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Thread: Europa 2017 - Place your bets!

  1. #11
    Join Date
    23rd Sep 2010


    Quote Originally Posted by Lint View Post
    Writeup is the hard part, got about halfway through last night until I went zZz, new target is to release race results tonight!
    it is always very detailed and involved, I can imagine it takes quite some time and effort.
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  2. #12
    Join Date
    7th Apr 2010


    Oh Nuts! Completely forgot to place my bets! Arghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
    WANTED BOTS: G1: Horri-bull, Snarler, Mainframe, Chop Shop, Ransack CHUG: Spin Out, Cordon, Brotropolis Rescue MASTERPIECE: Acid Storm
    ENERGON: Six Shot

  3. #13
    Join Date
    16th Jul 2008


    Quote Originally Posted by CHILENO20 View Post
    Oh Nuts! Completely forgot to place my bets! Arghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
    I can't really do much till the 1yo goes to bed, you can still place your bets!

  4. #14
    Join Date
    7th Apr 2010


    Quote Originally Posted by Lint View Post
    I can't really do much till the 1yo goes to bed, you can still place your bets!
    Okay then As I have some up my sleeve, 25 credits on each for the win and the remaining 25 on the trifecta of Blurr, Sunstreaker and Nitro
    WANTED BOTS: G1: Horri-bull, Snarler, Mainframe, Chop Shop, Ransack CHUG: Spin Out, Cordon, Brotropolis Rescue MASTERPIECE: Acid Storm
    ENERGON: Six Shot

  5. #15
    Join Date
    16th Jul 2008


    The Europa 2017

    Ace Caller: Welcome everyone to the Europa 2017 cross country race! Today's race starts at Crown City and a sizeable crowd has gathered to witness the start of this iconic annual event. I'm Ace Caller and my co-commentator today is a fellow fleshbag Bill Fowler.
    Agent Fowler: That's special agent William Fowler to you and I'm actually here to ensure the safety of everyone from one particular convict today.
    Ace Caller: You're talking about the Decepticon Wildrider right?
    Agent Fowler: That's right. Wildrider is a menace who endangers the safety of everyone and I have been tasked with damage control and ensuring he goes back into federal custody after this... circus.
    Ace Caller: Well he's also helping raise the profile of this... circus. Attendance has been flagging each year. People are bored. They're even bored of Decepticons. That's why the race organisers have allowed a STUNTICON into this year's event. Also 4 out of 7 racers today are armed to the faceplate.
    Agent Fowler: Foolish if you ask me. The second amendment doesn't apply to robots in disguise and Stunticons belong on fours and behind steel beams.
    Ace Caller: Well steel beams or not it looks like the racers have completed their parade through the city and are pulling up to the start line.
    Agent Fowler: Whatever happened to good ol' fashioned racing? Why back home I have a sweet street supercar, my pride and joy...
    Ace Caller: Like that one there?
    Agent Fowler: Sweet lady liberty! That's my car!
    Ace Caller: That, I believe, is our guest racer Wildrider
    Agent Fowler: Why do these pieces of scrapmetal keep copying my vehicles?!?
    Ace Caller: A great question Agent Fowler, but one we'll have to come back to later. The racers are all in formation. It's lights out and away we go, the Europa 2017 is underway!

    LEG 1: Crown City
    Ace Caller: Hurricane is off to a boomer of a start! He takes the lead and blasts Blurr and Thermidor right in the hood with some terrible backfire! Thermidor is able to shake it off and retaliates on Hurricane with some gunfire but poor Blurr who also had a great start is blasted back into the rear of the field. In a comedy of errors Wildrider spins out at the start line causing harm to nobody and Nitro Convoy deploys belt tires slowing down an already slow start. Sunstreaker and Fracture are neck and neck, and remain completely unscathed by the drama. What an explosive start to the Europa 2017!
    Agent Fowler: Well looks like I should get my buttermilk popcorn afterall.
    Ace Caller: At the end of this leg it's Hurricane first, Thermidor second, Sunstreaker third, Blurr fourth with Wildrider and Nitro Convoy bring up the rear.
    Agent Fowler: You're missing a racer Ace
    Ace Caller: Oh right... sorry, it's Fracture second then Thermidor, Sunstreaker, Blurr, Wildrider and Nitro Convoy. How did I miss that?

    LEG 2: Chase Airfields
    Ace Caller: Now the racers enter the Chase Airfields which has been transformed into miles of pure high speed tarmac.
    Agent Fowler: I actually learned to fly here back in my Army Ranger days.
    Ace Caller: But I thought this was always a public airfield, not a military base?
    Agent Fowler: Did I say Army? I meant bla... er you know what, let's focus on the race. Er how about that Hurricane?
    Ace Caller: Hurricane continues to establish his lead while Wildrider continues to drive like a headcase in the rear. Blurr still seems disoriented from the blast he took in Leg 1 but wait... Nitro Convoy and Thermidor are on the warpath! They fire upon Sunstreaker and Fracture relentlessly until all four racers are neck and neck. Hurricane cops a ricochet off Nitro Convoy's beam but manages to keep the lead. Sunstreaker is not happy about other racers ruining his premium finish and pushes hard to regain his place.
    Agent Fowler: Hot damn! I'm surprised Sunstreaker and Fracture made it out of that alive. Why do we allow weapons in this race?
    Ace Caller: I think the real question is why a narcissist and a bounty hunter DIDN'T. Anyway at the end of this leg it's Hurricane at P1, Sunstreaker P2, Nitro Convoy, Thermidor and Fracture sharing P3, Blurr at P4 with Wildrider still in last place.

    LEG 3: Lake Bartels
    Agent Fowler: Ha, Lake Bartels, here's where things will get a bit curly. I once had to chase a rogue special ops officer through this territory. While it looks tranquil, it's pretty brutal terrtain.
    Ace Caller: Try explosive. Hurricane blasts away again this time hitting Fracture right in the crossbar and sending him back into the mix with Blurr, Nitro Convoy, Thermidor and Sunstreaker.
    Agent Fowler: We really have to get ourselves one of those. Sweet Christmas, I didn't think these windy roads could even fit 5 cars abreast.
    Ace Caller: Oh my! Now Nitro Convoy has deployed his cutters and is slicing and dicing his way through his fellow racers! Blurr and Sunstreaker back off however the cutters are failing to put a scratch on Thermidor's thick armour. Thermidor fires on Hurricane. Sunstreaker refuses to go down that easily and speeds ahead of the main group.
    Agent Fowler: I admire this guy's gumption. Reminds me of my younger self.
    Ace Caller: It's Hurricane first, Sunstreaker second, Nitro Convoy and Thermidor third, Blurr and Fracture fourth and Wildrider bringing up the rear.

    LEG 4: Continental Expressway
    Ace Caller: The race now moves onto the Continental Expressway. Hundreds of miles of infrastructure that spans multiple nations.
    Agent Fowler: Fun fact, the United States has actually sabotaged this road dozens of times in the last 50 years.
    Ace Caller: Er how is this a fun fact Agent Fowler?
    Agent Fowler: Mostly because dozens is just the number I'm allowed to quote publicly today.
    Ace Caller: Well hang onto that thought because Wildrider looks to have finally found the correct gear. He revs wildly and picks up a lot of speed, giving all the other racers something to worry about. Hurricane is spooked and doesn't hesitate to put some distance between him and Decepticon. He's so scared he fires away, hitting Sunstreaker right in the windshield.
    Agent Fowler: Ooh that's gonna hurt in the morning.
    Ace Caller: Thermidor is completely unperturbed and fires upon the race leader, reducing his lead.
    Agent Fowler: Look at Sunstreaker, this kid won't stay down.
    Ace Caller: After that battering Sunstreaker still steps up for more, overtaking Nitro Convoy and Thermidor to reclaim his place in the race order. It's Hurricane, Sunstreaker, Thermidor, Nitro Convoy, Blurr, Fracture and Wildrider.

    LEG 5: Galata Valley
    Ace Caller: As the racers descend into the Galata Valley we find Wildrider really stepping up, overtaking Fracture and giving the other racers something to worry about. Nitro Convoy deploys his cutters in defence but Wildrider falls just short of injury.
    Agent Fowler: I kind of like this Nitro Convoy's style. We should get our field vehicles fitted out to the same spec.
    Ace Caller: I woulda thought Thermidor's spec would be more up your alley?
    Agent Fowler: Naw, while the armour is tough for sure, those guns are way too weak. Look he's been firing continuously at Hurricane and is barely slowing him down. But look out, here comes Sunstreaker
    Ace Caller: Sunstreaker digs deep again and explodes into action. Powering through the midfield into equal first with Hurricane! This is unbelieveable. It's Sunstreaker and Hurricane first, Blurr and Thermidor second, Nitro Convoy and Fracture third and Wildrider is last place.
    Agent Fowler: I swear Fracture was in last place just before Ace.
    Ace Caller: He sure is difficult one to keep an eye on, especially with all the pandemonium.

    LEG 6: Carbomya Desert
    Agent Fowler: You know what Ace? In the desert, you can't remember your name.
    Ace Caller: Heat getting to you Fowler?
    Agent Fowler: It's more than the heat thats bothering me. Look Wildrider is at it again.
    Ace Caller: He sure is, he smashes into Nitro Convoy, however the Velocitronian has his deflector shields up and suffers no damage. The collision still throws off the other racers except Thermidor and Fracture who is too far behind to be bothered. Blurr shoots up from behind and is hot on the heels of the race leaders.
    Agent Fowler: We haven't talked about Blurr much, I have to say despite the battering he's been recieving each leg he's really having a solid race. A real dog soldier.
    Ace Caller: Speaking of soldiering Thermidor is not letting go of his grudge and is firing on Hurricane again!
    Agent Fowler: Now let's turn to Sunstreaker and see what he has in store. I love this kid.
    Ace Caller: He's digging deep once again and puts some power to the floor to increase his lead over Hurricane! It's Sunstreaker first, Hurricane second, Thermidor third, Blurr fourth, Nitro Convoy fifth with the rest tied for last place. I've never seen the competition for last so fierce!

    LEG 7: Coral Canyon
    Ace Caller: As we move from the harsh desert to the cool refreshing winds of the Coral Canyon we find that the competition is still hot!
    Agent Fowler: It's still anyone's race but my bets are on that Sunstreaker. The canyon is a treacherous place at any time of year and I think we're going to see some carnage.
    Ace Caller: You're not wrong Bill. Wildrider draws first blood again, derailing Nitro Convoy from the track!
    Agent Fowler: It's AGENT and that con is going to get someone killed.
    Ace Caller: Hurricane and Blurr power ahead, keen to not lose out to the yellow flash. Nitro Convoy deploys his belt tires and gets himself back on track. Thermidor shoots Hurricane down a peg.
    Agent Fowler: Now watch this Sunstreaker... he's pushing further ahead again. Theres no stopping this guy.
    Ace Caller: As we exit the canyon it's Sunstreaker first, Hurricane and Thermidor second, Blurr third, Fracture fourth, Nitro Convoy fifth and Wildrider in last place.

    LEG 8: Autobot City
    Ace Caller: It's the final leg, can Sunstreaker be beat?
    Agent Fowler: I don't think so Ace, he's got so much wood the other racers wouldn't even be able to SEE the forest.
    Ace Caller: Uh, okay... let's keep this PG Agent Fowler. Looks like the racers are safe from Wildrider who appears to have degenerated into doing donuts all over the Autobot City surface. Hurricane is having a good leg, but is by far not the best performer here. Blurr maxes out his engine and overtakes! Nitro Convoy plays defense again and deploys his cutters, however nobody is in range. Thermidor inches ahead of Hurricane and takes a shot at Blurr!
    Agent Fowler: Here comes the yellow streak! He's still got some juice to burn!
    Ace Caller: The racers hit the finish line it's Sunstreaker first by a whopping 5 seconds. Blurr second, Thermidor third, Hurricane fourth, Fracture fifth and Wildrider dead last.

    The results are:

    Summary of Results

    1st: Sunstreaker
    2nd: Blurr (+5)
    3rd: Thermidor (+5)
    4th: Hurricane (+6)
    5th: Fracture (+11)
    6th: Nitro Convoy (+14)
    6th: Wildrider (+16)

    Well thats it for the Europa 2017 folks! The payouts are as below:

    Congratulations to STL who is the only coy bidder to make a profit. Also condolences to UltraMarginal who missed out on a First4 by 1 racer. This race has been highly disappointing for seasoned racer Blurr who is still yet to win a Europa cup!

    Agent Fowler: Well looks like my job here is done.
    Ace Caller: Thanks Agent Fowler, despite your varying degrees of grump and Sunstreaker fanboyism you've actually been a fairly tolerable co-commentator.
    Agent Fowler: Well, despite my favourite racer winning I have to say this has a been a complete waste of federal funding and my time.
    Ace Caller: Well if that's how you feel I guess I won't tell you the bad news
    Agent Fowler: And what in the Sam hill is that?
    Ace Caller: That Fracture over there has helped Wildrider escape from custody.
    Agent Fowler: WHAT?!? All units we have a code S. I repeat a code S!

  6. #16
    Join Date
    28th Dec 2007


    Great race write up! Love Fowler and the nods to TF lore. Thanks heaps for running this each year. It's a delight on the calendar and I'm grateful you were a little late as I was out in the mountains when this going on without reception but did think of this.
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