Corvus
G'Day Everyone.
As you may or might not know, I've spent the last few months compiling my TransWarp story and am now looking for artists to help bring the first issue of TransWarp: Csirac to life.
The good news is that I've now got one artist on board. He goes by channandeller on deviantART, and for those that remember back to the TAAU days, he was known as Ravage.
The bad news is there is no way he can do all the artwork on his own (nor could I ask that much of him). So, in order to spruke up some interest in my work, I've decided to draft a story for the TF: Mosaic dudes in the hope I can piggy-back on their project to try and help me find artists.
To do this, I need to write a one-shot story. My answer, was Corvus. But I need some help first.
I'll post the mock up of the script in a comic sort of format below. I need to know if the story makes sense. As I can't draw to save my life, the panels are left blank, but I'll describe what I envisage in each one, hopefully that will help.
But first - context!
If you've read my works in the past you know I'm of the belief that the Tripredacus Council are ex-members of the Cybertronian Empire. They were on a scouting mission when their ship was hit by an asteroid and they were rescued by an alien who is building a huge, planet-sized space station/weapon.
Long story short, the alien's race was wiped out by the Cybertronian Empire and is building the gigantic weapon to battle the CE at the Hub, but Unicron's essence has begun to take over the station. He tortures the CE survivors, corrupting and reformatting them, killing some in the process. The alien helps them escape, but one ex-CE troop decides to stay, because he now loves Unicron. He changed his name to Corvus, and kills the alien.
And now, on to the one-shot, which takes place a few weeks after the above events.
Panel 1 - Close up of Corvus' head.
Panel 2 - From behind Corvus, looking out a huge window onto Space, which is filled with debris from thousands of destroyed mechanized worlds - the debris from the destroyed Hub (See Furman's Alignment story)
Note - The rounded speech bubbles are for Corvus. The square ones are Unicron (but we don't know it's Unicron yet)
Panel 3 - A shot of Cybertron from Space. And perhaps a lay-over of an injured Optimus Prime.
Panel 4 - Another shot of the debris floating in front of huge bay doors which begin to open, thus the sound effect.
Panel 5 - Bad-ass looking Cybertronians. Unicron Cultists.
Panel 6 - A long range shot of Unicron (finally revealed in full, though his form is different, only half built and stuff. Think like the Death Star at the end of Episode 3) as he begins to devour debris. And a streak of light flies away from the huge form (Corvus on his way to Cybertron).
What do you all think? I need feedback.
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) I think panel 5 should be made a little smaller to allow panel 6, the big reveal, to have more prominence. Perhaps the dialogue in that panel could be one on top of another rather than Corvus's dialogue on one side and Unicron's on the other? Just a suggestion.
) is the editors rejecting the idea because it isn't set in established canon. Unicron's return, the Tripredacus Council being of Cybertronian Empire heritage, even the destruction of the Hub are all events that haven't officially happened or been made reference to before.
