The Parenting Thread

[Vector Sigma 13]

when did this thread start...i'm not sure if i should take advice from people who buys kids toys

but seriously we fond the babywise method worked well for our kids and considering my oldest is mildly autistic, its been a blessing as routine works well for him..dont believe everything you hear about babywise.

Dont have to actually take the advice...

Nice to hear that we are not the only family on here with a special needs child. My middlest son has Down Syndrome.

[GoktimusPrime]

I find that set routines works well with most kids, not only those with autism/Aspergers - although routine is definitely a big thing with autistic kids and you gotta be careful with introducing changes to their routine. Also depends on the severity of their condition too - some autistic kids handle change better than others. And heck, most adults like set routines too - who here doesn't have their own set routines and quirks? And toy collecting's like a form of OCD - the fact that I blew $25 on a stupid effing Mighty Mugg this week proves that!

[Tabias Prime]

hehehehehe I'm not even that silly to buy a mighty mugg...i think one of the biggest problems with kids and some adults theses days is they don't have routines.it sets boundaries and certainly gives Archer a sense of security on what's happening.. archers at the lower end of the spectrum for autism. it was diagnosed early so he got the help he needed b4 it was to bad.thank you autism association of W.A

[GoktimusPrime]

i think one of the biggest problems with kids and some adults theses days is they don't have routines.it sets boundaries and certainly gives.....a sense of security on what's happening..

Let me shake your hand!

I'm thinking about joining an Australian parenting forum to discuss parenting in further detail. Does anyone have any recommendations?

[shokwave2]

I believe in disciplining kids. A smack always lets a child know whos in charge and it worked with me as a child. I think that's half the reason why so many kids are roaming the streets at night causing trouble, disrespecting the elderly, police, the laws, etc. It all comes back to their parents letting them get away with it.

Although i rarely smack my daughters anymore, only if they're really, really naughty. I've found that i can scare them more and make them do what they're told by getting down to their eye level (they're only 6 and 3) and telling them eye to eye to eat their dinner, etc, in a nice strong, not-too-loud, deep voice. Throw in a threat of throwing out their toys and everything works out fine.

Also the best advice on bringing up kids was from my mother in-law. She said to us "you'll get 1001 tips on how to raise your child, just do whatever feels right to you".

[GoktimusPrime]

Pregnancy, Babies and Children Expo

The Sydney one is coming up next week. Check the link for information about the expo for Brisbane, Perth and Melbourne and get a free ticket! Adelaide already happened last month.

[TheHandsomeCrab]

5. Always let them know who's the boss - if youve been watching supernanny - no matter how she explains it, it boils down to that. The kids are out of control coz the supposed bosses ( parents) of the house are manipulated always to give in to the mewlings of the kids, uh uh.

God I wish I could print this on a hammer and beat people with it. I work in childcare and have no end of problems with this one. There's one kid who was terrible for this when I started working there (he even said once "They're only adults, you don't have to do what they say"..) because his parents have almost no boundaries, spoiled only child etc. I've actually managed to turn him round in the last year and he's mostly a pretty good kid, but the sad part is he respects me more than his own parents. You can already tell he's going to have no end of problems growing up.

Sadly some of the older ones need a better man than me to sort out their issues. Trouble is the parents have let them rule the roost since day 1, by the time they're 8/9 years old it's beyond me to undo that. And the parents always say "I don't know why he acts like this!". Because you're an incompetent mother, you fucking bogan.

[Vector Sigma 13]

I was unfortunate enough to have a bad experience when i took the kids to a "Kids Flix" movie/ fun day (run for families with kids that have kids with disabilities etc) at our local theatre about two months ago. A woman absolutely lost the plot with her son (i think he was around three years of age or so ) because he must have woken her infant son or got restless or something. Mind you there were probably 100 people/kids in the theatre!

Any hoo she decided she was getting out of there so she hooked the toddler up to a strap attached to the pram and proceded to try/ drag the kid and find an exit that she could get the pram out of easily. No luck with that so she draged the kid up the stairs and told him to F$%king sit down and not to F%$king move. She went back down and grabbed the pram and carried it up the stairs (infant was still in it). A elderly woman was coming down the stairs so the mother told her to "get out of the F^%king way you stupid old lady"! Which of course upset the elderly lady somewhat.

So anyway the lady dissapears after her outburst.

Turns out she must have said a few more words to the ushers/staff there. The Police rolled up when we left.

Next thing i know Im watching the local news and find out shes had the kids taken away and shes in the slammer!

No BS i swear to god!

The point of the story i guess is- that she was in a theatre full of kids and crying babies and no one gave a rats arse what her kids were doing! No one would have known the difference- There was probably more too it i suppose and i felt sorry for her in a way.

I was going to offer to help this woman with her pram as were quite a few others but as soon as she lost it they all said stuff that!

If your a parent and your that stressed- either walk away and take five. Or see some sort of help- theres plenty out there. And dont get me wrong- lots of parents can get to that agro stage but the trick is to not let it get to you and deal with it sensibly.

Anyway i just thought id share that experience.

[GoktimusPrime]

...and if you can't handle that kind of responsibility - don't be a parent!. (-_-) I feel your pain guys, and I've seen more than my fair share of awful parenting.

[Vector Sigma 13]

...and if you can't handle that kind of responsibility - don't be a parent!. (-_-) I feel your pain guys, and I've seen more than my fair share of awful parenting.

Im not sure its always as easy as that Gok. I know where your coming from and agree- however some people kinda find themselves becoming parents in some cases. Our first son was not planned (not all forms of contraception are 100% effective) so naturally it was quite a shock!

So here you are becoming a parent with less than 9 months to get used to it! I did get used to it but i wouldnt say it was easy!

I dont like to credit myself but i think im a pretty good dad.

I guess its unfortunate that there are some people who dont care about contraception and create a life that is basically not wanted- they just think they are stuck with the kid and go with it much to their dislike ( I think the woman i spoke about may be in this category but i could be wrong). Then on another hand similar sort of people just keep having the kids because they can get money from the government.

I can imagine you would see plenty of sad cases at your school. Ive got friends/ family in the teaching profession that mention sad examples all the time.
I would assume you (Gok) have done all the child protection/ mandate reporting because of your job and must find it difficult at times to work out whos got issues and who hasnt. Ive done all that stuff through my role as a Scout leader and unfortunately i have been involved with child protection incidents and its not fun. Its sad that kids are put in these situations.