Transformers Filks

[GoktimusPrime]

Post 'em here! I'll start with some festive ones! :)

--------------------------------

Sung to the tune of "Joy To The World"

Doom to our world, we've no more fuel!
Cybertron has run dry;
The Autobots prepare for launch,
And fly aboard the Ark,
And fly aboard the Ark,
In search of, in search of, more Energon.

Look out ahead, there's asteroids!
Fire the main cannon;
We'll clear a path, and fly right through,
I think we're being chased,
I think we're being chased,
I think that, I think that, we're being chased.

The Nemesis, has caught us now,
They're gonna board our ship;
Decepticons have come on-board
And now a fight ensues,
And now a fight ensues,
And now a, and now a, fight ensues.

We're crashing down, to that blue world,
Into a volcano;
Four million years have passed us now,
We slept through the Beast Wars
We slept through the Beast Wars
We slept through, we slept through, the Beast Wars.

--------------------------------

Sung to the tune of "Stille Nacht" (Silent Night)

Violent night, blazing lights
Enemies, in my sights
Defending Autobot City
They got through in one of our ships
Transform to attack mode
Transform to attack mode

Violent night, blazing lights
Fighting for what is right
Missiles stream from heaven afar
We can only transform into cars
Blaster, please call for aid
Blaster, please call for aid

Violent night, blazing lights
What is that, taking flight?
From Cybertron the shuttle has come
They have come to bring us freedom
Prime, the saviour has won
Prime, the saviour has won

--------------------------------

Sung to the tune of "Angels We Have Heard On High"

Welcome to the world of waste
We're the capital of junk
We do sometimes judge in haste
But we sing and dance with funk

Bah-weep-nah, granah-weep-nini-bong!
Bah-weep-nah, granah-weep-nini-bong!

Come to Junkion and see
Join us in our dance and sing;
Come, learn to talk like T.V.,
Wheelie spins, Grimlock is king.

Bah-weep-nah, granah-weep-nini-bong!
Bah-weep-nah, granah-weep-nini-bong!

Ultra Magnus blown apart
By Sweeps as you can see;
Junkions please lend your aid,
With money back guarantee.

Bah-weep-nah, granah-weep-nini-bong!
Bah-weep-nah, granah-weep-nini-bong!

Now we fly into the stars
To destroy that Unicron;
We call him the Grand Poobah,
Hope he doesn't mind our pong.

Bah-weep-nah, granah-weep-nini-bong!
Bah-weep-nah, granah-weep-nini-bong!

[roller]

well someones got alot of time on their hands

this christmas:D

[GoktimusPrime]

The very first TF filk I did was called "Cybertronian Rhapsody" back in 1997 (the year of Machine Wars!).

It's sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen. :)

----------------------

Is this Transformers -
Is this just fantasy -
(Maximals):
Gone through a wormhole -
No escape from brutality -
(Optimus Prime):
Open your eyes
We're going down you'll see
(Teletran One):
I'm a computer, submitting to gravity -
Because I'm easy come, easy go
Flying fast, landing low,
Crashing in a mountain, doesn't really matter to me, - to me,

(Starscream):
Megatron, just killed a 'bot,
Fusion cannon against his head,
Pulled the trigger, now he's dead,
Mega', now we're on our way
We'll go and destroy Autobot City -
Mega', ooo,
Didn't mean to throw you out -
(Galvatron):
I'll come back and kill you this time tomorrow -
Traitor scum! Traitor scum! I'll blast you into ashes-

(Optimus Prime):
Too late, my time has come,
Not feeling very Prime -
Body's aching all the time,
Goodbye everybody - I've got to go -
Gotta leave you 'til the day when all are one -
Magnus, ooo,
You're the new leader,
(Ultra Magnus):
I sometimes wish I'd never been chosen at all -

(Megatron):
I see a little silhouetto of a world,
Energon, energon - collect the energon-cubes -
(Cheetor):
Electro-bolts and lightning, very very frightening me-
(Cybertrons): (Destrons):
Sentoh Robo, Sentoh Robo,
Sentoh Robo, Sentoh Robo,
Sentoh Robo modore - Enerugon -
(Daniel):
But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me -
And Wheelie's a wild boy from a dead family -
Spare us our lives from this audacity -
(Autobots):
Easy come, easy go -, will you let them go
(Prosecutor):
Quintesson! No -, we will not let them go
(Hot Rod: let them go)
Quintesson! We will not let them go - let them go
Quintesson! We will not let them go - let them go
Will not let them go - (Daniel/Wheelie):let us go
Will not let you go - let us go
(Galvatron):
No, no, no, no, no, no, no -
(Ultra Magnus):
By the matrix, by the matrix, by the matrix OPEN UP!!!
(Sharkticon):
The Quintessons are gonna bring a meal for me, for me, for me -

<Dinobots start headbanging>

(Optimus Primal):
So you think you can plunder and conquer us all -
(Megatron):
If you think you can stop us you sure have some gall -
(Optimus Primal):
Go-rilla, I change into gorilla -
(Rattrap):
Just gotta get out - just gotta get right outta here -

(Dead End):
Nothing really matters,
Any fool can see,
Nothing really matters -, nothing ever matters to me,
(Unicron):
Anywhere Primus goes...

[Sky Shadow]

The very first TF filk I did was called "Cybertronian Rhapsody" back in 1997 (the year of Machine Wars!).

It's sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen. :)

That's really good. I don't have a Christmas one, but this is one I wrote for which Starscream decided that the original Transformers: the Movie would be better as an operetta. So he sings his coronation scene (to the tune of 'Hey Jude' by The Beatles.)

Hey You!

Hey you! Don't interrupt
My coronation with flagellation.
You say that all "this is bad comedy"
But I'd like to see you do it better.

Hey you! Don't be unclear.
I asked a question, so answer better
When I say, hey "Megatron is that you?"
'Cause "here's a hint" could mean whatever.

But is it "no" or is it "yes"? Who knows? I guess
You mean that you were but now you're bolder.
But Megatron, oh if that's you... Oh crap, I'm screwed.
I hope that's not fusion near your shoulder.

Hey you! Don't take it bad.
I nearly killed you but you got better. (Rumble: But is it "no" or is it "yes"?)
We're singing? Hey what the heck's that about?
Since when was this an operetta?

But is it "no" or is it "yes"? Who knows, I guess
You never "(how shall we say) departed".
And yes, I know it's not just you. Skywarp, that's you?
In this diction'ry, look up "armada".

Hey you! Don't interrupt
My coronation with flagellation.
You say that all "this is bad comedy"
But I'd like to see you do it better, better, better, better, better, better. Aaargh! (Starscream is blasted by Galvatron.)

Constructicons: Parp parp parp parpa parp parp.
Parpa parp parp.
Starscream's ghost: Hey you!
(Repeat a ridiculous amount of times until someone finally blasts the Constructicons' trumpets.)

[GoktimusPrime]

Noice! :D

[roller]

heres something i came up with in the Carribean


To the tune of "My life as a 50 yr old virgin" by S.Witwicky, 2007 Scotty brothers records


"Isn't it jolly nice to have a Grimlock? Isnt it jolly nice to have an Op?

your G1 slugfest, your Ironfist your Beastwars K9

Your Ravage in its box

So 3 cheers for your Cliffjumper or custom Sparkplug
3 cheers for your 1 eye Unicron
Your Peter Cullen your Scott Mcneil

Mint in box, mint on card

we dont need no food, buy the stupid toy

buy buy buy

buy buy buy

buy motherluncheow buy buy buy!
Touch the moon touch the moon, Primus you fool, Optimus aint no prime,Rodimus you are the chosen one in time!!!

filks suck

yeahhhh yeah yeah

expressing yourself should be made EEEEEEEEEEEEEEeee legallllll!!!!"

(super guitar solo)

dooo dooo ddoooo tishhhhhhhhhhhh (symbols clashing)

[GoktimusPrime]

...I don't know this song. Can you provide a link?

[roller]

...I don't know this song. Can you provide a link?

no

i cant find one on the internet (shock horror:eek:)

Try asking a record shop if they have one of those cds u can listen to, like a demo, listen b4 u buy etc

[Geminii]

Hmm... quick filk check. 11 Transformers filks in my scratch file, although some of them are a bit crap.

[Geminii]

i cant find one on the internet

Not even at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGRPFUYUUdQ ?

[Sky Shadow]

...I don't know this song. Can you provide a link?

http://www.mwscomp.com/movies/mol/m-lyrics.htm

The song is from Monty Python's Meaning Of Life. Language and juvenile/adult themes. It's the second song from the bottom. No pun intended.

[Paulbot]

It's not mine, but I still sing "Pretty Fly (Cause I Like Pie) (http://groups.google.com.au/group/alt.toys.transformers/browse_thread/thread/c7f1bf59d0010636?hl=en&ie=UTF-8)" when I hear "Pretty Fly (For A White Guy)".

[roller]

good work on picking up the first bit of my 'song' Skyshadow, top points!!!

[Geminii]

I've been to cities that never closed down
From Crystal to Darkmount and Iacon town
But no matter what planet or system I roam
I'll always call Cybertron home.

I've crewed on spaceships and shuttles galore
As soon as I touch down I'm launching once more
But my fuel pump still yearns for those spi-res and domes;
I'll always call Cybertron home.

All the senseless slaughter
Echoed down the ages
A futile and factional fray.
And 'though our world is older, and colder,
Still I hope I'll return there some day

(When) We are two peoples united as one,
And all of our starships come back from far suns;
Then I'll realise something that I've always known -
I'll always call Cybertron,
(always call Cybertron,)
Always call Cybertron home!

[Geminii]

The slow speed of light urged the first hyperdrive,
Then Spanner invented a new way to travel.
Built into his bridge by the 'Cons while alive
So the delicate void wouldn't start to unravel.
But the stresses of stars gave him gravity-scars,
And then black-hole-linked Megatron blew him to char
Fear of death led a Star-Mangled-Spanner to waive
Freedom's choice; even now, as a corpse he's enslaved.

[Geminii]

Scratching down a filk to lyrics someone's requested
Or maybe suggested,
I hope that I won't break it
Muppetational in scope
My goal: to remake it
Or failing that, fake it (Ya!)
I'll find a goal and there I'll take it


How about a line
That speaks of TV shows?
Is G1 the best or is it overexposed?

What about a verse
(Wait a mo, wait a mo)
That says the comics are best?
Pick a continuity and throw out the rest.


Movie threads can sometimes get a bit controversial
A two-hour commercial
For Hasbro corporation
Killed off half the G1 cast, ol' Starscream was toasted
(He came back re-ghosted)
Was Season Three an abberation?


Moving' right along - hey, G2, where did you go?
Wait 'till ninety six to see a new TV show.

Then we have the Beasts
(not a truck, not a truck!)
The fuzzballs stole the show
Love it, hate it, Beast Machines would change what we know.


Ladder truck for Prime, and fighting Predacon forces
With lengthy discourses
But static animation
Now Armada, Energon and Dreamwave revivals
Ensure the survival
Of our obsessive fascination


Alternator tech
And toys and fans and Cons
I think we've hit the big time
More than twenty years on.

[Geminii]

You're cruel, but I
Can't run, won't hide
Your looks, could kill
My pain, your thrill

I want to love you but we're fighting instead
I want to hold you but I'm Maximal, you're a Pred
I want to kiss you but you fill me with dread
My friends say waste you 'cause your lips are Predacon poison

You're poison running through my brain
Poison
Struggle 'gainst these thoughts in vain

I'm yours
We fought
Your web
I'm caught
Can't break
Your net
You'll be
Mine yet

I hear you calling and I cannot resist
I'd crawl through lava just for one more chance of a kiss
I know we're enemies but I shoot to miss
I'll be a target for those lips of Predacon poison

You're poison running through my brain
Poison
Take up arms now, once again
Poison

One shot, could kill
My pain, your thrill

I want to love you and my heart rules my head
I want to hold you but you've bound me tight in your thread
I want to kiss you, all my reason has fled
I think I'm fated to go down to Predacon poison

You're poison running through my brain
Poison
Attraction I can not explain
Poison

I want to love you but my friends have all said
Desire to hold you only means I'll quickly be dead
I like to think that I can see what's ahead
I know my destiny - succumbed to Predacon poison

Our fate it binds me, I'm enchained
I'm poisoned, oh no
Spider's weapon, hero's bane
Share my life, my joy, my pain
Poison
Spurn me, burn me, I remain
Poisoned

[Geminii]

- Our world is shattered and our people torn by war
(Our) conflict ever grows and yet we can't deny our core
(We) drink from power's source and light the fire in our eyes
(With) crystal hearts and hands of steel - we're robots in disguise

Transformers
More than meets the eye
Transformers
Robots in disguise

(Is) This the will of Primus or some evil Quintesson?
(Will) We forever battle in a war we all prolong?
Immortal strife our destiny, we tarnish and destroy
(Is) Free will an illusion, are we nothing more than toys?

Transformers
Destiny devised
Transformers
Cybertron arise

Millennia have come and gone and seen our endless fight
(These) Autobots, Decepticons, consigned unto the night
(And) Silent voices wonder if the day will ever come
(To) Lay our weapons down at last and say that all are one

[Geminii]

Hey fans - Why didn't you warn me?
Why didn't you say I'd become like you?
Did you just let me go out, onto the net -
Now fan-spawned sites have captured me too.

So I put filks on the net, wrote a fanfic quatrain
Tried a site of my own, learned of "writer's block" pain;
I've spent all my nights locked in role-playing games
And it felt so good, I wanna do it again.

Hey now - you're sitting there grinning;
'Cause I found toys were something I had to own.
Bought an Opt'mus Prime, and Seeker jets.
I know addiction now, but I just can't leave it alone!

So I spent cash on the toys, now my wallet's in pain
The BotCon I loved, I did more of the same!
Found adminning bites, on those role-playing games
But it felt so good, I'd do it over again.

And I watched shows for the Truck, slowed it down frame by frame
And the monkey stuff, guess I'd catch it again.
I wanna see it again, just cos it borrowed the name, hey hey!
Ohh, think it's so good... hey?

Hey group - since I'm posting -
What was it like, when 'here' was young?
Guess the names change, and it's not the same,
But all in all, we're still encored as number one!

So I watched all of the shows, learned the voice actors' names
A link to my site got me minutes of fame
My sketching improves, Khanna's style is my aim
If I'm not so good, I can redo it again

And I scanned sites on the net, till the art filled my brain
Read TrypticonX, wondered who was insane
I learned how to filter the best from the lame
But I read it all, and I'd do it again.

And I lurked on a.t.t, 'til I had to declaim -
And it felt so good, I'll maybe do it again.

[Geminii]

Are you ready for action
Are you ready for war
Choose a face and a faction
Choose a powerful core

Are you willing to face it
Are you willing to die?
Will you rise and embrace it?
Are you ready to fly?

Instruments of destruction
Pawns to die today
Violence and corruption
Flexing powerplays

Does it really matter
If you smash or bounce
As you drown in the chatter
Take a ton for an ounce

And when the night's a nation
You've defied the storm
Define your own creation
Take it and transform

Instruments of destruction
Tools to find a way
Pylons of construction
Exist in disarray

What's in an existence?
Why continue to fight?
Why the spark of resistance?
Why the howl in the night?

And when destruction's over
You've survived the storm
Leave the world behind now
You are now transformed

[Geminii]

Down amongst the toy aisles where the plastic boxes nap
You'll find old dolls and bears and bikes and this year's tie-in crap
Designs of old are re-imagined, new ideas abound
But there is one that captures me the moment that it's found

Well, some kids go for action figures, dolls and human types
While others buy whatever this year's TV schedule hypes
And some like cars or trains or cranes or robot dinosaurs
But me, I want the toy that's all of this in one, and more!

The toys I like are characters from movies and TV;
They're aliens, they're robots, and they've soldiers' weaponry
They have a million gimmicks, they've got movement, lights and voice
And when you're done, they then become all other kinds of toys!

Just fold their arms and bend their legs; then twist them at the waist
Their limbs fold back, their heads retract, their details unencase
And where there was a action figure, now there sits a plane,
Or truck or car or dinosaur or spaceship, base or crane!

There's clever engineering in those robots from the sky
A huge assortment; always there's another 'bot to buy
They'll turn into your favorite shape, they'll change before your eyes
They're all-in-one, they're massive fun, they're robots in disguise!

So not for me your board games or your fuzzy teddy bear;
No bike, no ball, no costume mask, no games of cards to share
The all-in-one philosophy's a quantum playtime leap / down the
Toy aisle, where the
Plastic boxes sleep

[Geminii]

Come on friend, why don't we take a flight
And all that Jazz
Launch the Ark into the starry night
And all that Jazz

He's a Porshe-type car
With a softer spot
For the human race
What an Autobot
He'll give his all
When he hears the call
That's all
That's
Jazz

From the dark of space to the plains of Earth
It's always Jazz
In the grounded ship with a mountain berth
It's home to Jazz

He's a saboteur who's into rock'n'roll
With a voice like velvet over gold
If it's Special Ops this robot tops the poll
You know
It's
Jazz

(Instrumental)
It's always Jazz
(Instrumental)
It's always Jazz

It's a plastic toy for every girl and boy
And its name is Jazz
He appears again in a comic book
Yes, in it's Jazz
It's a G1, G2, take a look
Yes, it's still Jazz

Oh, see him there on the cartoon screen
He's a loyal 'Bot and a pun machine
In the film he was eaten but he couldn't be beaten
We love
Live
Jazz

Oh he was there in Iacon, Season One
It's always Jazz
Up to Season Three, he was never done
Always Jazz

Show him where to park his fender
He's a human cultural defender
There's no doubt, so hear us shout it out
We're all
For
Jazz

Come on friend, you need a music break
- So sayeth Jazz
He's gonna play a Cybertronic mix of sound
- It's DJ Jazz
Forget the war, just get down and shake
To all that jazz
He's gonna pump it up and bring the ceiling down
With all that Jazz

Oh he can shimmy till your optics break
Forever Jazz

He's a Porshe-type car
With a softer spot
For the human race
What an Autobot
He'll give his all
When he hears the call
That's all
That's
Jazz

Show him where to park his fender
(G)1, G2, Alternator, Pretender
There's no doubt, so hear us shout it out
We're all
For
Jazz

(Instrumental)
...Jazz!

Yes, we're ever proud
To proclaim out loud
That we -
Like -
Jazz!....

That Jazz!

[Geminii]

Instafilks on request, etc etc.

[GoktimusPrime]

Could you please specify which tunes your filks are meant to be sung to? I gather your first one is sung to "I Still Call Australia Home" by Peter Allen, but the others I don't get. Thanks. :)

[Sky Shadow]

Down amongst the toy aisles where the plastic boxes nap...

Great use and appreciation of metre, Banjo. :-)

[Sky Shadow]

Scratching down a filk to lyrics someone's requested...

Hey Geminii - are you SteveD from ATT?

[Geminii]

Well matched, yes.

The tunes are:
"I Still Call Australia Home"
variations on "To Anacreon in Heaven" (The Star-Spangled Banner)
"Movin' Right Along" (Muppet Movie)
"Poison" (Alice Cooper)
More Than Meets The Eye (Transformers: The Movie theme song)
"Buses and Trains" (Bachelor Girl)
"Instruments of Destruction" (N.R.G.)
No particular song, 4/4 beat
"All That Jazz" (Chicago, the Musical)

[Tommy K]

more than a feeling by soundwave(G1)

i woke up this morning and starscream was gone
i listen to my music to start the day
i lost ravage in a familar song
i closed my eyes and i flew away

its more than a killing *more than a killing
when i hear that old gun blast away
i begin destroying *more than a killing
till i see megatron kill michael bay
i see megatron killing michael bay

So many bots have come and gunned
Their lazers fade as the autobots die
Yet I still reload and kill on
As clear as my gun firing from the sky

its more than a killing *more than a killing
when i hear that old gun blast away
i begin destroying *more than a killing
till i see megatron kill michael bay
i see megatron killing michael bay

When Im out of ammo and cant reload
I call for the sweeps, and send out rumble
And watch as he sends tremors while im in the sky
I closed my eyes and fly away
i fly awa y. i fly away.

ts more than a killing *more than a killing
when i hear that old gun blast away
i begin destroying *more than a killing
till i see megatron kill michael bay
i see megatron killing michael bay



soo what do you guys think? too goriful? i could make up another if that ones too bad

heres another
wake me up before you go go waspinators version

waspinator [4X]

You put the boom-boom into my armor
You send my head flying high when your shooting starts
all this pain into my brain
Goes a zap-zap-zap 'til i go insane
But something's zapping you
Something ain't right
Megatron told me what you did last night
Left me hanging from a thread
I was dieng, but I should have killed with you instead.

blow him up before you go-go
Don't make him destroy me again oh no no
blow him up before you go-go
I don't want to miss you blowing him sky high
blow him up before you go-go
'Cause I'm not plannin' on fighting solo
blow him up before you go-go
Then take me blasting tonight
I wanna hit them high (yeah, yeah)

once the grey skies are out of my way
You can then take on Doris Day
Explosions brighter them flame
My blasts per minute never been the same

'Cause you're my leader, I'm really a fool
It makes me crazy when you act so cruel
Come on, master, let's go fight
i wont get blown up and everything will be all right

blow him up before you go-go
Don't make him destroy me again oh no no
blow him up before you go-go
I don't want to miss you blowing him sky high
blow him up before you go-go
'Cause I'm not plannin' on fighting solo
blow him up before you go-go
Then take me blasting tonight
I wanna hit them high (yeah, yeah)

(waspinator)
(waspinator)

come on inferno lets not fight
i hate getting blown up at night
It's cold out there, but it's warm in the base
They can fight, we'll stay away instead

(waspinator)

blow him up before you go-go
Don't make him destroy me again oh no no
blow him up before you go-go
I don't want to miss you blowing him sky high
blow him up before you go-go
'Cause I'm not plannin' on fighting solo
blow him up before you go-go
Then take me blasting tonight
blow him up before you go-go, Don't make him destroy me again oh no no
Take me blasting

(Boom-boom-boom)

[GoktimusPrime]

To the tune of O Canada (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zwDvF0NtgdU)*

O the Beast Wars!
Raging on ancient Earth!
On Axalon by Maximal command.
With glowing Sparks we see thee rise,
From G1 and G2!
Through time and space, O the Beast Wars,
Animated by CG
Our show did have, subtle dirty jokes
O the Beast Wars, our figures can pose free.
O the Beast Wars, we will remember thee.

French** translation
O les Beasties!
Faire rage sur la terre antique!
Sur Axalon par la commande Maximale.
Avec les étincelles rougeoyantes nous vous voyons se lever,
De G1 et de G2!
Par le temps et le cosmos,
O les Beasties, a animé par CG.
Notre exposition a eu, des plaisanteries sales subtiles
O les Beasties, nos jouets peut poser librement.
O les Beasties, nous se rappellera vous.

--------------------
*cos the Beast Wars cartoon was made in Canada (http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Mainframe_Entertainment). ;)
**That's Canadian French too! Most of us remember that Beast Wars was called "Ani-Mutant" in most Francophone countries, but in Canada it was called "Beasties" (as YTV was uncomfortable with the use of the word "Wars" in the title of a children's cartoon :p)

[GoktimusPrime]

To the tune of Salva Nos (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXvVWhQRRyY) (from the animé series "Noir")

Dominus Primus Lord Primus
exaudi nos et miserere Hear us and have mercy
exaudi, Dominus Hear us, lord

Dona nobis pacem Grant us peace
et salva nos a Unicron And save us from Unicron
Salva nos, Primus Save us, Primus

Dominus exaudi nos Lord hear us
Dominus miserere Lord have mercy
dona nobis pacem Grant us peace
Sanctus, Gloria Holy, glory

Dona nobis pacem Grant us peace
e dona eis requiem And give them rest
inter oves locum Amongst this rejoiced place
voca me cum benedictis Call me with the blessed
Pie Vector Sigma, dona eis requiem Merciful Vector Sigma, give them rest
Dominus Primus, Sanctus, Gloria Lord Primus, holy, glory

[GoktimusPrime]

Sung to the tune of "Pretty Fly (For A White Guy) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PckuItiI-HM)"

Warning: Contains coarse language & adult themes (offensive words are "spoiler tagged")





Japanischen verschluckt Hasbro

Give it to me fanboys, uh huh, uh huh
Give it to me fanboys, uh huh, uh huh
Give it to me fanboys, uh huh, uh huh
And Shane McCarthy say I'm pretty hot for a white bot

Bah weep granah weep nini nini nini bong

You know its kinda hard to sell robot comics
Thinks G1 finished up in 1986
Profits going down, sales sure needed a lift
From All Hail Megatron, they came and gave us Drift

So why don't you, love Gary Stus
Has a black belt in every martial art
Former Decepticon, now that's gone
He drives real fast, he drives real fast

With swords so great, he over compensates
It's like a bad fan-fic where fanboys masturbates
Just grab your comic book and
Hey, hey, do that fanboy thing!

Give it to me fanboys, uh huh, uh huh
Give it to me fanboys, uh huh, uh huh
Give it to me fanboys, uh huh, uh huh
And IDW says I'm pretty hot for a white bot

He needed a new toy, not just any will suffice
Especially when we're paying thirty-dollars retail price
His legs are really chunky, they don't lock below the knees
His doors have Rising Suns, with some random Japanese!

With such mighty fists, take the piss
Out of a big transforming Chuck Nor-ris
Drift's got sex appeal, spin that wheel
He drives which way, he drives which way?
It's a toy so great, go tell all your mates
Then go log online and have lots of debates
Grab your action figure and
Hey, hey, play with your new toy!

Now he's getting tampographs yeah, some Kanji for his doors
He asks for a "Dorifto", but they wrote down "Samurai"
Fans say he's trying too hard and he's not quite hip
But in his author's mind he's the, he's the dopest trick

Give it to fanboys, uh huh, uh huh
Give it to fanboys, uh huh, uh huh
Give it to fanboys, uh huh, uh huh

Bah weep granah weep nini nini nini bong

Such amazing feats, he can't be beat
Nameless minions might as well admit defeat
Who is this boy?
Go get the toy!
You will all pay, you will all pay
With swords so great, he over compensates
It's like a bad fan-fic where fanboys masturbates
We all just love G1
Is this guy even from G1?
Let's all pretend he's from G1
Hey, hey, do MacGuffin things!

[Hursticon]

lol, I'm assuming that this is aimed at Drift? :p

[Geminii]

He needed a new toy, not just any will suffice
Especially when we're paying thirty-dollars retail price
His legs are really chunky, they don't lock below the knees
His doors have Rising Suns, with some random Japanese!

Best. Verse. Ever.

Anyone else think this song needs a YouTube video to go with it?

[GoktimusPrime]

This Filk is gonna take 12 days to complete (so please bear with me) :) Sung to the tune of "The Twelve Days of Christmas"...

The Twelve Days of Festivus

On the first day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
A Rav bird on a Spud-bot!

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days01.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

On the second day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days02.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

On the third day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days03.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

On the fourth day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days04.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

On the fifth day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Five Golden 'Bees!
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days05.jpg

Note: Although this was technically posted on 18/12, I did take this photo on the 17/12! I'm just a few minutes over! (hey, it's still 17/12 in NT, SA and WA atm, right? :p)

[GoktimusPrime]

On the sixth day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Six cassettes playing
Five Golden 'Bees!
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days06.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

Oops, forgot to post last night even though I had the photo ready! Doing a double one for yesterday and today in this post. :)

--------------------------------------------

On the seventh day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Seven robots swimming
Six cassettes playing
Five Golden 'Bees!
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days07.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

*tsk* I said double before and only posted one pic... <facepalms.self>

-------------------------------------------------------

On the eighth day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Eight maids-a posing
Seven robots swimming
Six cassettes playing
Five Golden 'Bees!
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days08.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

On the ninth day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Nine PlaySkools dancing
Eight maids-a posing
Seven robots swimming
Six cassettes playing
Five Golden 'Bees!
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days09.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

On the tenth day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Ten Legends parking
Nine PlaySkools dancing
Eight maids-a posing
Seven robots swimming
Six cassettes playing
Five Golden 'Bees!
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days10.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

On the eleventh day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Eleven Go-Bots going
Ten Legends parking
Nine PlaySkools dancing
Eight maids-a posing
Seven robots swimming
Six cassettes playing
Five Golden 'Bees!
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days11.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

On the twelfth day of Festivus Lord Primus gave to me...
Twelve Action Masters
Eleven Go-Bots going
Ten Legends parking
Nine PlaySkools dancing
Eight maids-a posing
Seven robots swimming
Six cassettes playing
Five Golden 'Bees!
Four cyber-birds
Three bad Seekers
Two Turtle 'Cons
And a Rav bird on a Spud-bot
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y227/goktimusprime/Transformers/12%20Days%20of%20Festivus/12days12.jpg

[GoktimusPrime]

Sung to the tune of "Wouldn't It Be Nice?" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-E4FRtrD9aQ) by the Beach Boys.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wouldn't it be nice if fans ran Hasbro
Then we wouldn't have to wait so long
To get Generation One done into
Classics toys that we all really want

You know that its gonna really make us happy
When we can just stop repain-tiiiiing Bumblebees

Wouldn't it be nice if we could make up
A movie-verse with a good story line
And after having spent the day with writers
Pump out a film that can really shine

Happy times together we've been spending
Wishing Marvel G1 was neeever ending
Wouldn't it be nice

We could reissue as many G1 toys as we could do
Maybe then we could have exclusive eHobby repaints too
We could do Fort Maaax (We could do Fort Maaax)
Then we could do Grand Maaax (Then we could do Grand Maaax)

Wouldn't it be nice

You know it seems the more we talk about it
It only makes it worse to liiive without it
But let's talk about it
Wouldn't it be nice

[GoktimusPrime]

OPTIMUS PRIME STYLE (sung to the tune of Gangnam Style)

Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style

Every day we play with toys made by Hasbro
We go hunt at Toys R Us and deparment stores that we all know
But finding no new toys doesn't make us feel placated
It just makes us feel frustrated
No more Bumblebees!
That character's done to death and keeps on shelfwarming
Why don't they give us new characters that we haven't seen?
Nobody wants to have five hundred versions of Bumblebee
No more shelfwarming

Over in Japan, they have some new guys
Like Leadfoot - Hey! - and Deluxe Soundwave - Hey!
They have Quejack, but where is Mirage?
What a gip! - Hey! - Not good enough - Hey!
Arms Microns with those stickers drives us nuts

Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op Eyeyeyeyeyey

Changing from vehicles to robots is really just so cool
As well as weapons and cassettes, animals and some ghouls
If they scan it, they can use it as their current transformation
"Let's Transform!" is their exclamation

Robots in disguise
Autobots and Decepticons fighting over land and sky
Maximals, Predacons and Mini-Cons, some of them can fly
Combining teams of robots merging to form what we call gestalts
More than meets the eye
War for Cybertron, Fall of Cybertron
These are games - Hey! - We play online - Hey!
For the convention, there is BotCon
Far ahoy - Hey! - Exclusive toys - Hey!
Get your eHobby toys right now don't be coy

Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op Eyeyeyeyeyey

Comic books, and cartoons on TV
Baby baby, buy all the merchandising
Transformers Prime, and IDW
Baby baby, we read and watch everything
You know what I'm saying?!

Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op Eyeyeyeyeyey
Optimus Prime Style

[KalEl]

OPTIMUS PRIME STYLE (sung to the tune of Gangnam Style)

Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style

Every day we play with toys made by Hasbro
We go hunt at Toys R Us and deparment stores that we all know
But finding no new toys doesn't make us feel placated
It just makes us feel frustrated
No more Bumblebees!
That character's done to death and keeps on shelfwarming
Why don't they give us new characters that we haven't seen?
Nobody wants to have five hundred versions of Bumblebee
No more shelfwarming

Over in Japan, they have some new guys
Like Leadfoot - Hey! - and Deluxe Soundwave - Hey!
They have Quejack, but where is Mirage?
What a gip! - Hey! - Not good enough - Hey!
Arms Microns with those stickers drives us nuts

Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op Eyeyeyeyeyey

Changing from vehicles to robots is really just so cool
As well as weapons and cassettes, animals and some ghouls
If they scan it, they can use it as their current transformation
"Let's Transform!" is their exclamation

Robots in disguise
Autobots and Decepticons fighting over land and sky
Maximals, Predacons and Mini-Cons, some of them can fly
Combining teams of robots merging to form what we call gestalts
More than meets the eye
War for Cybertron, Fall of Cybertron
These are games - Hey! - We play online - Hey!
For the convention, there is BotCon
Far ahoy - Hey! - Exclusive toys - Hey!
Get your eHobby toys right now don't be coy

Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Truck Prime Style
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op Eyeyeyeyeyey

Comic books, and cartoons on TV
Baby baby, buy all the merchandising
Transformers Prime, and IDW
Baby baby, we read and watch everything
You know what I'm saying?!

Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op, Optimus Prime Style
Eeeeh, TakaraTOMY
Op Op Op Op Eyeyeyeyeyey
Optimus Prime Style
record this!

[GoktimusPrime]

Transformers That I Used To Know (sung to the tune of Somebody That I Used To Know (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UVNT4wvIGY))

[Collector]
Now and then I think of how I like Transformers
Like all the robots that are more than meets the eye
Told myself Hasbro could do no wrong
A completely awesome toy company
But the Eighties was a decade I can still remember

You can get addicted to a certain kind of plastic
Like Furman said it never ends, it never ends
So when Beast Wars came and we all were glad
Transformers became a brand new fad
But we still longed for vehicular Transformers

But you didn't have to mess things up
Let animators design robots as if the toys were nothing
Remember that the toys came first
Goin' back to this method is what we really thirst
No the movies didn't have to blow
Have Bumblebee become the hero and then badly shelf-warm
The franchise didn't need that though
This isn't Transformers that I used to know

This isn't Transformers that I used to know
This isn't Transformers that I used to know

[Hasbro]
Now and then I think of all the demands that Wal*Mart gives us
They have us believing it was always something we should do
But they don't want us to show restraint
So we give them even more repaints
And now they sit and sell real slow
And I wouldn't see you hung up on Transformers that you used to know

[Collector]
But you didn't have to cut us off
Make out like we stopped collecting and that we were nothing
Remember that it's toys we hunt
Prioritising the toyline is what we really want
Animated didn't have to go
Season 3 got interesting and then it got cancelled
Prime is now the brand new show
But it ain't the Transformers that I used to know

Transformers
(I used to know)
Transformers
Transformers
(I used to know)
Transformers

(This isn't the Transformers that I used to know)

(I used to know)
(That I used to know)
(I used to know)
Transformers

[KalEl]

Transformers That I Used To Know (sung to the tune of Somebody That I Used To Know (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UVNT4wvIGY))

[Collector]
Now and then I think of how I like Transformers
Like all the robots that are more than meets the eye
Told myself Hasbro could do no wrong
A completely awesome toy company
But the Eighties was a decade I can still remember

You can get addicted to a certain kind of plastic
Like Furman said it never ends, it never ends
So when Beast Wars came and we all were glad
Transformers became a brand new fad
But we still longed for vehicular Transformers

But you didn't have to mess things up
Let animators design robots as if the toys were nothing
Remember that the toys came first
Goin' back to this method is what we really thirst
No the movies didn't have to blow
Have Bumblebee become the hero and then badly shelf-warm
The franchise didn't need that though
This isn't Transformers that I used to know

This isn't Transformers that I used to know
This isn't Transformers that I used to know

[Hasbro]
Now and then I think of all the demands that Wal*Mart gives us
They have us believing it was always something we should do
But they don't want us to show restraint
So we give them even more repaints
And now they sit and sell real slow
And I wouldn't see you hung up on Transformers that you used to know

[Collector]
But you didn't have to cut us off
Make out like we stopped collecting and that we were nothing
Remember that it's toys we hunt
Prioritising the toyline is what we really want
Animated didn't have to go
Season 3 got interesting and then it got cancelled
Prime is now the brand new show
But it ain't the Transformers that I used to know

Transformers
(I used to know)
Transformers
Transformers
(I used to know)
Transformers

(This isn't the Transformers that I used to know)

(I used to know)
(That I used to know)
(I used to know)
Transformers

I'm really tempted to create this....

[GoktimusPrime]

By all means please do (so as you credit me for the lyrics) :)

[GoktimusPrime]

Sung to the tune of You're Simply The Best" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GC5E8ie2pdM)
---------------------------------------------------------
You've collected Transformers for these thirty years
Decepticons, Autobots, have no fear
You never stopped, buying all the toys you need
Gathered a lifetime of Transformers and a world of dreams
You've got videos and Blu Rays and DVDs
And the comic books, you know the lore with just one look, baby

You're simply obsessed, more obsessed than all the rest,
More obsessed than anyone, anyone I've ever met
You never gave up, you stuck by the best and worst
Without your support, the franchise would already be dead

Wear Transformers apparel of every night and every day
With passion, you get lost, even carried away
Just as long as there are toys to buy you could be in no better place

You're simply obsessed, more obsessed than all the rest,
More obsessed than anyone, anyone I've ever met
You know all their names, their personalities and their strife

Oh three decades on now, baby Transformers is your life
Each new wave that comes out, you start losing control,
Transformers has got your heart and soul
With the Transformers you're just never alone
Oh baby don't let go!

And you're simply obsessed, more obsessed than all the rest,
More obsessed than anyone, anyone I've ever met
You know what would work, it's not like those other passing trends
Through thick and thin, oh for you it just never ends, ooh you're obsessed!

[GoktimusPrime]

Sung to the tune of Let It Go (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moSFlvxnbgk)
---------------------------------------------------
I went out to buy Transformers last night
Not a new toy to be seen
Shelfwarming one step changers
Overflowing at the seams

It is amazing how retail stores have survived
Couldn't find new toys, Primus knows I tried!

Bring on new toys, please let us see
Toys that make us want to pay your fees
Where are these toys, please let us know
We want to know!

Please Hasbro, please Hasbro
Can't hold it back anymore
Please Hasbro, please Hasbro
Local stores are such a bore!

Stores should care
Who we're going to pay
Or they'll lose those sales
More folks are going online nowadays

It's crappy how Australia
Has skipped on so much stuff
With the passion that once drove us
Collecting's getting tough

It's time to see what we can do
Release the toys and we'll be true
Need to strike while the iron's hot, we plea!

Please Hasbro, please Hasbro
Give us what we want to buy
Please Hasbro, please Hasbro
Frustration makes us cry!

We will spend
And we would pay
Bring the toy sales on!

Why are Gen'rations proving just so hard to find?
The Australian market's being ever quickly left behind
And one thought crystallises like an icy blast
These Generations toys
Seriously kick some @®$3!

Please Hasbro, please Hasbro
Go ahead and release these toys
Please Hasbro, please Hasbro
For happy girls and boys

Cash in hand
But where can we pay
Without going on line?
Finding toys in stores would really make our day

[GoktimusPrime]

Another parody of Disney's "Let It Go" from Frozen. ;)
-------------------------------------------
GO ONLINE
-------------------------------------------
I walked into my local toy store
Not a new toy to be seen
Non-converters clogging shelves
And simplified toys to the brim

My need is howling like a swirling storm inside
Couldn't keep it in, so I went on-line

Generations, Masterpieces,
All the good toys that we just never see
Faster, cheaper, online I go
Cos locals blow!

Transformers, Transformers,
I'd rather buy from actual stores
Transformers, Transformers,
Couldn't stand it anymore!

I can't risk
Missing out on good toys
That don't come out here,
But I'd rather buy locally anyway!

Many toys we've missed out on
Makes our local range seem small
The easy and expensive toys
Don't sell too well at all!

It's time to see what I can try
To go online where I can buy
More choice, no stress, more toys for me - such glee!

Transformers, Transformers
I will get what I want to buy
Transformers, Transformers
You'll never see me cry!

Pre-orders
Make it cheaper still
With toys from Japan!

My order travel along the air, ground and sea
It reaches Customs where it lingers for eternity
And one thought crystallises in my impatient mind
It's already in our land
Just bring it to my hand!

Transformers, Transformers
Credit card or PayPal is okay
Transformers, Transformers
It sure beats using eBay!

If local stores
Won't stock the new lines
I shall go on-line,
But I'd rather buy locally anyway!

[GoktimusPrime]

Sung to the tune of the South Park theme song

I'm going down to Earth's Park
Gonna have myself a time
Giant robots everywhere
Hiding out with transformations

I'm gonna collect some Earth's Park
Gonna leave my cash behind
Hasbro's brand new profit margins
Scalpers charging massive fortunes

Heading on up to Earth's Park
Gonna see what I can buy
I love toys with boxes minty
I love toys at retail prices

Some come on down the Earth's Park
And meet see some Bots of mine