TF Comic Collaboration

[Verno]

Here's the Script we'll be working with.

TransWarp: Csirac Issue #1 Final Script

Reading over the script again (in the context that I'm hoping that it is liked by the fandom and other artists will want to come on board to help create the remaining Issues) I decided it was a bit boring, so I've compressed a couple of scenes and added an extra one at the end.

The opening scene with Primal, Rattrap and Rhinox was originally 6 pages, but I'm confident the details will be easily covered in 4.

The countdown was to be 7 pages, which an awful lot of a comic, so I've shortened it to five, which is still a lot but there is method to my madness.

You see, I want the (spoilers alert) TransWarp explosion after a page turn, ie, on an even numbered page, sort of like a mini-reveal. If it's on an odd numbered page, it's already been revealed. Does that make sense?

And I've added what was the first scene of Issue #2 to the end of Issue #1, to add a bit more suspense, and get some dialogue from Silverbolt and Razorclaw, some old G1 favourites which might raise some interest with fans.

Everyone is free to have a read! I'd love some feedback, especially from comic book fans, as I'm somewhat in over my head here as I'm not well versed in Comic book formatting and such.

[liegeprime]

That's a nice script Verno.... best of luck Sam!

[Paulbot]

Now I didn't actually read this too closely, but I wondered if you have tried storyboarding these pages like you did with your spotlight.

It does seem like you're going for few panels and speech bubbles per page which does put quite a lot more emphasis on the artist. Like page 14 to 16 for instance only have two panels each, which will dillute the big full page moment on page 17. You probably should aim for a minimum of 3 rows of panels per page (even if it's only one panel a row) so that big moments that "break the grid" stand out more.

[Verno]

Cheers Liege

A minimum of 3 panels per page, that's probably good advice. I get what you mean about making 17 a bigger moment then.

I was going to try and avoid story-boarding if I could as I've been doing most of it in my head. But I guess a few rough ideas jotted down wouldn't hurt. I didn't want to impinge on the artists creativity, but I'm making them do all the work with no guidance.

Cheers again Paul

[Paulbot]

It can be a balancing act, and you don't need to give the artists storyboards. In fact you don't even need to say Panel 1 Panel 2. Maybe give them a bit more freedom by just explaing the key things you want to happen on each page and let them work how to do it. Kind of what's called the Marvel-method - where the writer does the plot, the artist draws, and the writer puts in the words that fit (they may not do that much anymore, but in the 60s and 70s it was very common).

Take page one, here's a take on your description that different artists could illustrate in many ways.

Page 1:

It's just after Coming of the Fuzors part 2 aboard the Axalon with Optimus Primal and Rhinox. Primal is still getting used to his new Transmetal form. Rhinox shows Optimus the device that was used to collect his spark, it's within a large chamber in the ship. Rattrap is present too (Transmetal form too) but we only notice him when appears and makes a snide remark to which Optimus tells him (friendly/angrily) to shut up.

You can include the dialogue too or if you're willing to be flexible with it, leave it out and fit it in once you see the art. Someone could make that a splash page, someone might make it a grid of 16 panels. It's more flexible.

[Verno]

... Much to learn I still have.