I told my girlfriend I collect Transformers...

[roller]

so i told my girlfriend about the whole TF thing today

she took it better then i expected

She said she knew there was a live movie and that was about it

and she asked me why i loike em
i said it was the whole nostaligia thing from my kiddy days

and she was ok with it, she made a joke later on about action figures

So, im super interested in how you broke, or didnt to your special friends about yer super best hobby, i promise im interested, i wont fall asleep :p;)

[TheDirtyDigger]

so i told my girlfriend about the whole TF thing today

she took it better then i expected

She said she knew there was a live movie and that was about it

and she asked me why i loike em
i said it was the whole nostaligia thing from my kiddy days

and she was ok with it, she made a joke later on about action figures

So, im super interested in how you broke, or didnt to your special friends about yer super best hobby, i promise im interested, i wont fall asleep :p;)

Roller...lad....

NEVER tell them until they're pregnant with your child. I fear for this relationship now.

[loophole]

well sometimes you dont have any choice about telling your missus about your obsession especially when your bedroom used to look like this and then the next morning ;) she asks why do you like Transformers so much?

http://i289.photobucket.com/albums/ll214/Loophole83/P4090350.jpg

http://i289.photobucket.com/albums/ll214/Loophole83/P4090354.jpg

FYI normally there would of been a coulple more TF posters on the wall in the above pic

[roller]

well sometimes you dont have any choice about telling your missus about your obsession especially when your bedroom used to look like this and then the next morning ;) she asks why do you like Transformers so much?



well said! :D nah, in this house i have no posters up or toys out...though if you open the wardrobe you'll see them all there in there plastikkeek glory:D

nice DS9 model Loopus

i think shes cool with it, i'll try not to nerd it up from now on though :D

[Golden Phoenix]

Me and my missus were friends before, so she knew what she was getting into when we started.
She isn't really happy that I spend money on Transformers and Lego, although she will happily play with either

[Paulbot]

This thread split of the Questions by newbies thread.

Collecting TFs is a odd thing to bring up on a date but if it's going to be serious relationship and if they are going to see your bedroom you're not going to be able to keep it a secret for long.

For those on the board dating guys there is the advantage that guys tend to remember being into Transformers themselves as a kid and will tend to think it's cool (well more so than girls, women members of this board excluded of course!).

[iceburn]

stares at JuzMel...does Yong remember Transformers?

[STL]

I've never really had to tell any of them. I've been w/ the misssus for almost 3 years now and that's about the length of time Ive been collecting TFs. She eventually found out after we'd been going for 6-7 months. it kinda crept along slowly. I think there were signs but I never made it much of an issue but since about the 1 and 1/2 mark year of our r/ship, we shop a lot together and me for TFs much more. That's probably been helped along a lot by the fact that I'm buying from retail nowadays whereas before it was purely eBay for vintage stuff.

My ex before that knew about it for the 5 months we were together but probably a month or two in.

Given the way my bedroom has changed (far more TFs in it) in the past 2 years, I suspect hiding it as easy anymore. If I got single again, I'd really need to consider some serious redecorating...

[kup]

Everyone (including me) seems to have the Deeps Space 9 model kit :)

[Lint]

She already knew I was a transformers fan so it wasn't a shock when more figures started to mysteriously appear around the house. Besides which her room is littered with plushies so the TF collecting on my part makes her feel like less of a child relative to my awesome self.

[Geminii]

With me it was fairly simple - the S.O. has more fandoms and collections than I'll ever be able to get into. I can buy my usual average of 4 Transformers a year and maintain a computer room which looks like it could launch the space shuttle, and she gets her books, manga, videogames, DVDs, CDs, fanfic, DnD, magazines, stationery, stuffed animals, a fast internet connection, and occasionally extra sets of shelving.

[Lord_Zed]

Everyone (including me) seems to have the Deeps Space 9 model kit :)

Yes but mine is painted! :D

Oh wait what were we talking about, oh right....

My last girlfriend new I collected.. well all manner of things, I don't think she grasped the extent of it though. ;)

[griffin]

It was finding out about my TFs addiction that got her interested in me in the first place, so there was no fear of having to tell her about the 'hobby'.
Yes, toys are a chick magnet... :cool: :p
But I think my 'magnet' needs recharging... :eek: :D

[Omega Supreme]

My gf knew I collected toys when we started dating, but had no idea how much they cost until I was at Toyworld with her and needed to borrow money to get powerlinx prime. She kinda flipped out, but since then has become quite accepting. They are allowed anywhere except the bedroom and getting the ok from her has let me get a pretty nice collection :)

[swoop]

I've been with my better half for almost 4 years now and she still does'nt know about my toy collection. Its been pretty hard hideing over 800 toys but I've managed well so far. She found out about my comic collection about 2 months in when I took her down to comics r us and spent my usual 200 a month. But I've slowly been getting her use to the idea of my transformer obsession. I now have my statues and busts on display in my room and she likes them, thinks there cool and doesn't mind me spending money on them. My tf dvds are at the front of my shelf and I have a couple of shirts and a jacket that I wear all the time. Once while we were out shopping I brought a windcharger keyring and while we were waiting to pay she looked so embarassed that we were waiting in line to buy a toy. So I think I'll be holding off telling her for a while yet about all my figures.

Griffin you know you can get a pill for that now:p

[Burn]

I can't remember how my ex found out, i'm fairly certain it was because she just saw them all in my bedroom.

I'm fairly certain it was one of the reasons she broke up with me, probably didn't thought I was immature for still collecting toys. But dammit, i'm immature with or without a toy collection! :p


This thread split of the Questions by newbies thread.

So how'd my post from the Looking for Animated Snarl thread end up in here? :confused:

[Fungal Infection]

I actually did some "recon" before I decided whether or not I wanted to let her know about my collecting. When we first started dating, one night we were coming back from the city and we were having a conversation in the car and I asked her about her hobbies and she told me she liked cartoons. Then I asked her if she'd ever watched TFs and she said she seen Beast Wars a few years ago. I never mentioned I collect TFs that night. Then a week or so later, we were shopping and I went into a TRU and she was curious so she followed me in. I was looking at some TFs (Armada at the time) and casually said to her, "Hey, look at these toys, they transform from one mode to another, how cool is that?". She agreed and then asked me if I wanted one since it seemed to her that I had a passing interest. I pretended not to be THAT interested (hey it was Armada!!) and just walked off. Then later on we stopped by a comics shop so I could grab a few TF comics at which point she mentioned that for a guy who drives a really nice sports car (since sold *sniff* :( ), goes clubbing (haven't been in while *sniff* :( ), and goes shopping all the time, I sure had some "unique" hobbies. She thought that I didn't look like the typical comics/toy collector type and that I hid it really well. Fast forward 6 years, we are married, I'm still buying stuff, I still miss my old car, and she still shakes her head at me. So all good. :p

[Sky Shadow]

I've been with my better half for almost 4 years now and she still does'nt know about my toy collection. Its been pretty hard hideing over 800 toys but I've managed well so far.

That's... astoundingly impressive. Since my girlfriend is usually the one sitting next to me at the Parramatta collectible fairs, I suspect she's probably figured out the Transformers thing by now. :p Beast Wars Sky Shadow was actually the first Transformer ever bought for me by a girlfriend, back in the nineties. It was a surprise present (and astutely chosen, since I already had Fuzors Silverbolt, Torca and Injector). When another girlfriend and I broke up (amicably), she asked if she could keep my BW Neo Heinlad (which she still has in her room to this day). I don't think it's necessary to keep secrets from the one you love - particularly something that's clearly as big a part of our lives as Transformers. If she or he can't accept us for who we are then it's just not meant to be.

[Paulbot]

I think a Star Trek model or Comic collection be more off putting to a girl than TF toys. I think there's a more commonly known stereotypes for those sort of collectors, but I think most people aren't even aware there are Transformer collectors.

But as others have said most people collect something, and if you can deal with your girl/boyfriend's interests they should be able to deal with yours.



So how'd my post from the Looking for Animated Snarl thread end up in here? :confused:

I have no clue, but it's back where it belongs now :o

[Kyle]

Swoop you're amazing. :o

[Tiby]

My collecting predates my dating years, and always came first! It was no secret and she just had to live with it or move on. Tried changing for girls once and just felt like I betrayed myself. Some of you have been in my "vault" with the collection, and I have programmed her fingerprint into the lock, so the level of trust and acceptance is pretty high now. I'm very lucky I found someone who accepts me the way I am.

Having said that, it is a constant battle to convince her that spending this amount of money on toys is okay. I usually roll out the alternatives: alcohol, drugs, (other) women, etc. We stay on top of our bills and lead a fairly comfortable life so there is little for her to complain about. I also zip it when she comes home with the 150th bag or pair of shoes...

[Kyle]

You have a fingerprint lock?! :eek: This is now something I'll keep in mind if I ever build my dream house... :)

[GoktimusPrime]

My collecting predates my dating years, and always came first! It was no secret and she just had to live with it or move on.
+1 QFT: Same here!

I did have one ex-gf who didn't take it well - she only ever saw collecting TFs as a childish hobby (despite the fact that she liked collecting Ultraman PVCs and Winnie The Pooh plushies (-_-) - she also collected shoes and expensive brand clothes) - so I just didn't bring TFs up again around her... thought that I could make her come around later, but the relationship didn't survive long enough for that to be a concern. In the end, TFs won. :D

Some Perth users here would've met another one of my ex-gfs who's a Transfan herself, so that was absolutely no problem. At the time we were dating she had 100+ TFs in her collection. We would actually go on TF hunting trips as part of our dates and even attended a Nexus Fair fan meet together once. :)

Yeah, usually when I'm in the early stages of dating, I tell them straight up that I collect TFs and that I'm a fan. Forget the "nostalgia" thing, I tell them that I do play with my toys - it's a reality of my fandom and they have to accept it if they're going to be with me in the long run. When I was still just friends with my wife, I told her that I collecting TFs, so she'd already known about it by the time we became an item.


Having said that, it is a constant battle to convince her that spending this amount of money on toys is okay. I usually roll out the alternatives: alcohol, drugs, (other) women, etc. We stay on top of our bills and lead a fairly comfortable life so there is little for her to complain about.
*sigh* Unfortunately this is true for me too - well I don't know if our lives as quite as comfortable as yours; my profession just doesn't pay that well (I wish it did! She's also a full time student atm so I'm the sole breadwinner) - but we do stay on top of our payments etc. so I'm always telling her that she shouldn't complain about it so long as my hobby doesn't directly interfere with our living; i.e.: we can pay our bills, mortgage etc. and never have to live off instant ramen a la liegeprime's signature. :p


I also zip it when she comes home with the 150th bag or pair of shoes...
Ditto, 'cept mine buys clothes (she actually doesn't collect shoes, which I'm glad for :)).

-----------------------
P.S.: I did once have a gf who was from a very religious family who believed that action figures were evil and demonic. She was my only gf who tried to convince me to stop collecting and get rid of my TFs (her younger brother was also disallowed from things like Harry Potter because they considered such things to be evil). One of her cousins used to play with TFs when he was younger but told me that he and his brother were only ever allowed to have Autobots because they were "heroic" - their parents would never allow them to buy an "evil" Decepticon. So in the end they just made their Autobots have civil wars against each other (e.g. Aerialbots vs Protectobots etc.)! I did try to point out to her parents that this was all fiction once... that exercise was about as fun as headbutting a brick wall, yay. ^^;

[sideswipes brother]

When i first met my wife 5 years ago she encouraged it and even bought me a few but now that i have 2 kids and mortgage she hates it and wants me to stop. Like Hell!!!

[kup]

The last girl I went out with actually got me into collecting.

She wanted to go to Target to shop for clothes since that was borring as hell for me I decided to look around in the toy section. At that point I was a bit hyped about Beast Wars since I had just finished watching the DVDs that I recently bought (last time I saw the series I was in year 9) and I was delighted to see 10th Anniversary Beast Wars figures and an MP-02 Ultra Magnus! At this point I wasn't keeping up with toy news so they were a complete surprise for me, particularly Magnus (A white Prime? WTF? :p).

I stood there for ages wanting to buy them but I still had the stigma of 'Toys are for kids' bull crap that my father had previously hammered into my head. The girl came looking for me and saw me staring at the toys, I told her that I really wanted them but that I shouldn't be buying kid's toys. She just said "If you want them, buy them!" So I did and 2-3 years later I have hundreds of them :)

[SofaMan]

It's funny - my partner and I have been together for a bit over 13 years. We actually started going out while my collecting was on hiatus (between about 1991-1996), where I just lost interest for a while. I got back in when Beast Wars came out in 1997.

It all just kind of ramped up from there - she's never really understood it, but she's pretty supportive overall. I never really had to break it to her - one day I just had all of these toys, and she had to adjust. :)

[Bartrim]

I was quite lucky as I was well and truly into a long term relationship when I restarted collecting. She must of been cool with it as we are now married with a kid and a mortgage. The Australian dream :D

[Defcon]

For me this is an interest/hobbie which I'm passionate about. Another interest is I paint, mostly landscapes, trees and animals. Other hobbies such as painting miniatures have falled to the wayside, as they chew up alot of time. Overall i'm a fairly creative person and its part of my nature.

Anyway the point is having or starting a relationship, its essential to express your passions and interests, some will appeciate that and will like you more for it. Just need to have a sort of balance , family, work, money, hobbies, food, sleep etc. and you will do fine :)

[k.wong23]

Now none of you have any chance of group related activities with her best friend.

I think my gf found out after she kept seeing my room start to fill with more and more, she doesn't mind though :)

[Tallestblue]

The second date I had with my guy he bought me Metroplex and Soundwave from cybertron. I think that's when I knew he was a keeper. He loves that i get Transformers and I've bought him a couple of Battlestar Galactica figures as well. He loves them, or at least says he does to humour me...

[GoktimusPrime]

I think my gf found out after she kept seeing my room start to fill with more and more, she doesn't mind though
Like Tiby and many others, my TF collecting long pre-dated my interest in having a relationship with a significant other, after all, it was 1984 and I was knee-high to a Hobbit. ;)


The second date I had with my guy he bought me Metroplex and Soundwave from cybertron. I think that's when I knew he was a keeper. He loves that i get Transformers and I've bought him a couple of Battlestar Galactica figures as well. He loves them, or at least says he does to humour me...
Awwwwwwwww, that's so sweet! (^O^)

[Golden Phoenix]

The second date I had with my guy he bought me Metroplex and Soundwave from cybertron. I think that's when I knew he was a keeper. He loves that i get Transformers and I've bought him a couple of Battlestar Galactica figures as well. He loves them, or at least says he does to humour me...

God I wish my girlfriend would do something like that....

[Tiby]

When i first met my wife 5 years ago she encouraged it and even bought me a few but now that i have 2 kids and mortgage she hates it and wants me to stop. Like Hell!!!

Ah yes. The old: "It's okay. He'll change or grow out of it"! The futile hope that women have clung to since the beginning of time!

You can count on us for support!

[Autocon]

Some Perth users here would've met another one of my ex-gfs who's a Transfan herself, so that was absolutely no problem. At the time we were dating she had 100+ TFs in her collection. We would actually go on TF hunting trips as part of our dates and even attended a Nexus Fair fan meet together once.


huh?:confused: who is she??

im not looking into a gf at present, still havin ma fun ;) so it doesnt really bother me yet

[turtle boy]

It was finding out about my TFs addiction that got her interested in me in the first place, so there was no fear of having to tell her about the 'hobby'.
Yes, toys are a chick magnet... :cool: :p


Very true. My ex from 2 relationships ago, thought my liking of tfs was lame untill she saw my room. Then she wanted them, before we broke up she was collecting, as far as I know, she stopped collecting, but still has the toys.

last ex, didn't care, not one bit.

The one I'm seeing now, said "your not all geek, you have posters of girls on your walls and can fix my car, ride a skateboard and do other things"

But they were all interested in the fact that I wasn't scared to show off my child inside me and have my collection on show so every one can see them.:)

[GoktimusPrime]

huh? who is she??
Someone you probably don't know. Long-time Perth fans know who she is. :)

[JuzMel]

stares at JuzMel...does Yong remember Transformers?

Hehehehe funny, I just bump into this thread today... Interesting... :) Yeah he does bro, he even told me he used to have G1 starscream, optimus prime, bumblebee etc and was gonna go home and scout the storage for me. But I think his mum cleared and gave them away some years ago. :(
----------------------------------------------------------
Anyway on my part, I didn't have to "break" the news of the collection, my BF basically went with me to Kmart to look for Legends Movie Bumblebee. I promised to only buy one, but then Kmart started their sale and then I bought another and another and the rest was history. He used to sit down with me to play and transform the figures with me. But then nowadays, there has gotten to be too many of them that even I myself haven't had time to open all. :D

But when I do open them and I have difficulty transforming them, I usually pass it to him to try. :o I know I know it's embarrassing that a TF fan doesn't know how to transform a TF herself. (But it rarely happens :p) And he does buy me TF stuff that I want too sometimes. - like he got me Masterforce DVDs.

I guess it's not so much a huge issue with your partner, if they love you they should accept you for who you are. I know friends of mine who shake their heads in dismay when they see my collection as well. It's like they don't understand why I love TFs and want to buy so many of them. Unless a person has their own collection hobby of their own, its hard for them to understand.

[heroic_decepticon]

I've been with my better half for almost 4 years now and she still does'nt know about my toy collection... But I've slowly been getting her use to the idea of my transformer obsession... So I think I'll be holding off telling her for a while yet about all my figures.

you might like to invest in body amour now for when you are finally going to tell her... and stay away from the kitchen and anywhere sharp objects are readily at hand... :D

[Hereticpoo]

Hypothetical

Riddle me this;

Your well into the relationship, its serious.

She says "I don't want you to buy anymore TF's, its me or them" :D

Do you:

A) Stare at her blankly, then casually pick up your phone, call Kyle and say "Do you want to go TF shopping and then maybe a strip club"

or

B) Give up your TF's, Arc weld a shackle to your neck, and ask her to take you shopping for groceries.

Only the tough questions around here! :D




so i told my girlfriend about the whole TF thing today

she took it better then i expected

She said she knew there was a live movie and that was about it

and she asked me why i loike em
i said it was the whole nostaligia thing from my kiddy days

and she was ok with it, she made a joke later on about action figures

So, im super interested in how you broke, or didnt to your special friends about yer super best hobby, i promise im interested, i wont fall asleep :p;)

[TheDirtyDigger]

at which point she mentioned that for a guy who drives a really nice sports car (since sold *sniff* :( ), goes clubbing (haven't been in while *sniff* :( ), and goes shopping all the time, I sure had some "unique" hobbies. She thought that I didn't look like the typical comics/toy collector type and that I hid it really well.

Haha Fungal you sound like a Canadian dude we read about a while back. Did you ever enter a TF trivia contest?

[heroic_decepticon]

Hypothetical

Riddle me this;

Your well into the relationship, its serious.

She says "I don't want you to buy anymore TF's, its me or them" :D

Do you:

A) Stare at her blankly, then casually pick up your phone, call Kyle and say "Do you want to go TF shopping and then maybe a strip club"

or

B) Give up your TF's, Arc weld a shackle to your neck, and ask her to take you shopping for groceries.

Only the tough questions around here! :D

Or 'Why didn't you tell me earlier?'

[swoop]

you might like to invest in body amour now for when you are finally going to tell her... and stay away from the kitchen and anywhere sharp objects are readily at hand... :D

Nah, she'll just get me while I'm asleep:(

[1orion2many]

:)Telling my current wife about my TF collecting was the least of my problems when I met her. Telling her my age was more of a problem:D. (13 years my junior:o). "This is my hobby which I enjoy" I said and ever since then all she is wanting to do is play with my big one(Fort Max people:p:D)

[Hereticpoo]

:)Telling my current wife about my TF collecting was the least of my problems when I met her. Telling her my age was more of a problem:D. (13 years my junior:o). "This is my hobby which I enjoy" I said and ever since then all she is wanting to do is play with my big one(Fort Max people:p:D)


13 years! You sly old dog! Good work! :D

[GoktimusPrime]

Hypothetical

Riddle me this;

Your well into the relationship, its serious.

She says "I don't want you to buy anymore TF's, its me or them"

Do you:

A) Stare at her blankly, then casually pick up your phone, call Kyle and say "Do you want to go TF shopping and then maybe a strip club"

or

B) Give up your TF's, Arc weld a shackle to your neck, and ask her to take you shopping for groceries.

Only the tough questions around here!
...or ask her why she wants you to stop collecting and negotiate from there. My wife's main objection to my collecting is that it does cost a lot of money. So I budget myself carefully so that we don't end up living off instant noodles. So long as it never gets that bad I'm giving her less of an excuse to complain about it. :p

Basically so long as your hobby doesn't effect your partner in a direct detrimental way, then I don't see the big deal about it. :)

[heroic_decepticon]

My wife's main objection to my collecting is that it does cost a lot of money. So I budget myself carefully so that we don't end up living off instant noodles. So long as it never gets that bad I'm giving her less of an excuse to complain about it. :p

Basically so long as your hobby doesn't effect your partner in a direct detrimental way, then I don't see the big deal about it. :)

When a hobby is concerned, I think that most times, its more than just about the money or lack of it. Just because budgeting is fine does not necessarily mean it is no longer a big deal.

I mean ladies (or guys for that matter) can get picky about a whole of bunch of things. Budgeting so that we don't spend beyond our means may just be one issue. There could also be issues like (1) us spending more time on TFs (either through playing, toy hunting, eBaying, forums, etc) than with our partners; (2) us preferring a TF related activity than say something more 'partner' orientated like a walk in the park or a picnic; or (3) etc.

I think another major issue is that hobbies tend to take one's attention away from one's partner and if it adds to an unreasonable amount, it becomes unacceptable (to them). And I mean attention not just time- because you can be spending time with a person and yet have your attention focused on Transformers or talking only about Transformers. That in itself is also 'direct and detrimental' notwithstanding the budgeting and money spent issue.

[Hereticpoo]

Yeah cool but this is what I'm asking:

Its a young Relationship, You're given an absolute Ultimatum, There's no compromise, you must change, it doesn't even have to be TF's, its something you love. A or B?

I'm an A man. B if its Megan Fox or Rachel Taylor :D

[Vector Sigma 13]

Leaving my OP voice changer helmet on when i go to bed gave it away a bit... lol.

-Just tell the other party that you used to collect gobots and theyll understand.

[Vector Sigma 13]

well sometimes you dont have any choice about telling your missus about your obsession especially when your bedroom used to look like this and then the next morning ;) she asks why do you like Transformers so much?



http://i289.photobucket.com/albums/ll214/Loophole83/P4090354.jpg

FYI normally there would of been a coulple more TF posters on the wall in the above pic


Where did that Predaking poster come from - i want one!

[Tiby]

Hypothetical

Riddle me this;

Your well into the relationship, its serious.

She says "I don't want you to buy anymore TF's, its me or them" :D

Do you:

A) Stare at her blankly, then casually pick up your phone, call Kyle and say "Do you want to go TF shopping and then maybe a strip club"

or

B) Give up your TF's, Arc weld a shackle to your neck, and ask her to take you shopping for groceries.

Only the tough questions around here! :D

A. And that is my professional opinion!

Qualifications summary here: http://www.kells.com.au/index.pl?page=244

[Fungal Infection]

Haha Fungal you sound like a Canadian dude we read about a while back. Did you ever enter a TF trivia contest?

Hell no!! And unlike that butt pirate, I'd never brag about being a TF Trivia king!

[Kyle]

Hypothetical

Riddle me this;

Your well into the relationship, its serious.

She says "I don't want you to buy anymore TF's, its me or them" :D

Do you:

A) Stare at her blankly, then casually pick up your phone, call Kyle and say "Do you want to go TF shopping and then maybe a strip club"

or

B) Give up your TF's, Arc weld a shackle to your neck, and ask her to take you shopping for groceries.

Only the tough questions around here! :D


A. And that is my professional opinion!

Qualifications summary here: http://www.kells.com.au/index.pl?page=244

I would listen to the professionals' opinions. Remember if you go TF shopping (AND more importantly a strip club) don't forget me! :D



13 years! You sly old dog! Good work! :D

Reminds me of my cousin who used to "pick up" Year 11/12 girls. When the girls found out he was in fact still in Year 8 they didn't take it too well. :)

[Fungal Infection]

My wife (then girlfriend) had this conversation at the start of our relationship except the difference was she asked me, if I had to make a choice, would it be her or the car (I'm a super car nut). She wasn't actually threatening me just asking it as a hypothetical question. I basically said, "Are you happy at the moment? Are you asking me that question because I am neglecting you or are not giving you the same attention as the car? Do I treat you well?" She answered yes to all those questions and then I replied, "Why are you asking me to make a choice then?" I think as long as you treat her as well as if not better than your hobbies, then she shouldn't expect you to give up anything. And as long as she is happy with the relationship, then theres no need to ask that question either. She's hasn't asked me that question since that day, either about my car (which has since been sold anyway so I guess I answered her question) or my toy collecting hobbies so I guess she's happy (either that or she's planning something very sinister......) :p



Hypothetical

Riddle me this;

Your well into the relationship, its serious.

She says "I don't want you to buy anymore TF's, its me or them" :D

Do you:

A) Stare at her blankly, then casually pick up your phone, call Kyle and say "Do you want to go TF shopping and then maybe a strip club"

or

B) Give up your TF's, Arc weld a shackle to your neck, and ask her to take you shopping for groceries.

Only the tough questions around here! :D

[jacksplatt11]

Remember if you go TF shopping (AND more importantly a strip club) don't forget me! :D

Ya, when is the strip club meet and where is it going to be? Plenty of places in melb

[GoktimusPrime]

I mean ladies (or guys for that matter) can get picky about a whole of bunch of things. Budgeting so that we don't spend beyond our means may just be one issue. There could also be issues like (1) us spending more time on TFs (either through playing, toy hunting, eBaying, forums, etc) than with our partners; (2) us preferring a TF related activity than say something more 'partner' orientated like a walk in the park or a picnic; or (3) etc.

I think another major issue is that hobbies tend to take one's attention away from one's partner and if it adds to an unreasonable amount, it becomes unacceptable (to them). And I mean attention not just time- because you can be spending time with a person and yet have your attention focused on Transformers or talking only about Transformers. That in itself is also 'direct and detrimental' notwithstanding the budgeting and money spent issue.
Absolutely - I totally agree with that. :) This all goes back to previous discussions we've had about when does a hardcore hobby become an unhealthy obsession, and IMHO it's when you become so obsessed and immersed in your hobby that you sacrifice other elements of your life - in effect, you have a minimal (or non-existent) social-life, then that's when it becomes emotionally unhealthy.

Transformers is absolutely an obsession for me - no doubt's there... but at the same time I do like to maintain a social life with friends and with my spouse. All my friends know that I'm obsessed with Transformers and they're cool with it. (^_^)


Its a young Relationship, You're given an absolute Ultimatum, There's no compromise, you must change, it doesn't even have to be TF's, its something you love. A or B?
If it's not a very serious relationship and you're not that committed to the other person... then bugger 'em! Transformers all the way! :D

Disclaimer: I am not a qualified relationships counsellor. ;)

[Hereticpoo]

If it's not a very serious relationship and you're not that committed to the other person... then bugger 'em! Transformers all the way! :D

Disclaimer: I am not a qualified relationships counsellor. ;)

Thats the spirit laddy! :)

[The Scream Man]

Linda knew what she was getting into when she met me, but also expected Id grow out of it. The firt couple of years were rougher than now, but she has slowly and unhappily realised Ill collect toys my whole life.

It wouldnt be so bad if it stopped there, but i buy games and DVD's and comics a lot as well, so she basically hates hw much money i blow on stuff, when she wants to save for a house.

It also depends what I buy. She thinks Saint Seiya and macross are awesome, but isnt to into transformers (Though she likes Masterpiece Skywarp a lot, and doesnt mind the Alternators.). Superhero stuff can go weither way depending on the character.

[Golden Phoenix]

Hypothetical

Riddle me this;

Your well into the relationship, its serious.

She says "I don't want you to buy anymore TF's, its me or them" :D

Do you:

A) Stare at her blankly, then casually pick up your phone, call Kyle and say "Do you want to go TF shopping and then maybe a strip club"

or

B) Give up your TF's, Arc weld a shackle to your neck, and ask her to take you shopping for groceries.

Only the tough questions around here! :D

Mine asked me this as a hypothetical.
I told her, as harsh as it may have been, but I said, that they were a part of my life, they don't consume it, but my collecting is a hobby of mine and it is part of me.
If she didn't like that, I'd be happy to compromise, but I wouldn't get rid of it completely.

Ended up later compromising by agreeing to spend less, which was kind of being done anyway because I had to pay for the dates and typical boyfriend stuff...

[blackie]

mate dates are cheap, just take her to maccas and go to the movies, thats about all i do, ever, and ive been with my woman for 3 years now

still

i was with mine when i started, and if she saw how much i spent i think she would kill me, but i dont think she quite knows....

[Bartrim]

mate dates are cheap, just take her to maccas and go to the movies.

Wow. Do we have anaward for most romantic ozformer? :p

[The Scream Man]

I think if I took Lin to Maccas then a movie she would ask why we're slumming it whne we could be eating somewhere nice and i could have less toys.

Ill stick to taking her nice places....

[Sam]

I didn't really have to tell my wife I liked TFs since she used to watch the cartoons with her brother and told me Ironhide and Bumblebee were her favourite characters.

[JuzMel]

I guess what some of the boys said are logical. i.e to achieve a healthy balance of lifestyle with your partner and TFs and never get too over obsessed or over-spend that you have to struggle.

For guys having problems with their GF/wives/partners, I guess the main thing is to involve them. Woman don't like being lied to, so definitely don't try and hide the fact that you collect TFs.

Involve her by letting her transform and play with some of your TFs. Like Borgeman's better half, Giselle, I could see that day she was oh-so-happy to take part in the transforming game as well. So there, not all girls think playing/collecting TFs are silly.

I didn't used to like to watch soccer or cricket or silly movies, but I started to when the BF just involved me and asked me to watch it together with him. I mean minus the fact that it's hard to find rare gems (like me :o) who love TFs, Lego, Gaming and all the boyish stuff :D, I'm sure you can achieve a reasonable understanding that if she can love her shopping for handbags, clothes, shoes etc, then surely there's no harm with your little TF love. :) Or you can point her in my direction and I "brain-wash" her for you. heeheee... :D

[Robzy]

She wasn't actually threatening me just asking it as a hypothetical question. It's never just a hypothetical question! ;)

[TheHandsomeCrab]

By the time most people find out I collect TFs they're beyond being surprised by anything about me.

[dirge]

If I received a serious ultimatum along the lines of, "Either lose the collection or lose me", I'd choose to keep the collection. Not because I couldn't part with the collection (okay, I couldn't), but because if someone was that determined to change me to fit what she wants from a partner... the relationship is not right anyway.

Asking me to stop/curb spending would be different, for the practical reasons many have touched on. Mind you, I don't spend a lot of TFs now, and the hobby doesn't take up much of my time, since I don't use eBay and tend to just buy stuff by pre-order at places like HLJ.

I didn't actually tell my GF I collect TFs - someone else told her before I even got the chance to mention it. She was actually quite keen to see the collection for herself, and likes the fact that I'm so passionate about stuff (: