TF Hardwired (Keepers Trilogy novels)

[Paulbot]

I think the way they are handling human deaths in TF fiction is fine. Showing graphic human deaths in Transformers fiction is childish and puerile.

As can reading about them: I couldn't finish that so-called novel "Hardwired" from a few years ago. It's generally a bad book but the humans-die-in-graphic-ways-so-you-know-this-is-grown-up stuff was the tipping point.

[GoktimusPrime]

*shudder* I forced myself to read part of that book but I've yet to finish it. Years later it still sits on my TF bookshelf with a bookmark in it. I find it hard to motivate myself to finish reading that atrocity of a story.
WhY mY ShOuLdErS hUrT?

I don't necessarily object to gore, violence, nudity, sex, adult themes etc. in comics so long as it's used well as part of telling the story. Although admittedly it wouldn't bode well in a Transformers comic as it would be seen as excluding younger readers. It can still be done but needs to be more subtle/suggestive rather than explicit.

And honestly, when it comes to the actual Transformers themselves, the gore and violence is actually incredibly explicit! They manage to get away with it because they're robots. The image where Bludgeon is trying to tear his own face off to escape from his Pretender shell is pretty gross.

[Sky Shadow]

As can reading about them: I couldn't finish that so-called novel "Hardwired" from a few years ago. It's generally a bad book but the humans-die-in-graphic-ways-so-you-know-this-is-grown-up stuff was the tipping point.

Since neither Paulbot nor Gok seemed to be able to finish 'Hardwired', here's an old 'fanfic' review I wrote of it to help fill in the blanks:

*Hardwired* by Scott Ciencin.

--

‘"You need to hear this, Optimus," Sentinel Prime said calmly. "You were chosen to fail. Chosen by Megatron himself."' (Ciencin, p. 16.)

--

As first-chapter revelations go, the one above, from *Transformers: Hardwired* by Scott Ciencin, is arguably better than almost anything in the realm of fanfiction, and therein lies one of the quandaries I find surrounding this book. Is it really, as seems to be the general consensus of Transfandom, a bad novel and, if so, is it any good if we look at it as a fanfic?

There are two misspellings within the first 200 words of *Corrosion of War Without End* ("attendent" and "infinate"). This is completely understandable, since it was written by a very young Robert Powers and quite possibly even before the advent of spellcheckers. However, the story's typos have never stopped it from being acclaimed by our fandom as one of the greatest Transformers ‘fics of all time, so is it justifiable to criticise *Hardwired* on the pretence of it having clearly been proofread by an alcoholic penguin and a potplant.

Well. . . perhaps. Unlike fanfic writers, Mr. Ciencin has clearly been paid to write this novel and, unlike fanfiction, we have paid to read it and thus have the right to expect a certain level of quality. On the other hand, while I had, say, a lifetime to write *Best First* any way I wanted, *Hardwired* was obviously written to a deadline and to certain specifications (i.e. within the Dreamwave universe as it existed at the end of the first G1 miniseries) and as such I find it strangely impressive. On the other hand, there are some rather unprofessional aspects the novel, most memorably that there are three characters named Paul: Paul Whitmore, Paul Buckley and Paul Charteris. This could, of course, be a clever satirical jibe at Transformers name reuse, ‘Paul' being very similar to ‘Prowl.' Or maybe ‘Paul' is Ciencin's placeholder name for male human characters and he just forgot to go back and fill it in with something different at about the same time as he forgot to proofread the novel. Or maybe it's utter stupidity. Whatever it is it's the most annoying reuse of the same name in a book since Jane Austen's quadruple usage of ‘John' in *Sense and Sensibility*.

So when wondering whether *Hardwired* can be read as a fanfic we need to ask: is Ciencin even a fan? On one hand there is some impressive characterisation and general knowledge of the characters (although weapons often seem to have been randomly assigned rather than Transformers having their trademark munitions.) There are also some good fannish likes, like Bumblebee's gestaltism "quip" when he runs into Bonecrusher: "Well, well. . . Does the right arm know what the left arm is doing out on its own?" The lack of ‘obscurist' fan references and small cast of ‘original' Transformers characters also makes the novel a far more appropriate entry-level read than the average fanfic.

The quotation at the beginning of this review tells that while Megatron unwittingly created his own nemesis in the cartoon by killing Orion Pax, in the *Hardwired* universe, Megatron somehow deliberately prejudiced the matrix to choose Optronix, a "glorified /librarian/ to lead" (p. 13.) the Autobots. The Megatron in the novel seems to have been like a shepherd, herding Optimus Prime and his Autobots where he wanted them "for four million years" (p. 1.) (yes, while *our* Megatron wasted his time sleeping in a volcano, Ciencin's apparently "raged" his war with Optimus Prime.) It's not just Prime who suffers through the revelation of Megatron's manipulation: Bluestreak was only the sole survivor of Praxus because Megatron thought there was no good in "a cautionary tale if no one if (sic) left alive to tell it?" Bluestreak finally realises that every time he "told the tale, every time digital recordings were broadcast about their world of the destruction, images lifted from his own retina storage banks, he had spread terror and furthered the cause of his hated enemy." (p. 71.) Similarly, even if *Hardwired* Megs was not a gladiator (as he was in the U.K. comics) he still knows exactly how to play to a crowd. "They adore me. They worship me. They know that I will keep them safe" (p. 152) Megatron says to Prime of the humans, "They fear you, and with good reason. You don't have what it takes to protect them. You never did and you never will."

--

Standing as still as he could, despite his fear, Paul asked, "Have you looked upon the face of God? Out there, in the emptiness, have you seen Him?"

Starscream laughed. "Only in my /reflection/, child."

(p. 253.)

--

From its literal content to its characterisation of Starscream, this quote is perfect and encapsulates the religious themes of the novel. Most apparently this can be seen in a flashback from chapter 17 where, like the scientist he had been in the cartoon before the war, Starscream seeks "to learn. . . to understand" Catholicism (p. 250.) Starscream wants "a better understanding of theology, a glimpse into the heart and soul of human belief, a thing he couldn't simply assimilate through conventional research" (p. 251.) Later in the novel, Starscream is apparently being manipulated by the embarrassing Wizard-of-Oz-meets-Robot-Master-like plot-device, the teenage Darren Norbert who tells Spike "together, we're going to become gods" (p. 295.) (fortunately it turns out that Soundwave is higher on the food chain than Darren and was "merely using his power and influence" to rescue Megatron from the Keepers and humiliate Starscream.) Just as the Transformers are like gods to the humans, to the Transformers it is the mysterious Keepers who are godlike. Like Adam and God, Megatron says to the Keepers "Upgrade me in your image." (p. 276.) There's a *Paradise Lost* moment when the Keepers rescind their ‘gift' of letting the humans relive their greatest dreams: "Yet they went back to the walls, they tried again and again to reclaim paradise. It had been there once, why couldn't it come again?" (p. 244.) It's a nice look at the human condition, like when you're in a relationship that's turned sour and futilely and stubbornly remain in it in a desperate attempt to reclaim what used to be so wonderful about it like a guinea pig that keeps getting electrically shocked in some sort of aversion therapy experiment even though the beauty is gone and will never ever ever be back again.

Or maybe that's just me. ;-)

Anyway. . . it's not just Christian religious imagery in the novel: the machine/god theme is likely combined at Caesar's Palace where there are "Animatrons of the Roman gods." (p. 293.) Like the Roman gods, the Transformers can be both benevolent and destructive forces of nature and the Followers are a group of humans who "appear to worship the Autobots as gods" (p. 25). And (unless I'm just too close to one of my own fanfics - *Christmas Especial*, which [quick plug] can be found here: http://www.transformersfanfic.com/vi...2677&chapter=1 ) there even appears to be a nod to Ozymandias by Percy Shelley: "Gaze at what we have done and despair." (p. 304.)

--

Starscream: Who needs to rule the world when you can be a /god/ in a city that's a world onto (sic) itself?

(p. 64.)

--

In *Hardwired*, Starscream takes over Las Vegas and. . . erm. . . turns it into his own reality T.V. show. For the Vegas humans, Big Brother is watching, and when BB is Soundwave, he isn't "only listening to the conversations of the bad guys. . . he was listening to everyone!" (p. 205) "Soundwave could hear every thought they had and every statement they made." (p.308) and Ciencin does a good job of really making this felt through the novel. The restructuring of the Vegas police department is intriguing: Starscream gives "every cop in the city" a ten thousand dollar bonus and a pay rise." The "watchbirds" (p. 209) Laserbeak and Buzzsaw and "watchers' (p. 199.) Ravage and Soundwave are the "eyes and ears" of the New Vegas police force. Ah, but (to paraphrase Juvenal): who watches the watchbirds? ;-)

The concept of inferiority is also prevalent throughout the book. Despite the theme of Starscream-as-God, he's still very much like Lucifer, the brightest star in the heavens, yet repeatedly still in the shadow created by Megatron. The Optimus Prime in the novel "should never have been Prime at all" (p. 14.) and, like Rodimus in Op's shadow in the third season cartoon, it's Optimus who feels the burden of inferiority through most of *Hardwired* until he. . . erm. . . somehow battles Sentinel Prime to the death and symbolically steps "over the shattered wreckage." (p. 226).

--

Optimus: I'm fine. Just going to need a new paint job when this is
all said and done.
Jazz: Well, if that's all you need when this is over then I'd say you
got off lightly.

(p. 315.)

--

‘Hardwired' is a total oil-and-bloodbath. Any human who finds him or herself in the novel must feel like a Transformer from last-year's catalogue in a Marvel anniversary special: very mortal indeed. The human casualties are almost innumerable, and even those who have entire sections built up around their character are often unlikely to survive their chapter (Ryan O'Brien being the most notable example. Great chapter though: seeing the Transformers through the eyes of humans is where this novel really shines above previous Transformers fiction.) *Hardwired* has also seen some controversy over its Transformer deaths which (as one who grew up with the U.K. comics and the Movie) seems rather odd, but yes: Jazz kills Bluestreak, and Sideswipe picks a (fatal) fight with Devastator. I think it's great. If the Autobot Cars are going to start removing *themselves* from the ‘genepool' then who am I to argue (and why stop there when Inferno, Red Alert, Blurr and Hot Rod are still at large?) ;-) There's one death in the novel that I, perhaps more than anyone else on the planet, could really, really appreciate, and that was on page 191, where "Spectro exploded in an orange ball of fire. . . Spyglass leapt to his feet and turned, in time to see billowing black smoke swirling above the rippling surface of the burning lake-the only thing left of the Decepticon called Spectro. No, that wasn't true. Upon closer examination, he could see the torso, head and at least one limb of the Decepticon." After everything poor Spectro has already suffered at my hands, Ciencin has added insult (and further injury) to injury. What's particularly amusing is that Spyglass and Viewfinder survive the incident and indeed the whole novel perfectly intact. :-)

There are some really beautiful moments in *Transformers: Hardwired*. Sure, there are some ugly ones too, but I'd honestly be hard pressed to come up with more than a handful of fanfics that would be more appropriate Transformers novels than this one, and even those would require ‘tweaking' for the mass-market. *Hardwired* is not great literature, it's a franchise novel, and though I must admit I'm not too familiar with that genre in general, I assume that the number of malapropisms in *Hardwired* are unusually substandard. Still, it's a proper, published Transformers novel (yay!) and as long as they make them, I'll buy them.

I know *Hardwired* isn't art, but I like it.

[GoktimusPrime]

Saying that this book is better than most fanfics isn't really saying much at all mate. That's like trying to tell someone who hates Beast Machines or Animated that they're "better than Animorphs." d:

Anyway, that review hasn't inspired me to read any more of that book. Maybe I'll finish reading it by time Transformers 3 comes out on DVD, but I wouldn't bet on it.

[Sky Shadow]

Saying that this book is better than most fanfics isn't really saying much at all mate. That's like trying to tell someone who hates Beast Machines or Animated that they're "better than Animorphs." d:

But... but Animorphs, Beast Machines and Animated are all awesome.

Anyway, that review hasn't inspired me to read any more of that book. Maybe I'll finish reading it by time Transformers 3 comes out on DVD, but I wouldn't bet on it.

I can't remember exactly (I wrote it four years ago), but I'm pretty sure I was taking the piss for half of that review anyway.

[GoktimusPrime]

But... but Animorphs, Beast Machines and Animated are all awesome.

I meant Transformers Animorphs. Do you honestly like those toys?
I own a few of them and I still think they're crap!


"Holy F-word! What's going on here? This room is virtually empty! Maybe those Animorphs might know something..."


"Excuse me fellas, you wouldn't happen to know where all the G1 Transformers have disappeared to?"


*WHAM!!*


"................."

[Sky Shadow]

I meant Transformers Animorphs. Do you honestly like those toys?
I own a few of them and I still think they're crap!

Well... Poison Bite is one of my favourite Transformers of all time and he was originally meant to be an Animorph.

All the actual Animorph toys are flawed in some way, but have redeeming features. Mega Ax and Visser Three weren't appalling toys even though they didn't technically transform into anything 'real' except a scorpion. Mega Tobias has great wings. Deluxe Rachel and Tobias are good for kitbashes. But I liked the Animorphs TV show and read the books, since they were 'Transformers' toys and I was intrigued.

[GoktimusPrime]

Anyway, the point I was making is that anything can be good when you have low standards.

(I collected Mutant Beasts too )

[griffin]

Interesting style of review Sky Shadow. I'll never read the book, but I like to hear what others think of it.
And I have to also stick up for Animorphs here, and not because I have the entire short-lived set of TFs toys. I watched every episode, and was really upset when it was axed before it ended, or at least, covered the run of the books. Okay, most of the toys are pretty bad, but I could see some as potential BW toys.

[GoktimusPrime]

The Animorphs stories - as children's stories - aren't bad IMO. But the toys, as a crossover between Transformers and Animorphs was bad to me. Some of the ideas "translated" better in a purely Transformers context (e.g.: Mutant Beasts)... but yeah, the "Transformers Animorphs" toys themselves were pretty forgettable. Just as well I got mine for free.