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View Poll Results: What gender is (are) your child(ren)?
Boy(s) 14 41.18%
Girl(s) 5 14.71%
Both (even) 10 29.41%
More boys 3 8.82%
More girls 2 5.88%
Voters: 34. You may not vote on this poll

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  #21  
Old 19th March 2009, 07:41 PM
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Originally Posted by GoktimusPrime View Post
Crap parents = crap kids, Good parents = good kids

And kids are usually much easier to teach when they have good supportive parents who instill them with a strong sense of self-responsibility.
Ah if only common sense was common
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  #22  
Old 20th March 2009, 11:42 AM
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Originally Posted by GoktimusPrime View Post
Yer a suckah for punishment. <friendly.ribbing>

Great to hear such positive comments from people's experience as parents, and very heartwarming to see Bartrim beam with parental pride. Your son sounds like he has an amazing sense of duty and responsibility at such a young age. And you _should_ be proud... in my experience as a teacher I've learnt that in the majority of cases, kids are the way they are because of their parents.

Crap parents = crap kids, Good parents = good kids

And kids are usually much easier to teach when they have good supportive parents who instill them with a strong sense of self-responsibility. So thumbs up to you Bartrim and all other parents who are doing this for their kids! If more parents were like you guys, my job would be a LOT easier.

Thanks Gok. I often have doubts about my parenting ability because my kid has a wild temper when things don't go his way (mainly due to my dad letting him get away with blue murder) but overall he understands right from wrong. He hits or kicks me or deliberately tips his food out he knows he gets 2 minutes in the cot then has to say "sowwy" and give me a cuddle or if he's naughty while we are visiting Grandma and Poppy or Nonna and Nonno that we go straight home.

But I'll continue to try to lead by example and make sure my boy stays an Autobot and doesn't become a decepticon.
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  #23  
Old 20th March 2009, 12:03 PM
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Originally Posted by Bartrim View Post
Thanks Gok. I often have doubts about my parenting ability because my kid has a wild temper when things don't go his way (mainly due to my dad letting him get away with blue murder) but overall he understands right from wrong. He hits or kicks me or deliberately tips his food out he knows he gets 2 minutes in the cot then has to say "sowwy" and give me a cuddle or if he's naughty while we are visiting Grandma and Poppy or Nonna and Nonno that we go straight home.

But I'll continue to try to lead by example and make sure my boy stays an Autobot and doesn't become a decepticon.

I can relate to that. I caught my 2yr old hitting his 9yr old brother then blames his 9yr old brother for hitting him... I send him straight to the timeout area with him kicking and screaming
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  #24  
Old 20th March 2009, 01:51 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GoktimusPrime View Post
Yer a suckah for punishment. <friendly.ribbing>

Great to hear such positive comments from people's experience as parents, and very heartwarming to see Bartrim beam with parental pride. Your son sounds like he has an amazing sense of duty and responsibility at such a young age. And you _should_ be proud... in my experience as a teacher I've learnt that in the majority of cases, kids are the way they are because of their parents.

Crap parents = crap kids, Good parents = good kids

And kids are usually much easier to teach when they have good supportive parents who instill them with a strong sense of self-responsibility. So thumbs up to you Bartrim and all other parents who are doing this for their kids! If more parents were like you guys, my job would be a LOT easier.
That is a generalisation which I consider very poor Gok, once kids reach a certain age their behaviour is more to do with the social group they associate with and less to do with their parents. If you blame parents for everything that there children do i consider you very short sighted(which I don't believe you are).
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  #25  
Old 20th March 2009, 02:00 PM
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Originally Posted by 1orion2many View Post
That is a generalisation which I consider very poor Gok, once kids reach a certain age their behaviour is more to do with the social group they associate with and less to do with their parents. If you blame parents for everything that there children do i consider you very short sighted(which I don't believe you are).
I imagine that could be true but since I only have a 2year old his social circle doesn't really effect his behaviour.

This is the reason as to why I'm scared if we have a daughter. If she grows up to be a pretty and popular (by social standards) teenager then I'm concerned I'll be such an "old fart" not letting her do things that she wants to. Honestly if some of these teenage girls I see when out and about were my daughter I'd be having pink fits.
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  #26  
Old 20th March 2009, 02:03 PM
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I understand you have a younger child bartman but Goks comments were as i said a generalisation which I strongly dislike and disagree with. I wont have any teenage daughters after this year, still have a teenage son.
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  #27  
Old 20th March 2009, 03:55 PM
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Originally Posted by MV75 View Post
Will it blend? Take uncle turtles toys and find out!
Just try it! It's more like daddy turtle atm I look after him all the time and mummy looks after me LOL
If he blended one of my toys, I'd be both very angry and very impressed ahhah.
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  #28  
Old 20th March 2009, 07:05 PM
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I guess parental opinion is relevant to the age of your kids. I find as my three get older (eldest has just turned 5) i have to re adjust my tactics as their character changes/ matures that little bit.

Lol, its good if you like surprises! I must admit though i do look forward to when each child shows a new talent or attitude, keeps life interesting. My eldest is just at that age where he pretty much looks after himself which is quite good.

My middle son has Down syndrome which can throw a few challenges up every once in awhile and although he generally is no different to the others he does have some health issues and is probably a little slower than the others. I tell ya i could write a book about his life journey (and hes only three)! But ive seen some kids that are "normal" which have more issues than he does.

Bartrim, I wouldnt panic too much about the hitting- he may well grow out of it. My five year old went through a stage like that and the two little fellas are are going through it now. They dont call them the terrible twos for nothing!
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  #29  
Old 20th March 2009, 08:53 PM
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Yes, my previous comments were just a very broad generalisation; based on my personal observation and experience - and as a teacher, not a parent. So while I am eager to learn more about the world of parenting I sadly have no experience in this field. Yet.

And I have come across quite a few exceptions to that generalisation, and I honestly do feel very sorry when I see good, caring and very supportive parents at their wit's end dealing with very challenging behaviour from their kids. But in my observation/experience the generalisation is true for the majority of kids I come across. It's not to say that they're all like that though.

I don't blame parents for everything when it comes to kids - ultimately everyone is responsible for themselves - but I think that parents certainly do play a very large role in shaping what kind of person a child will become. I suppose it's the whole "nature vs. nurture" argument.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1orion2many
once kids reach a certain age their behaviour is more to do with the social group they associate with and less to do with their parents.
That's a very good point. Glasser's Choice Therapy basically says not to look at children as necessarily good or bad people, but to examine the choices that they make as good or bad decisions.

I know the frustration of seeing kids make unfortunate decisions despite everything you do for them. But ultimately it's their lives - and they have to live with the consequences of their decisions, for better or worse. That's life. And sometimes kids need to make the wrong decisions in order to learn things (after all, Albert Einstein failed school ).

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1orion2many
still have a teenage son
I have fond memories of meeting your son. Seemed like a decent young man to me.

Last edited by GoktimusPrime; 20th March 2009 at 09:17 PM.
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  #30  
Old 20th March 2009, 10:37 PM
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Originally Posted by 1orion2many View Post
once kids reach a certain age their behaviour is more to do with the social group they associate with and less to do with their parents. If you blame parents for everything that there children do i consider you very short sighted(which I don't believe you are).
You see. For me, when I was growing up, my dad was never around, he was out in his truck paying the bills and all that stuff. Fare enough. But, me not having a farther figure for the first 10 years of my life did affect me, I'll be honest, it did. I wont go into it, but I do blame him in some ways, cause when he was home, all he did was come down from the high that the speed gave him he used to stay awake. And slept until he needed food or to go back to work.

While I was getting older, 12, 13 and 14, I was out with my friends skating, dad didn't see the point of it. So yelled at me for it, and when he did try take interest, he didn't do a very good job, he just nodded and said mmm but never even looked at me or asked questions.
Now from what I remember, I didn't like that at all, and in the end when I actually got attention from him, be it good or bad, I was happy. There was more bad then good cause doing stupid/bad things would get his attention before anything good ever did. So I started to mess up at school, when I went. I lashed out at most people.

Later on in life, the present time, My dad and I are good mates at the best of times, we still argue and i tell him to get f***ed, he does the same, then an hour later we're drinking beer together working on our car, He still hates the skating and the transformers, (only cause it wont benefit him in anyway shape or form... Ever) And he knows it. He still does the fake interest thing, he asks how work was, I tell him, I could stop mid sentence and he wouldn't notice.
But all in all, even though he didn't have anything to do with me for 10 years, another 5 of them years I severely hated him, and now 6 years on, we are mates.

So it's no always the people the child hangs around with, its a whole mess of things that affect them from say 2 years of age up to 16.
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