ll be with her.�

�Csirac�� began Silverbolt, but he didn�t know what to say.

Csirac looked up and deep into Silverbolt�s optics. �After they come through, promise me you�ll destroy it.�

�I will�, said Silverbolt.

�Thank you, Silverbolt�, said Csirac, his Spark flickering. �You�re the bravest Maximal I�ve ever met.� With that, Csirac�s head dropped slowly to his chest and he went offline for the last time.

�Thank you, Csirac�, said Silverbolt, bowing his own head. �Be at peace.�

Hursticon

14th March 2012, 09:01 AM

Csirac's last scene dude is great, I think it'll have even greater impact when it is actually placed at the end of his Spotlight novel. ;):)

It has the right amount of action, drama, dialogue & atmosphere, knowing what has transpired previously to this scene, I think it is quite cool that in his final moments he uses a firearm to blow a Pred's head to smithereens! :D
(Wouldn't this be the only time he actually uses a firearm or violence towards another? - I don't recall him doing that before :o)

I think the only thing I'd consider changing is Silverbolt's last line from:

�Thank you, Csirac�, said Silverbolt, bowing his own head. �Be at peace."

To:

�Thank you, Csirac�, said Silverbolt, bowing his own head. �Till all are one". :o

I think that'd reflect the new Maximal Silverbolt's Autobot roots, draw reference to the fact that Csirac really wanted to be reunited with Venus one way or another (Silverbolt considering this plight), whilst also making use of what I reckon is a pretty common Cybertronian expression; I'd like to hear what you think of that dude. :)

Verno

14th March 2012, 11:13 AM

Verno

15th March 2012, 12:15 PM

Here's the final chapter in the Csirac story.

-----------------

(35?)
[From Spotlight: Csirac]

A contingent of Maximal security forces accompany a group of allied analysts into the Predacon bunker, followed by the forms of Ironhide, Silverbolt, Prowl and, to his own surprise, Rhinox.

�You won�t find me in a cockpit again anytime soon�, said Rhinox as he entered the ruins of the chamber. �I wasn�t built for flying.�

�I know the feeling�, said Ironhide, as he left to help some other Maximals remove debris.

Rhinox looked around the dilapidated room. �Is he still here?�

�No�, said Silverbolt. �I had his body moved to the temporary Mausoleum.�

�He is most deserving of a statue�, said Prowl, also removing debris, �but the full details of what he did, and how, must remain secret.�

�We�re told you worked closely with him on the TransWarp technology. Therefore you have the best chance of understanding his work here�, said Silverbolt, who nodded to an Autobot who brought forth the amplifier. Rhinox began to study it.

�I promised Csirac I�d destroy it � a task I now pass to you�, said Silverbolt. �Pull it apart, melt down its components. But in doing so, I want you to figure out how it works.�

Rhinox looked up from the device to Silverbolt. �No offence, but I don�t think that�s exactly what he meant�, said Rhinox.

A Maximal analyst was scanning the room and came to a large pile of rubble. His equipment started to beep. �Sir, I�m detecting a large Predacon energy sig-�

An immense form erupted from the pile of rubble, sending the small Maximal flying. Magmatron had somehow survived the Spark Transfer process, and announced his return with an enormous scream.

�RRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!�

Hic circuitry burning and unsure where he was, his optics fell to those in the room, all of which his sensors detected as Maximal.

�Predacon, stand down!� ordered Prowl. Ironhide, with weapons drawn, stepped in front to protect his fellow Maximals.

Magmatron was outnumbered, which left only one option: fight!

�The Predacon Generals have signed an official notice of surrender!� shouted Silverbolt.

Magmatron smashed Ironhide aside with one swipe.

Everyone watched Ironhide crash into the wall. Prowl gave him one last warning. �Any further actions will be in direct violation of the ceasefire! Stand down!�

Magmatron�s processors were still whirring, his Spark still in incredible pain. He didn�t know who these �bots were but they wouldn�t stand in his way. He drew out an enormous sword and made to engage the remaining Maximals. He took one step forward, but suddenly began to take heavy fire. His optics couldn�t focus on the attacker, and the sound of the weapons-fire was echoing around the room, disorientating his sensors. Unable to protect himself, he lashed out wildly, but the damaged began to toll on his body and he fell back to the ground in a smoking heap.

Maximal security troops surrounded him with weapons drawn, but it had not been them that had fired. All optics looked for the source of the torrential gunfire.

There, with a large, smoking Chain gun in each hand, was Rhinox, who had a look of surprise on his face, which gave way to a cheeky smile. �Not too shabby.�

Hursticon

15th March 2012, 01:55 PM

She needs a bit of work, but that's the skeleton of the scene. I think the firing of the gun has to play more of a part in the scene, because Csirac is in essence going against his own morals in killing the Predacon.

You're probably right about the 'at peace' line. I've always found the 'Til all are One' line a tad corny, but I'm could always use 'be at One' or something like that.

As a bonus, here is the scene directly after the previous. The arrival of some old friends!

*snip*

That's the very thought I got out of Csirac's firing of that weapon, it's significance is certainly there (Having read previous scenes ;)) and whilst I think you'll probably find a way of writing it with a bit more 'bang' perse (Not that it necessarily needs it though IMO :)), I think this sort of scene probably lends itself better to a visual conveyance but again that's not to say that it does work in writing either; The moment has a power and weight to it that's for sure. ;):)

Yeah, 'Til All Are One' may sound a little corny nowadays but it still works IMO but I think you are right in that you might be able to put a more modern twist on the phrase; sort of like an evolution of it like 'Hi' is to 'Hello' if you catch my meaning. :cool:

---

I'm assuming this chapter is another skeleton? :o

I like how it plays out and I think it serves it's purpose wells but my only concerns are that the arrival of Ironhide's and Prowl's sparks into their new forms and the later subsequent initial merging of the 3 old blokes feel a little... flat? - I think that's the word I'm looking for. :)

I think these 2 areas need a little more bolstering to their weight, in that I feel that the Sparks arrival should have a little bit more of a description of the scene - Like how you described Magmatron's spark being placed into his new bodies and the subsequent stress, strain and awakening that occurs...

I hope I'm getting across what I'm trying to say here, like, at present it sort of reads like boom - sparks come floating down, enter their new bodies, done; like a microwave heating noodles you hit start, a bit of whirring, 'ping' and done you know what I mean?

The 1st combining of the 3 seems sort of abrupt and 'Righty-'o let's go' too, especially as they're 'fresh out of the oven' so to speak but more to the point it sort of feels like the moment needs more gravity to it as well, like again more of a description going into the actual process of combing and how it feels for 2 out of 3 old guys who've never known/experienced the sensation/process before. ;)

Also, how do they know that they can combine?

Do they get a feeling like another sense when they're near each other or is it like an icon sitting on their HUD saying 'Execute Magnaboss'?, but also how are you looking to tackle the whole gestalt thing? - i.e. do their consciousnesses merge to form an new individual comprised of the melding facets of each component spark?

At present, the way they talk to each other after the process sort of comes off a bit 'Voltron-y' if you know what I mean; sort of like how one pilot controls the arms, another the legs and the last controlling the head and finishing move. :o:p

But this is why I get the feeling that this is only a skeleton/draft of the scene and not the finished product. ;):o

Also, I think you've got a great opportunity to explore the whole combining thing in a new light with the newer, slightly more biological aspect of a Maximal/Predacon gestalt.
In that one thing that has never really been ventured into (as far as I know), when it comes to a Combiner forming a new entity comprised of more than 1 individual, is what that exactly does to the individual's psyche and mental state after the separation; having shared the thoughts, knowledge, memories and emotional differences from each other and then suddenly having all those things literally ripped away once reverting to individuals but also how physically taxing it could be to perform the 'Higher' function.

I'd imagine that a great many of the flaws would've been ironed out since the original Autobot/Deception combiners and that the inheritance of the original Predacons unification of Predaking being so fearfully perfect could be manifested in a sort of biological fashion, possibly in an evolutionary way with the whole Autobot-Maximal/Decepticon-Predacon upgrading, or in a technological way whereby Csirac 'off-screen' perfecting the process and hence implementing it; but because it's such an insanely effective and ludicrously potent weapon now, the Tech/Ability is then limited to only Magmatron (Though derivative), Magnaboss and Tripreducs (Who I'm really lokking forward to seeing how that whole thing comes about! :D) - from which point it's banned or lost/destroyed.

...Sorry Verno, I meant to just give you my thoughts on this chapter and have ended up going on a total tangent :rolleyes::p - I also hope I haven't been scathing on what appears to be a draft of this chapter. :o

Here's the final chapter in the Csirac story.

*snip*

That, was friggin' awesome man! and an absolutely perfect way to cap off an excellent and entralling story! - With the beginning of a new one! :D:D:D
(Don't change a bloody thing with it! ;):cool:)

I very much like how the last chapter brings to a forefront the major factors to come out of Spotlight: Csirac, In:

The Amplifier
Transswarp Tech
Magmatron's tortured resurrection
The Rebirth of Prowl, Ironhide and Silberbolt; resulting in bringing about the fabled Magnaboss
The rise of Rhinox!

Not having read any of the 'Official' spotlight series of comics myself, although I know they're 'in continuity' short stories focusing on specific characters - I'm not sure if this is a technique used at the end of them but regardless I think you've penned an excellent capping to a wonderful script. ;):)

So, although I know you've got multiple threads leading from this that could go in many directions and following many characters, I get the feeling that the next Bot of focus that'd lead on from Csirac's story is Rhinox yeah? :D

Verno

15th March 2012, 03:03 PM

See, this is what I'm after - Critical Feedback!

That's the very thought I got out of Csirac's firing of that weapon, it's significance is certainly there (Having read previous scenes ) and whilst I think you'll probably find a way of writing it with a bit more 'bang' perse (Not that it necessarily needs it though IMO ), I think this sort of scene probably lends itself better to a visual conveyance but again that's not to say that it does work in writing either; The moment has a power and weight to it that's for sure.

You have no idea how much I wish I could draw, Hursty :p The facial expressions and relationships between characters are hard to get across just in text, though good writers do it easily and make the rest of us look fools, but the scene does need work, as do they all. I've slipped a line into one of the scenes that 'warriors win wars' for Csirac, as he comes to accept that his passive attempts at ending the war have failed.

I like how it plays out and I think it serves it's purpose wells but my only concerns are that the arrival of Ironhide's and Prowl's sparks into their new forms and the later subsequent initial merging of the 3 old blokes feel a little... flat? - I think that's the word I'm looking for

Definitely flat. It needs a bit of vim, and again I'm probably relying on the imagery in my head to do the hard work in adding the spectacle to the scene, but for the readers at home, they don't have that.

Also, how do they know that they can combine?

I'm not going to lie, it's an issue I've not given a lot of thought to. I've been too preoccupied with actually getting to this part of the story and finishing it off to actually come up with a coherent and logical explanation for how they operate. But it is definitely an issue that needs resolving.

I'll have to hit the Wiki up for info about previous combiners, but at the end of the day, being a new technology and a new type of combination (ie non-Scramble city style) I'll most likely have to write my own rules here.

They are all skeletons at present, but I'm hoping the crux of the story is communicated at present. Having said that, some scenes really need trimming down, and some need fattening up.

Don't worry about tangents mate, I go off on them all the time when I'm writing. That's how I've ended up with Optimus Primal in this story meeting Rhinox. Stay tuned for that.

So, although I know you've got multiple threads leading from this that could go in many directions and following many characters, I get the feeling that the next Bot of focus that'd lead on from Csirac's story is Rhinox yeah?

Believe it or not mate, apart from Rhinox flying with the MAD Wing during the final battle of the Great War (which I'm about to write), that's it for the big guy until we see him in BW.

I've got plans for a couple more Spotlight-esk stories. (I only called them Spotlights because I was hoping people might see the title and give it a read). They are:

Dinobot
Depth Charge
Tarantulas

Once they're written, the plan then is to kill Primus and usher in TransTech. After that, I can rest.

Having said that, I started writing these stories in 2007. So give me a decade and I'll hopefully be done :p

Verno

16th March 2012, 01:15 PM

The following scene follows Csirac first being shot.

It contains Time Travel. I hope it makes sense.

Enjoy:

----------

The MAD Wing burst through the thin atmosphere of Cybertron and found a safe orbit. The ride up had been turbulent to say the least.

�I was crazy to put my hand up for this�, said Rhinox, his large form snug in the Maximal fighter cockpit.

�The word you�re looking for is MAD!�, said Primal.

�You made your case quite clearly�, said a voice over the comm.

�Some would say he argued his way into the cockpit�, said another, ribbing the newest member of their Wing.

�Cut the chatter�, said Spiral, with authority. �Looks like we�ve got the jump on them, let�s make the most of it. Wide perimeter on the Xelor. Rhinox, we are a GO!�

�Roger�, said Rhinox. �Powering up the TransWarp engine.�

�MAD Wing, optics sharp. If this works the ship could pop out anywhere�, said Spiral. �Prepare for defensive evac or fast recovery of the Ball.�

�Primal to Rhinox. How�s it coming?�

�Lights are green. TransWarp cell to 78% power.�

�This is it �bots�, said Spiral, addressing the Wing. �You all know what happened last time, and you�re all here voluntarily. You�re the bravest pilots I�ve ever had the privilege to fly with. Let�s see this through to its end.�

�MAD Wing!� came the call from the pilots over the comm.

�Cell to 100%. Engaging TransWarp Drive in 3� 2� 1� Now!� A rippled window in Space opened up and engulfed the Xelor.

**2 minutes earlier**

�I was crazy to put my hand up for this�, said Rhinox, his large form snug in the Maximal fighter cockpit.

�The word you�re looking for is MAD!�, said Primal.

�You made your case quite clearly�, said a voice over the comm.

�Some would say he argued his way into the cockpit�, said another, ribbing the newest member of their Wing.

�Cut the chatter�, said Spiral, with authority. �Looks like we�ve got the jump on them, let�s make-� *Woom Woom* The rest of Spiral�s words were cut off by an alarm. �Detecting an anomaly, Sector 159!�
�Energy signature matches the Xelor!� came a voice over the comm.

�This is Rhinox, reporting successful test! But systems are beginning to short out. The Cell must have overload�� Rhinox was suddenly plunged into darkness. The whole ship had lost power. �Oh no��

�Blue Feathers, stay with the Xelor until entry, then regroup�, commanded Spiral. �All remaining Feather, recapture the Ball!�

Ships broke off and headed for Sector 159 at full steam.

�Spiral to Autobot Command. Reporting a successful TransWarp Test. Awaiting further orders?�

�This is Command. Maintain safe orbit and stay out of troub� Scratch that. Receiving reports that Cinder has diverted a squad of fighters to intercept. They�re in bound, and fast. Protect that ship with your Sparks!�

�Roger, Command. You heard the �bot downstairs: Nothing gets through us!�

Rhinox sat in the Xelor, now with only the four Blue Feathers for company, but his optics were glued to the dial, watching the power climb upwards, until it reached the top. �Cell to 100%. Engaging TransWarp Drive in 3� 2� 1� Now!� A rippled window in Space opened up and engulfed the Xelor, again.

�This is Blue Feathers, he�s away!�

�Roger that. Regroup and prepare to engage incoming Predacon ships!�

Verno

16th March 2012, 01:22 PM

The following scene comes after Csirac dies.

It also contains Time Travel so I hope it makes sense.

Enjoy:

----------

�They�re drawing us away from the Xelor�, came the voice of Scuttle through the comm.

�Dammit, he�s right�, said Spiral, looking out the cockpit�s side window. �Break off pursuit and reform.�

�Single Predacon fighter, emerging from the atmosphere. He's making for the Xelor!�, came a worried voice.

Inside the Predacon fighter, the figure spoke to itself in a deep, calm voice. �I have target lock. Terminator, firing.�

�Single missile inbound!� yelled Scuttle on the comm.

�I can get there!� replied Primal, whose engines were burning flat-out to try and intercept. �I can� get� there��

*Boom*

Primal�s ship collided with the missile, saving the Xelor.

�Primal!� yelled Rhinox, who had both the best and worst view of the whole thing. �Alright you damn piece of slag, let�s get you back online�, Rhinox said to the ship.

Back inside the Predacon ship, the figure smiled. �Maximal ship intercepted my missile. Scratch one for Terminator. Coming back around for another attack.�

Scuttle had left his comm. channel open. �I can�t shake him, I can�t� Aaarrghhh�� came his cries as his ship erupted in a ball of momentary flame.

�Dammit, they�re picking us off like flies�, said Spiral. His computer gave a warning. *Enemy Lock* �Great�, he said as he pulled on the stick, attempting to break lock. �Can anyone cover me? Anyone?�

�Look who�s back�� said a familiar voice over the communicator.

�Wha�? Primal?� said Spiral, jerking his head around to try and get a visual.

�And feeling Prime!�

*Boom*

The Predacon ship that had been tailing Spiral was blown to pieces, as another Predacon ship flew through the smoke. There, sitting in its cockpit, whose windscreen was shattered, was Primal, alive and well.

�How in the Pit..?� began Spiral, pulling alongside Primal�s new ship.

�Later�, said Primal. �Let�s give these Preds something else to think about!�

�Roger that�, said Spiral, taking the lead. �Form up on my wing.�

The two ships re-entered the fray. Somehow the Xelor was still in one piece.

�Primal to the Xelor. Rhinox, if you�re there, we�ve bought you some time, but we won�t last much longer, so whenever you�re ready, kick it!�

In the cockpit of the Xelor, Rhinox was busily trying to do whatever he could to get the ship back online. �Damn it�, he said as the controls sparked. �Would you just work!� he yelled, and smashed the control panel with his fists. Suddenly the ship roared back to life. He didn�t know how long it would last so he quickly re-entered the information into the on board computer. �Xelor to whoever is left. Ship is back online. Engaging TransWarp Drive in 4� 3� 2� 1� Now!� A rippled window in Space opened up and engulfed the ship.

*5 minutes earlier*

�They�re drawing us away from the Xelor�, came the voice of Scuttle through the comm.

�Dammit, he�s right�, said Spiral, looking out the cockpit�s side window. �Break off pursuit and reform.�

�Single Predacon fighter, emerging from the atmosphere. He's making for the Xelor!�, came a worried voice.

Inside the Predacon fighter, the figure spoke to itself in a deep, calm voice. �I have target lock. Terminator, firing.�

�Single missile inbound!� yelled Scuttle on the comm.
�I can get there!� replied Primal, whose engines were burning flat-out to try and intercept. �I can� get� there��

*Boom*

Primal�s ship collided with the missile, saving the Xelor.

�Primal!� yelled Rhinox, who had both the best and worst view of the whole thing.

Back inside the Predacon ship, the figure smiled. �Maximal ship intercepted my missile. Scratch one for Terminator. Coming back around for another attack.� As he turned the ship, something collided with the windscreen of the ship, lodging itself there. The debris, which seemed to be a Maximal, turned its head to look in.

�Permission to come aboard�, said Primal, with a smile, before drawing a sword from out of his back.

Scuttle had left his comm. channel open. �I can�t shake him, I can�t� Aaarrghhh�� came his cries as his ship erupted in a ball of momentary flame.

�Dammit, they�re picking us off like flies�, said Spiral. His computer gave a warning. *Enemy Lock* �Great�, he said as he pulled on the stick, attempting to break lock. �Can anyone cover me? Anyone?�

�Look who�s back�� said a familiar voice over the communicator.

�Wha�? Primal?� said Spiral, jerking his head around to try and get a visual.

�And feeling Prime!�

*Boom*

The Predacon ship that had been tailing Spiral was blown to pieces, as another Predacon ship flew through the smoke. There, sitting in its cockpit, whose windscreen was shattered, was Primal, alive and well.

�How in the Pit..?� began Spiral, pulling alongside Primal�s new ship.

�Later�, said Primal. �Let�s give these Preds something else to � Whoa!�

A temporal anomaly opened up directly in front of Primal and Spiral�s ships. They turned sharply to avoid it.

�Xelor to the Xelor. Give the panel a good talking to. Worked for me.�

A thud was heard over the comm. �That seems to have got it. See you on the other side. Engaging TransWarp Drive in 4� 3� 2� 1� Now!� A rippled window in Space opened up and engulfed the ship.

1orion2many

3rd April 2012, 08:30 PM

:confused:Time Travel is confusing me:p:D

Verno

3rd April 2012, 08:33 PM

I'll draw you a diagram.

Verno

4th April 2012, 10:27 AM

http://i1105.photobucket.com/albums/h357/Rh1n0x/TT.png

Ok, so the black lines represents the inevitable passage of time, both before and after the successful TransWarp test.

If we take the 2nd successful test as the example:

The black line ("They're drawing us away from the Xelor" etc, up to �Let�s give these Preds something else to think about!"), carries on into the green line (�Roger that�, said Spiral, taking the lead. �Form up on my wing.� to �Xelor to whoever is left. Ship is back online. Engaging TransWarp Drive in 4� 3� 2� 1� Now!�).

The red star at the end of the green line represents the point which Rhinox left the time-stream he was in and the beginning of his voyage backwards.

The dashed grey line are events which never in fact happen, as no one ever remembers them, except perhaps Primus.

The orange line is the unseen passage of Rhinox traveling back a few minutes to the first red star (his point of re-entry into the timeline and altering future events).

His re-entry causes the black line to shift, so instead of Primal saying "Let's give them something else to think about, we get his interrupted sentence as the ship emerges in front of he and Spiral.

So it's basically a loop-de-loop, if you follow me.

Is that any clearer?

Hursticon

8th April 2012, 09:01 PM

That diagram might indeed help dude; I really need to find some time to read the final 2 entries here. :o

1orion2many

12th April 2012, 05:27 PM

Doesn't cure senility though:p:D and I'm talking about me :D

Verno

13th April 2012, 05:15 PM

Once she's in comicbook form, I promise it'll make sense ;)

Verno

30th August 2012, 02:54 PM

I suppose many of you have been wondering how my creative endeavors have been going of late (Ha, who am I kidding...). The 1st Issue of TransWarp: Csirac is chugging along slowly. Here's a link to the Gallery of amassed Artwork (http://rh1n0x.deviantart.com/favourites/50391376) for Issue #1 thus far. I'm sure you'll agree that the artwork is wonderful, and if you have a DA account, please let the artists know what you think of their work!

So with that somewhat out of my hands atm, and with my move to Sydney not going as well as I'd planned (basically unable to get approval for a place up there) I've had plenty of time for writing. So I thought I'd share some of what I've been working on, namely my Deicide story, which takes place post-Beast Wars and negates Beast Machines, Woo!

Here we go:

Tarantulas, deep in his lair, studied the fluctuating data on the screens in front of him as the beam emitter continued to fire on the now offline form of Tigerhawk suspended against the wall. �Something is wrong�, said Tarantulas, who turned to see the dual-skulled form of the Vok advancing on him. He gave a scream as they snaked closer.

�No! Stay away from me!� he cried, firing his shoulder-mounted cannons. The blasts passed through the Vok and struck the emitter, which was knocked off its target and spun towards Tarantulas. Tarantulas continued to fire as the Vok entered his body.

Tarantulas screamed, only to look up and see the emitter swing to face him. The beam reengaged and fired, sending him hurtling into his own equipment. Pinned by the energy beam, Tarantulas wailed as the Vok attempted to depart his body, but they too were pinned.

With one final blood-curdling scream, Tarantulas was overwhelmed by the energy pulse and exploded!

(If you're wondering why that's so familiar, it's from Other Victories, Beast Wars Season 3, Episode 11, but it's a very important scene in the scheme of the story. Read on!)

-----------------

The entity felt itself pulled in every direction; buffeted, pushed, until landing squarely on what appeared to be nothing at all. Looking up, it was greeted with an endless sheet of black, flecked with colour.

�Location?� it asked. �Unknown�, was its own reply, as it studied the sea of ink.

�That�� said a voice, surprising the Entity, who spun around to discover a golden figure standing with its hands folded behind its back, �� is the breadth of all creation�. The figure was smiling whilst looking out into the speckled blackness.

�You are�� began the Entity. The golden figure met its gaze. �Yes, I am Primus. It is a great honour to finally meet you, my Son.� Primus studied the figure before him. �Your form has changed repeatedly since your creation, and drastically so � as such I know not what to call you now�, said Primus, still smiling.

The Entity took in its new guise � solid, yet not a physical existence. �We are the Vok�, it said, unsure of its own words.

�We?� asked Primus. �A single voice, for a single mind; no longer divided but united into one Being.� Primus moved up beside the figure, returning his eyes to the dark expanse. The Entity was still grappling with itself. �A name will come�, Primus said with assurance. �The more important matter is why you are here.�

Primus brought his hands from behind his back. Cupped in them was a single glowing orb. �This is the Spark of the one you know as Tarantulas�, said Primus, now studying the pulsating globe.

The name snapped the attention of the Entity away from its own form and onto the Spark. �A vile creature�, it said with disdain.

�From the moment of your creation you have sought an answer to the greatest of all questions. My hope was that you would discover the answer on your own, but Time, and circumstance, have been against us.� The Entity�s eyes were transfixed on the Spark. �Tarantulas� demise provided me with an opportunity to bring you here, to fulfil your quest for understanding.�

To the Entity�s surprise, Primus handed it the Spark.

�Tarantulas walked a difficult path, made so by the abuses of subsequent and ever darker masters.� The Entity was uncomfortable with the Spark in its hands. �Their influence twisted his perception of the Universe, and thus his own attempts at understanding were as equally warped.�

�His fate?� asked the Entity.

�Lies now in your hands�, said Primus simply. �Destroy him. There is no denying that his actions have been to the detriment of many others.�

�Or?� the Entity asked, returning Primus� stare.

�He will return to the Allspark, unable to harm again�, said Primus.

�The Allspark � the eternal refuge for your creations�, said the Entity, handing the Spark back to Primus, but clearly not liking the limited options.

�Refuge, perhaps. But eternal? No�, said Primus, shaking his head. With a roll of his hand, Tarantulas� Spark vanished.

�Why have you brought us here?� the Entity asked.

�I have fought Unicron for an immeasurable time, but I believe the battle is coming to an end�, Primus replied, looking out at the cosmos.

�You wish us to join your fight?� queried the Entity.

�You have been a part of this fight your entire life. It gave rise to your creation, and will answer the question that has defined your existence�, said Primus, whose optics were once again lost in the ever-stretching expanse.

�Why were we created�, said the entity, who also turned to look out once more.

�I have seen life burst from rock on a world scorched by three suns, emerge from a planet drenched in perpetual darkness, and seemingly spring forth from the very fabric of Space itself. For countless eons I have studied these phenomena and I am still amazed by the arrival of life from nothing; with no agenda or purpose beyond simply being alive.� Before the Entity rose a metallic planet.

�But you, and your Cybertronian siblings are not of this kind; you were no fluke or accident. As much as it may appear otherwise, your creation was purposeful, and it is your seeking of purpose, your search for �why�, which has driven you from your blind beginnings to this very point.� Primus turned back to the Entity.

�To truly understand your place in the Universe, you cannot be told a story from halfway through � we must start at the beginning.� With this, a blinding light consumed everything.

(And so begins Primus� monologue. Eventually it will be accompanied by a montage of images, but let your imagination do some work for the moment)

�Much like you, my genesis was engineered�, came Primus� voice, echoing in the whiteness. �The One, an entity of immense power and understanding, had long resided here. He sought an answer to the only question remaining to him: What lay beyond existence?�

�In order to seek this answer in the next, he severed the link between his consciousness and his body of energy that radiated below in Trans-Dimensional Space. But instead of allowing his amassed energy to dissipate and return to the breadth of this reality, he split it in two, and crafted each half into a new entity.�

�Unicron and I were born with great power and intellect at our disposal, but The One did not share with us his wisdom � that we would have to find for ourselves. With this final act of creation, The One moved beyond existence.�

�Left to seek out the answers to our own questions, we soon became aware of a second reality, one unlike our own, and while I was happy to observe it through the cracks between the two realms, Unicron wished to experience this plane of physicality firsthand.�

�I attempted to dissuade him, arguing that we couldn�t know what repercussions would result from such an action, but he would not listen.�

�I was left with no choice but to attempt to restrain him, which ended in a violent battle between us, and his subsequent escape.�

�I watched on as he shifted his entire existence into the neighbouring reality, but unaware of its strange laws, Unicron was paralysed, and powerless to return.�

�He cried for help. I was unwilling to help him, and ultimately unable due to the injuries I had sustained. Even after the tear between the realities closed, his voice still echoed here. In need of time to recover, as well as to block out his screams, I slept, hoping time would silence him.�

�When I awoke, I found myself no longer in Trans-Dimensional Space, but here, on a higher, Astral Plane. What�s more, Unicron�s cries had ceased, but were now replaced by others � billions of screams, all crying out for help. I found the source of their fear, and found it to be one I soon shared with them.�

�Unicron.�

�Time had indeed silenced him, but it had also delivered him an understanding of the foreign reality, and a mastery of its laws. Now a being of true darkness, he wasn�t simply destroying life, he was wiping away creation itself.�

�He had to be stopped.�

�At the centre of a lifeless, barren planetoid I created a node; a machine through which I could act and influence the Physical reality. Because my consciousness now resided on the Astral Plane, I discovered I could transfer small portions of my Energy from Trans-Dimensional Space into Physical Space via this mechanism without fear of the paralysis that greeted Unicron.�

�The planetoid was reformatted into a world of metal, and from its surface were carved thirteen forms. Releasing small shards of Energy from my being, Sparks, they brought the forms to life. These were the first warriors in the battle against Unicron, and those I hoped would force his retreat back into Trans-Dimensional Space.�

�During the course of the War, Unicron kidnapped one of the Thirteen: Megatronus. He tortured him, turning him into a servant of Unicron�s will, then sent this twisted being, who history remembers as The Fallen, to destroy its Brothers. This betrayal, which left only one of the remaining Thirteen alive, coincided with something I had never considered possible � Unicron arrived on the Astral Plane.�

�His growing power and strength in the Physical realm catapulted his consciousness into this higher reality. So as the sole survivor, Prima, battled The Fallen below, I fought Unicron here.�

�I was still no match for my Brother. All I could now hope for was a temporary removal of his consciousness from this realm, which would only come about by the dispersal of his power below, but there, things were not going well.�

�Prima lay strewn on the ground, preparing himself to meet the end, when a light burst from his chest, enveloping everything.�

�When it subsided, Unicron had been vanquished and The Fallen had fled, both of which surprised Prima greatly, but not as much as the fact that he was still alive. He looked down to see a strange glowing artefact grasped firmly in his hands: the Matrix.�

�Through it I spoke to Prima, and told him of what had been, and of what was to come. Unicron was still alive in some fundamental form, but if he was able to regain enough power, he would once again return to the Astral Plane. A new plan had to be devised to remove Unicron from existence entirely, as it was clear that he would never stop until all of creation was wiped clean.�

�With The Matrix, Unicron�s physical form could be destroyed, but his consciousness could only be defeated here. I knew I would never be his superior in battle, so I had to create someone that was.�

�I guided Prima through a process that would release a great number of new Sparks into reality. Bodies carved from the planet�s surface were once again brought to life. Prima handed down to them my teachings, in the form of a Covenant, to guide them, and the Matrix, to defeat Unicron should he return. The process had created a second entity � a small mass of pulsating energy that drifted off into Space.�

�Prima then departed this newly populated world, upon my instructions, leaving the new beings to construct a home. They called themselves Cybertronians, and their world Cybertron � and for a time there was peace.�

�You may ask why Prima�s reward was a solitary exile from his home. I had already asked too much of him, but still I asked for more � one final task; a task that you would be well aware of had it gone to plan.�

�Having read the Covenant, Prima knew of the Xal: a warrior foretold to rise from among the mortals to pass judgement on Creation at a time called �The Transcension�. It was Prima�s task to guide the burgeoning entity on its way to ascension.�

�However, far from Cybertron, The Fallen had tracked down the diminished form of his Dark Master, and after nursing him back to a sufficient level of strength, was instructed to find Prima and do that which he had failed to do previously � destroy him.�

�Sadly for the Swarm, The Fallen succeeded, for it was at this stage that it was meant to meet Prima, and add him to its collective nature, guiding it towards its intended fate.�

(End monologue)

The white light subsided and the Entity was returned to the present. Primus� golden form was once again staring out into the cosmos.

�The Swarm?� it asked, seeking certainty. �But we were the Swarm.�

Primus smiled. �Yes, you were. And you remained the Swarm for a long time to come, longer than I had planned. Only upon your meeting with Optimus Prime and the Matrix did you finally take a turn towards becoming something more, towards what you were meant to be.�

The Entity grappled with the meaning of these words.

�We�� it began, still unsure, �are the Xal?�

�Yes, and no�, said Primus, now turning to face the Entity again. �You still have much to learn, and time is short.�

�Shorter than you think, Primus�, boomed a dark voice. The Entity was shaken, but Primus face was stern.

�Unicron?� asked the Entity, looking around as if expecting to see him.

�He is close�, sighed Primus. �The Transcension is upon us whether we are ready or not.�

-End Excerpt-

As you can see, I'm rewriting the creation story of the Transformers Universe, but doing so by mixing all existing elements with a bit of my own stuff.

It's far from a polished gem, and I'll no doubt change it quite a lot before it's done, but it's an update on what I'm currently working on.

I hope you enjoyed.

Ravagecat

6th September 2012, 12:51 PM

Nice job Verno :cool:...gave me goosebumps reading that...hope you get to finish it!

Verno

6th September 2012, 01:55 PM

Nice job Verno :cool:...gave me goosebumps reading that...hope you get to finish it!

Cheers mate, thanks for reading! Haha, and so do I!

It's the end of my Transversal Continuity story, leading into a TransTech future on Cybertron. The trouble is, the story has evolved into this War and Peace type epic. I didn't want to detail the events/battle on Cybertron that occurs concurrently with this story, but I can't help but write it!

But like all my other stories, I'll finish them off eventually, even if most of them are half finished atm :cool:

Hursticon

14th September 2012, 01:25 PM

Cheers mate, thanks for reading! Haha, and so do I!

It's the end of my Transversal Continuity story, leading into a TransTech future on Cybertron. The trouble is, the story has evolved into this War and Peace type epic. I didn't want to detail the events/battle on Cybertron that occurs concurrently with this story, but I can't help but write it!

But like all my other stories, I'll finish them off eventually, even if most of them are half finished atm :cool:

What ever you do though dude, just don't stop writing whatever comes to your mind - All the pieces can be put together at a later time, just make sure you keep adding to this awesome puzzle! ;):D

Verno

5th October 2012, 01:49 PM

Issue #1 of TransWarp: Csirac is still (very, painfully) slowly coming together, but I thought I'd share with you all a revelation I had last night about my TF writings as a whole:

If you watch Episodes IV, V and VI of Star Wars, you would be very safe to assume that the story is about Luke Skywalker and his journey to becoming a Jedi.

However, if you watch Episodes I through to VI, you suddenly realise that the story, the saga as a whole, is about Anakin Skywalker, not Luke.

So with a grand perspective over all my writings, I've written individual stories in the Transformers Universe that are about Transformers, but the saga as a whole is actually about Primus, Unicron and the Xal.

If you're wondering what the Xal is-

From the TF-TVC:

The Xal, or the Great Xal, is one prophesied to ascend from among the mortal in the time known as the Rectification, or the Transcension - a day when all Cybertronian life stops for an instant, and in that instant, the Xal must declare it worthy of continuation, or else strip it from Existence.

This day is foretold in the final pages of the Covenant of Primus, but it gives no insight into the outcome, as that is beyond the eye of even Primus himself.

The Xal is also a constellation of Stars in the shape of a Sword in the Ancient Cybertronian Zodiac.

The Xal isn't something I created. It was mentioned in G2, but I've run with and expanded the idea.

Bidoofdude

5th October 2012, 03:05 PM

Vernoverse seems like a great place/time/continuity:o:p. Really lovin' it!:D

Verno

5th October 2012, 08:28 PM

Vernoverse seems like a great place/time/continuity:o:p. Really lovin' it!:D

Cheers Mate. The Universe as a whole is still very fractured story wise, with bits and pieces all over the shop, but any questions you have about the story (from start [with The One creating Primus and Unicron] to finish [with the Transcension and the TransTech Revolution]) I'm happy to answer.

Hursticon

7th October 2012, 01:10 PM

I'm intrigued by this "Xal" facet you've decided to incorporate dude, curious to see how you weave it into the Vernoverse; As for Issue #1 of Transwarp: Csirac, slow & steady wins the race. ;):cool:

Verno

8th October 2012, 03:59 PM

I'm intrigued by this "Xal" facet you've decided to incorporate dude, curious to see how you weave it into the Vernoverse; As for Issue #1 of Transwarp: Csirac, slow & steady wins the race. ;):cool:
Hahaha, we shall see, we shall see...

Verno

11th October 2012, 12:47 PM

I just thought I'd share something with you all again.

I've been constructing the Transversal Continuity for quite a while. I started writing (what has become) the TVC in 2007, and over that time, I've killed a lot of trees:

http://i1105.photobucket.com/albums/h357/Rh1n0x/Random/121011-115709_zps672f687b.jpg

And will kill more before I'm through! Typing is fine, but I find scraping a pen across a page is quite therapeutic.

Anyway.

Last night I wrote down all the story ideas, conceptualised and not, in order to see where I'm at in the grand scheme of things. Here's what I came up with.

The TransWarp Saga: Detailing the end of the Great War.

Csirac
Ravage
Primal
Maxim

The Darkness Trilogy: The origins of the Tripredacus Council.

Gathering Darkness
Entering Darkness
Burgeoning Darkness

Dark Designs: A Pentalogy (5 parts) telling the story of the Quintessons enslavement of Cybertron and eventual rebellion that led to the 1st Golden Age of Cybertron.

Wisdom
War
Wrath
Death
Judgment

X: A Spotlight-esk story for Protoform X (Rampage) and Depth Charge. (Let's be honest - it needs doing!)

Honour: Another Spotlight, this time for Dinobot. (Also desperately needs doing)

Nexus: Explaining the links between the melded G1/2 Universe to the TransWarp era and through to Beast Wars.

Con: A Spotlight issue about the message on the Golden Disk that was the catalyst for the Beast Wars.

The Golden Disks: A working title. Did you ever wonder why the two Golden Disks that appeared in Beast Wars were so similar in size and appearance? Answer - there was never only two...

Earth: The story of Human participation in the Great War, and how they lost.

Of those 19 stories: 6 are written in entirety, 2 are nearing completion, 4 are in random pieces, notes and scribbles, and the remaining 7 aren't past the conceptual stage.

All in all, I'm a long way from done...

And I have mixed feelings about that fact.

This foray into Comics that I'm attempting with the Csirac story has given me a taste of having my work illustrated. A year ago I would have written them all as prose pieces, but let's be honest, no one read fan fiction, but everyone is willing to cast their eye across some Artwork from time to time.

For all the writing I've done in these past 6 years, it seems I'm not very far along in the scheme of things and the end seems a long way away.

But for now I'll keep writing, and hoping I can find Artists willing to help me out with some artwork from time to time.

As Furman so eloquently put it - It never ends...

Hursticon

11th October 2012, 07:25 PM

KalEl

11th October 2012, 07:36 PM

I just thought I'd share something with you all again.

I've been constructing the Transversal Continuity for quite a while. I started writing (what has become) the TVC in 2007, and over that time, I've killed a lot of trees:

http://i1105.photobucket.com/albums/h357/Rh1n0x/Random/121011-115709_zps672f687b.jpg

And will kill more before I'm through! Typing is fine, but I find scraping a pen across a page is quite therapeutic.

Anyway.

Last night I wrote down all the story ideas, conceptualised and not, in order to see where I'm at in the grand scheme of things. Here's what I came up with.

The TransWarp Saga: Detailing the end of the Great War.

Csirac
Ravage
Primal
Maxim

The Darkness Trilogy: The origins of the Tripredacus Council.

Gathering Darkness
Entering Darkness
Burgeoning Darkness

Dark Designs: A Pentalogy (5 parts) telling the story of the Quintessons enslavement of Cybertron and eventual rebellion that led to the 1st Golden Age of Cybertron.

Wisdom
War
Wrath
Death
Judgment

Deicide: A story that bookends the TVC Universe; beginning and end.

X: A Spotlight-esk story for Protoform X (Rampage) and Depth Charge. (Let's be honest - it needs doing!)

Honour: Another Spotlight, this time for Dinobot. (Also desperately needs doing)

Nexus: Explaining the links between the melded G1/2 Universe to the TransWarp era and through to Beast Wars.

Con: A Spotlight issue about the message on the Golden Disk that was the catalyst for the Beast Wars.

The Golden Disks: A working title. Did you ever wonder why the two Golden Disks that appeared in Beast Wars were so similar in size and appearance? Answer - there was never only two...

Earth: The story of Human participation in the Great War, and how they lost.

Of those 19 stories: 6 are written in entirety, 2 are nearing completion, 4 are in random pieces, notes and scribbles, and the remaining 7 aren't past the conceptual stage.

All in all, I'm a long way from done...

And I have mixed feelings about that fact.

This foray into Comics that I'm attempting with the Csirac story has given me a taste of having my work illustrated. A year ago I would have written them all as prose pieces, but let's be honest, no one read fan fiction, but everyone is willing to cast their eye across some Artwork from time to time.

For all the writing I've done in these past 6 years, it seems I'm not very far along in the scheme of things and the end seems a long way away.

But for now I'll keep writing, and hoping I can find Artists willing to help me out with some artwork from time to time.

As Furman so eloquently put it - It never ends...

Thats freakin awesome bro!

Verno

11th October 2012, 10:18 PM

Whether it takes another 5 years dude, what you're scribing is awesome & I'll be happy to wait until they're done - Just keep chipping away at it dude, even if it has to be in Prose form; I'll be plenty happy to read these stories just in a plain written format, a comic is the icing on the cake IMO. ;):cool:

Chipping away is right. And as always, I appreciate the support Mate. But the plan for the next round of writing is in place, so I've got something to move towards.

Have you considered having them produced as published .PDFs or Digital Books? - Sky Shadow might be able to give you a couple of pointers there. :)

My fear with 'publishing' anything is Trademarks and Copyrights and so forth. I don't want to tread on any of Hasbro's toes, and I think the right of 'fair use' only stretches so far, not that I'd ever considering trying to sell any of the stories anyway. Their only value and worth is to me in reality.

Thats freakin awesome bro!

Cheers mate.

The Universe keeps expanding, there's always something more to be told.

Trent

26th November 2012, 09:54 PM

Verno

29th November 2012, 10:00 AM

Just sat down over the last 2 nights reading this thread in its entireity and I must say you are an excellent writer dude! While I do really enjoy reading I find it hard to find material that engages me but this has really done the trick and increased my admiration of the Beast Wars era, which can only be a good thing. ;)

I'm flattered you took the time to read it all mate! And I'm delighted it's increased your liking of Beast Wars - my intention when starting out writing all this stuff years ago was to strengthen the ties story-wise between G1/2 and Beast Wars.

A character that you briefly touched on earlier (in post #53, your outline for Csirac) but we have yet to see anything on (that you've shown us really) is Grimlock. You said he came back in Csirac with Prowl and Ironhide but he hasn't shown up in anything you've written. Did you end up changing your mind about including him? Or have you not developed that plot line enough? I'd love to see how you write him :)

To be honest, yes I did change my mind on Grimlock, but a character such as he won't be left alone for long - there is a climactic battle at the end of G1 during the TransWarp storyline, and Grimlock being Grimlock can't not be there :P So stay tuned, I'll find a place for Grimlock in there somewhere.

How is your comic coming along anyway? You can put me down for a copy. :)

Issue #1 of Csirac is slowly coming together, another Page should be complete today actually.

I don't know if you're familiar with Transformers: The Lost Seasons Project on DeviantART, but they've picked up TransWarp: Ravage! So those 2 Issues will get made without me doing much (if any) of the legwork.

I'll post up some links soon.

Hursticon

29th November 2012, 11:03 AM

This:

Issue #1 of Csirac is slowly coming together, another Page should be complete today actually.

...And especially this!:

I don't know if you're familiar with Transformers: The Lost Seasons Project on DeviantART, but they've picked up TransWarp: Ravage! So those 2 Issues will get made without me doing much (if any) of the legwork.

Is utterly awesome news man, congrats & well done as always! - Will be waiting for updates feverishly. :D:cool:

Verno

1st December 2012, 07:20 AM

Page 11:

http://th07.deviantart.net/fs71/PRE/i/2012/334/7/2/csirac___issue__1___page_11_by_tf_tvc-d5mlwm5.jpg

Verno

30th December 2012, 08:54 PM

Here's a little teaser for everyone...

http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/365/b/2/transformers__x___coming_soon_by_rh1n0x-d5prnp9.png

Transformers: X

That's right, I've started writing another new story.

Coming Soon.

Hursticon

5th January 2013, 06:32 PM

Ooh!... :D

Verno

6th January 2013, 12:10 PM

Here we go Hursty, a little taster of what I'm throwing around in my mind at the moment.

Transformers: X

Issue #1 - Draft

Page 1:

Note: Panels on Pages 1 and 2 swap between the past and present. They will be notated accordingly.

Panel 1.

(Present) Statek sits in his office, with his head in his hands, still distraught with the recent events.

PNL: Secret Maximal Research Facility.
Link PNL: Colony Omicron.

Dialogue PNL X: How many�

Panel 2.

(Past) In a shadowy holding cell, a large figure (obscured in the darkness) moves towards the glass at the front of the cell. There are voices shouting outside his cell, but from this far back in the cell we can�t see where the voices are coming from or who they belong to.

Dialogue PNL: Its Spark has gone into arrest!

Dialogue PNL (2): Activate life-support procedures.

Dialogue PNL (3): It�s fading quickly!

Panel 3.

(Present) Statek looks up, raising his head from his hands; his attention caught by the voice.

Dialogue PNL X: How many are you willing to sacrifice?

Panel 4.

(Past) The large figure moves closer to the front of the cell again, revealing more of the chamber outside the holding cell, but still not revealing where all the shouting is coming from.

Dialogue PNL: Stasis-Lock has failed!

Dialogue PNL (2): Prep for transfer.

Dialogue PNL (3): We�re losing it�

Page 2:

Panel 1.

(Present) Statek gets up and walks into the larger chamber and towards the shadowy holding cell, but the large figure can�t be seen in the darkness.

Dialogue PNL X: Prepared to send screaming back to the Allspark�

Statek: Please, don�t.

Panel 2.

(Past) The large figure now stands right at the front of the cell, one hand pressed up against the glass. Through the glass we can see another holding cell. In it are three Maximal scientists in a flurry of action; one of them, Statek, is clearly in charge. They are standing over an operating table. On the table is the body of a large figure. They are trying to keep the large figure on the table alive with all manner of technology and such.

Statek: Get the R-Tank!

Maximal 1: It�s too late; the Spark has begun reintegration with the Allspark.

Panel 3.

(Present) From inside the holding cell, Statek approaches it. The large figure still can�t be seen. At the far end of the chamber, behind Statek, are some large elevator doors.

Dialogue PNL X: I can hear their Sparks, calling out.

Panel 4.

(Past) From inside the holding cell with the Maximal Scientists, the large figure on the table lies motionless. Statek, at the head of the table, his hands gripping the table, is hanging his head, having lost the Spark. The two other Maximals look to each other, concerned. Through the glass of this holding cell, we can see the other large figure in its holding cell, still with its hand pressed against the glass.

Maximal 2: It�s gone.

Statek: � Slag.

Panel 5.

(Present) Statek stands at the glass. He looks up. From the shadows looms the large figure, towering over Statek.

Dialogue PNL X: And my Spark calls back.

----- End -----

A little difficult to read with the two scenes being told at once, but hopefully with a couple of readings you'll get what's going on.