When collecting TFs becomes a selfish obsession...

[STL]

Look Jay and STL, fair enough you want to defend yourselves. No one says what you all have done is wrong. But it brings down to the fact about what Paulbot says again, "When we see that someone (or in this case two people) have bought up a large number of the toys it decreases the chance of us finding them on the hunt."

As much as people who appreciates what Jay has done, they are ALSO those who are NOT HAPPY with the "clearing of shelves" and "tower of same item" photos.

Trust me, I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE. But I was the only one who expressed it.

Oh yeah right, then how come you had 2 sets of the TRU Comic 2-Packs and you wouldn't let Icy have 1 set first the other time?

I'm not going to reply to each of these, Mel. You need to read my post and focus on the larger issues, some of the points that I've tried to raise. It becomes too easy to absorb oneself in the details, in one's own disappointment and not see the larger issues. Issues of kindness and reciprocation. Issues of what this community actually is. Issues of imposing expectations and then guilt on others. We are all here for more than just the acquisition of toys and this has saddeningly been lost sight of.

Oh just a gentle note, what happened to your signature with:
Need 18 Acid Storms cheap! Pls help!

I think it unnecessary that I delve into it but since you feel it should be explained. In Christmas' gone by I've spent more on kids and families who live in shelters or are disadvantaged. In years gone by I have bought microwaves, toys and air conditioning units for people. This year, Christmas is rapidly approaching and I feel deeply disappointed in myself for spending less than I normally do and aim to change that. That is why I am putting the hunt for Acid Storm on hiatus. It says as much in my signature. I have mentioned this before today. Christmas is a time to help those truly unfortunate. And out in society, there are those that have no home. To continue my expensive hunt for Acid Storms would mean I can't focus on doing my bit. I try to do a bit every day, when I can, when I get the opportunity to help another person. And its one of the things that I do w/out expectation of reciprocation. I've seen a lot in my life and while I've been financially fortunate - not for a moment do I ever forget those less fortunate. Especially in times such as these. You'll be surprised by how many people will just be satisfied to have a smoked leg of ham on Christmas eve. My little sister's birthday is on Christmas eve and there was one year I got back late b/c I was out at a shelter but I was never fussed b/c sometimes our own happiness doesn't come first - especially when there are other people out there who really need us.

Also I didn't like people using verses like "Mel, you should ..., Mel I think it this"... etc. It's like you're trying to pint point me down and bully me saying it's my fault or something. I have never in my previous post directly use anyone's names.

I'm sorry that you feel that way but since it was you who initiated this thread, I felt it important to try and address your concerns. I hope that you read my post again, and can appreciate what kindness truly is.

In the first place, I have explained VERY CLEARLY, I was all over about the issue on Animated Jetfire and Jetstorm.

Are you really? The tone of this post remains resentful and I only hope that you understand the points I have made. I think they are pertinent and that subsuming guilt and obligation into this board is dangerous.

Whatever it is, my point has been made and thanks to the people who understand and feel the same way. I'm gonna ask mods to close this thread.

I don't particularly agree with that. Now that its out in the open and you feel you've said everything you've had to say, the thread should be closed just because you've had enough? Others are trying to help you see another point of view, to open your mind to perspective, to help you not feel so upset in the first place by. This forum isn't just a place where once you've had enough to say on a topic, to say it should be closed. I really do hope that you can appreciate the core of points that I've tried to make. I don't want to restate them again so I'll just it below.

When we help, when we exercise the capacity for human kindness it is not a baton with which we wield to procure acts of kindness. It loses sight of what kindness is. Kindness is more than just a phone call, more than just a text, more than just buying a fellow collector a newly released Transformer. Kindness is about our capacity to give unconditionally, to help make this community, this world a better place. I have done many years of community service but never do I hold it over someone else’s head. Not always has my kindness been reciprocated. Sometimes I never meet people I help again. Such as people I help take groceries out to the car or buy a meal for. But that doesn’t matter because what truly mattered was that in a window, in a small window in that person’s life, was I able to do something kind. Kindness is about what you can give, not what you can give in return. It should not have strings of guilt and obligation attached to it.

Sometimes we lose sight of the fact that this is a community that hinges on people’s good faith, people’s capacity for kindness. Sometimes the chips fall our way, sometimes they do not. We have all been on the receiving end of kindness but it is never intended to be personal when a person misses out.

Get over it.

This isn’t about you. This isn’t about anyone. And it never was. And nor should it be. The wonder of this community lies in its ability to bring people together, to generate an atmosphere where would-be strangers come together because a common interest, a place to share in their love of Transformers – whatever form that may assume.

To limit it to the undivided assistance of others to the acquisition of toys, would constitute a sad departure from the glue that holds this place together, that makes this place a fun place to be, that makes this place a worthwhile place to be. There is and should be more that brings us together as a community and the day we lose sight of that, we lose sight of what really matters.

[Paulbot]

This thread is closed. I have let it stay open only so Mel could respond to STL's post and STL now has responded again. I don't feel there's any need for this to continue to be open.

Mel has already stated quite clearly she wants to move on.

Should any of the other parties involved wish to post a follow up please contact me.