G2 Prime: The Generation Wars

[Lint]

Dropkick: Run! It's the Prime!


G2 Prime: Fool! You should watch your own back ugly Decepticon!
Dropkick: Uff!!!


Dropkick: Please Prime! We have done nothing wrong!
G2 Prime: You, who are without beauty... now plead for it?
Dropkick: What? That doesn't even make sense!
G2 Prime: I thought you were made of... err... made of... bet... nicer...


G2 Prime: Ah screw it
Dropkick: UaaaRGH!@!#


G2 Prime: Though ugly in life, he had a beautiful end.


Kup: Prime you look like an idiot
G2 Prime: Hey who asked you anyway









Call it season 2 if you will, but G2 Prime is back! Bigger, Better and more Bloodthirstier than ever! Stay tuned for more adventures across the generations.

For those of you who missed out of Season 1 here's a link. This is probably not required viewing as character development is stunted, and backstories are wafer thin

[Hursticon]

Bloody Oath!

[Lint]

G2 Prime: We have killed many ugly decepticons old friend
Kup: You have killed many ugly decepticons. I'm not even entirely sure all of them were decepticons either.
G2 Prime: Nonetheless we are no closer to finding the source of the jamming signal.
Kup: Here's a nugget of wisdom for you Prime, if we keep killing everything we come across we will remain no closer to finding the source of the jamming signal.
G2 Prime: Well maybe if they stopped running, we could ask them.
Kup: Well maybe if yer stopped killing they'd stop running from you.
G2 Prime: THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE. THE DEAD CAN'T RUN GENIUS.
Kup: I wish I had enough articulation to facepalm*


Snarl: Guys guys! You won't believe what I found!


G2 Prime: Well if Trypticons could swim, it's me from the past stuck in a giant crystal! I suppose I should bust me out.


SMASH!!!!
G1 Prime: Ugh....
G2 Prime: Hah, it really is my dopey old self. Here take my hand.


G1 Prime: Thank you. Where am I, who are you?
G2 Prime: I am the better more improved you from the future where all is lost and everyone you know is either dead or crazy. This is Kup and Steeljaw.
Kup: Good to see yer, welcome to hell.
Snarl: Hi Mr Prime sir.
G1 Prime: This is... highly... irregular. I was fighting Megatron then all of a sudden. I found myself here.
G2 Prime: No kidding, so was I.
G1 Prime: Hmm, why are all communications jammed?
Kup: We're trying to figure that out so we can find the others. But stab-happy here can't keep his blade sheathed.


G1 Prime: We must stop the jamming signal and regroup with the other Autobots. We will need to stand together to face the perils that are to come.
G2 Prime:What you're taller than me? I hate you already
Kup: We're with you Prime.
G1 Prime: Kup I want you to do a perimeter check. Steeljaw I wan't you to scout ahead for any activity. Prime I need you to tow the supplies.
G2 Prime: Tow the whatnow?


G1 Prime: Autobots transform and roll out!
G2 Prime: Hang on a minute, ain't I the one in charge here?


With new leadership will the party finally be able to complete their quest? Will we see the original Optimus kick butt as per the above out-of-focus photo? Stay tuned for the next action packed episode of Transformers G2 Prime: The Generation Wars


*Although he cannot touch his face Generations Kup does indeed possess enough articulation to at least look like he's facepalming.

[Hursticon]

Hehehe Season 2 is looking to be excellent, Lint - Looking forward to Ep2!

[Lint]

We now continue Transformers G2 Prime: The Generation Wars


G2 Prime: ...And that's when we realised that the aliens were using our very own Cosmos against us. Poor guy, he was so lonely.


G1 Prime: And he sacrificed himself to save the humans?
G2 Prime: Oh Primus no, I got wikileaks to make up some crap about us holding a party in the sun. Naturally he picked up on the cable and ate that stuff up like it was happy hour at Maccadam's.
G1 Prime: You lied to him? Surely there was a better way.
G2 Prime: Never seen a bot zoom so eagerly into a giant burning ball of gas.


G2 Prime: Look me-from-the-past, I get that you are still in that noble phase and are always seeking the peaceful solution but there's a lot you still need to learn, nay... will have to learn in order to survive, I mean be a sword wielding hero like me!


Snarl: Yo Primes, I found somethings up ahead!
G1 Prime: Lead the way my little friend
Snarl: Little? I feel like my role in this show has been reduced to 'diminuitive scene-changer'


Major Tungsten: Skywarp! Skyhammer! Surround him and make sure he is fully restrained! Knockdown! Keep his weapon under guard. This one has escaped custody on multiple occasions.
Ironhide: Hmph...


G1 Prime: It's Ironhide! We must negotiate his freedom
Kup: This looks bad Prime, reminds me of the time I was down 5000 credits and a T-cog on Monacus.
G2 Prime: There will be no negotiating of any sort. We will wait on top of this hill then strike without mercy.
Kup: Just to clarify, I wasn't talking to you.


Ironhide: Heh, you creeps really think you can keep old Ironhide down? Looks like I need to teach you lot how to...


Ironhide: REAP THE WHIRLWIND!!!
Skywarp: Wha...?
Major Tungsten: You fools!


Major Tungsten: Stop him!


G2 Prime: Dang, looks like we can just lay here and enjoy the show
Kup: He's always been a brawler that Ironhide
G2 Prime: I know right?
Kup: Wasn't talking to you
G1 Prime: This is madness, the humans are our allies, surely we can resolve this misunderstanding through dialogue
G2 Prime: There will be no dialogue, sit your arse down before somebody spots you.


Major Tungsten: Stay right where you are you big metal freak.
Ironhide: My ol commander used to have a big sore spot fer your kind, however all I want to do now is teach you a SHORT, SHARP LESSON in...


Skywarp: SKY CANNON!
Ironhide: ARGHH!!!


Major Tungsten: You useless tape-balls, you almost got me killed! One more incident like that and I'll make sure your already miserable energon rations are cut in half!
Skywarp: Sorry boss
Skyhammer: Won't happen again, isn't that right Cali?
Caliburst: My crosshairs are trained on his noggin
Major Tungsten: Help this miserable pile of scrap up, we're moving off.


G2 Prime: Ah crepesticks, I was looking forward to a massacre.
Kup: Shall we step in Prime?
G2 Prime:......
Kup: Well shall we?
G2 Prime:......
Kup: *sigh* Shall we step in Stabbimus Prime?
G2 Prime: Ooooh so you are talking to me now
Kup: Only because you're the only one left around
Snarl: Hey!
G2 Prime: Wait, only one... where the hell is


G2 Prime: Ah crepes...

G1 Prime: Greetings, I am Optimus Prime. I have come to negotiate the release of the Autobot Ironhide.
Ironhide: Prahm? I haven't seen you in *cough* decacycles
G1 Prime: It is
Major Tungsten: So you are the great Optimus Prime eh? I am Major Tungsten of the United States Freedom Force. Skywarp this one looks valuable, shoot him in the back as well
G1 Prime: In ages past our kind were once allies. I see no reason why this could not be so again. Such hostilities are not necessary. My friend Ironhide means no harm.
Major Tungsten:Oh god, on second thought shoot him


G1 Prime: This has got to end. Kup.... your rifle
Kup: I know what you're planning and I will have no part in it
G1 Prime: Steeljaw, get me the rifle.



G1 Prime: I see that you have recruited former Decepticons into your ranks. I do not know what has transpired but I see this as a positive step towards reconciliation between not only our species but between Cybertronian kind as well.
Major Tungsten: Yes very well, will you come with me?
G1 Prime: I am happy to continue our discussions elsewhere. It would be a great honour for humankind to be the catalyst that sparks peaceful relations between Autobot and Decepticon...


Pew!
G1 Prime: What? No!
Skywarp & Skyhammer: !!!!!


Major Tungsten: Skyhammer you fool! What have you done!?!
Skyhammer: It wasn't me boss! It was.. it musta been Caliburst!
Caliburst: Hey!


G1 Prime: My... my future self was right. You're all monsters.... monsters that need to be sent to a party in the sun.


Kup: Yer happy now?
G2 Prime: ..........
Kup: Yer happy now Sniper Prime?
G2 Prime: I heard you the first time old friend, I was just reflecting on past experiences...


Ironhide: Urg... I'm not done yet Prahm!
Knockdown: Eep!
G1 Prime: Look out Ironhide!!!
Skyhammer: Not so fast Prime!


Ironhide: It ain't polite to shoot a bot in the back!
Skywarp: !!!!!


Ironhide: Get off my Prahm!
Skyhammer: Urk!


Ironhide: Urg, *cough* lucky last.
Major Tungsten: This is madness! No! Stay away from me!
G1 Prime: Ironhide, no! Don't do it.


Major Tungsten: Please! You're an Autobot. Have mercy! We can get you help. Energon! Anything!
Ironhide: Don't worry, this is gonna cause you a lot less pain than the world of hurt you've caused my kind.


The following scene is too graphic for public viewing. However the blood curdling sounds are perfectly ok.
Major Tungsten: Aiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!


G1 Prime: Ironhide..... Look what they've done to you. Worse still what they made you do to them.
*sizzle* *crack*
G1 Prime: Rest now old friend. You will be..... revenged


G1 Prime: RAAAAAAAAAAAARGGH!!!!!!!!


G2 Prime: He had to learn someday...
Kup: Come on Prime, our work is done here, lets go.
G2 Prime: Could it have been me at the other end of the scope all that time ago?


Knockdown: Should we go back to human's base?
Caliburst: No it's over...
Knockdown: What do we do now then?
Caliburst: We should report back to Megatron.

Did somebody say the M word? What a heavy ending! Find out if the mood changes in the next thrilling installment of Transformers G2 Prime: The Generation Wars

[UltraMarginal]

NICE, this is fun.

[kup]

For those of you who missed out of Season 1 here's a link. This is probably not required viewing as character development is stunted, and backstories are wafer thin

You are Shane McCarthy aren't you?

[Lint]

At the Decepticon camp...


Caliburst: Battletrap should be back by now
G2 Megs: The fool has probably gotten himself slagged. If it weren't for this dastardly interference we would be able to get a fix on his corpse and destroy that bladed buffoon once and for all!
Caliburst: What if I told you I could find Battletrap using special minicon tracking techniques?
G2 Megs: I'd call you a Scourge!


Ice Pick: Lord Megatron! Let Undertow and I seek and destroy the sworded Prime. We have superior mobility and firepower. He will not be able to resist our assault.


Sledge: Nonsense, the sworded Prime is a close combat specialist. What you really need is Smolder and I, who are best equipped to overwhelm our enemy in close quarters.


G2 Megs: While I salute your eagerness, you are all fools. The sworded Prime has but only one weakness aside from his brash overconfidence, short stature, stupidity and lack of firepower: ME! So come my minions, we will march on their position and make them DIE SCREAMING

Meanwhile...


Ratchet: So Huffer my boy, how do you feel?
Huffer: Thanks for getting me out of stasis lock Ratchet, the worst part of getting your head blown off is the pain


Huffer: The second worst part is that your second head is ginormously misproportioned and quintessonially ugly. Ugh...


Prowl: Who did this to you? I'm hunting for a killer. Likes to put holes in bot's head with high powered weaponry.
Huffer: Thankfully, or should I say; horrifically, all sensory data is simulatneously recorded in both my brains. So I can recall every excruciating detail about my brutal execution. Such a gift I have been endowed with.
Ratchet: Amazing biology! Does this mean you are smarter too?
Huffer: The very fact that I am bothering to humour you with a response should answer that question Doc.
Ratchet: Incredible, the Huffer I knew would never exhibit such sharp wit, I must document this in my medical journal...
Prowl: Enough banter, you mentioned that you remember everything. Tell me, who did this to you?
Huffer: Megatron
Prowl: Megatron is on this world? We Autobots are at a serious strategic disadvantage.
Huffer: The green one.
Prowl: Wait, what green one?
Huffer: Oh right... you're from the... okay, picture this. The silver-grey one but instead of turning into a pissy little gun, he is like 1000 times the size, rolls around on treads and screams "MEGATRON ATTACK!" at you
Ratchet: This sounds like the work of daaarrk energon!
Prowl: Everything is dark energon to you.
Huffer: I'll tell you what. Basically we're slagged if I don't go get help. Thus I must take my leave so that I might summon my brethren to battle. Verily.
Prowl: Very well Huffer.
Huffer: One more thing, I set up a rendezvous with Prime. The minicon there knows all the details.


Prowl: Prime is here too? Perhaps he can use the power of the matrix to help track down Ironhide's killer.


Snarl: Diiiiiid someone say 'track down' and 'Ironhide's killer' in the same sentence?
Prowl: You can find Prime?
Snarl: Prime and I used to be tight, plus I am a tracker and a super-sleuth. I reckon I can point you in the right direction

Some time later...



Prowl: Two Primes? I've got to lay off the juice.
Snarl: Prowl, meet Optimus Prime from the past and Optimus Prime from the not-as-past
G2 Prime: Steeljaw! I knew you'd make it! See Kup? Told ya he'd be back!
G1 Prime: Good to see you Prowl.
Prowl: I am investigating the death of Ironhide. Do any of you have any useful information?
Kup: Ah slag...
G2 Prime: Yeah we saw the body, what sort of information are you after?
Prowl: Information that will point me towards the killer. Someone's been switching bots offline and I want to put a stop to him.
G2 Prime: Could it have been the Decepticons at the scene?
Prowl: Doubtful, only the wound to his head was fatal and there was no weapons match from the bodies there. The killer definitely got away.


Prowl: Ratchet, what in the world are you doing?
Ratchet: Divining
Prowl: What?
Ratchet: You know... dowsing, doodlebugging
Prowl: I meant for what?
Ratchet: I am detecting a powerful energy signal, I suspect it is Daarrk Energon!
Prowl: Oh Vector Sigma...


Ratche: *whistling*
Prowl: Anyway back to the investigation
G1 Prime: I was there when it happened Prowl
Prowl: What did you see Prime?
G1 Prime: Shot in the head, by the cons.
Prowl: Did you see who did it?
G1 Prime: N-No... there was so much turmoil. So much killing... I killed as well. A Duocon.
Prowl: Wait what? There was no Duocon at the scene.
G1 Prime: Oh this was after, like much after.
Prowl: Vector Sigma...


G1 Prime: Worst part, it felt good Prowl
Prowl: Look Prime, I'm sure when Ratchet's done sifting through the dirt he'd be happy to counsel you through this difficult time.

Kup: I see what you did there. I'm onto you cat.
Snarl: All the TF's starting with P love me.
Kup: I'd watch your hide if I were you


Prowl: Great so despite being an eyewitness you don't really have any useful information at all do you?
G1 Prime: I am sorry Prowl
Prowl: I guess I will have to move on. Thank you all for your time.
G2 Prime: Welp, crisis averted! I'm gonna go see what Ratchet's up to.


Snarl: *whisper whisper whisper*
Prowl: Oh?


Prowl: Hold it right there Kup!
Kup: I wasn't going anywhere
Prowl: Then might I inquire?
Kup: Bout?
Prowl: Your rifle. It is not a standard issue Autobot weapon is it? It is... quite unique.
Kup: Slag...

G2 Prime: So you want me to dig here?
Ratchet: Yees, yes!


Kup: Here yer go...
Prowl: You see Kup, although a pacifist at heart, I am admittedly a bit of a military enthusiast as well with a penchant for exotic weaponry... Scrap, the minicon was right, this matches the ballistics 100% But Kup wouldn't...

G2 Prime: This sword was meant to cut through metal not shovel dirt.
Ratchet: Keep going, I can feel it!

Kup: Is something the matter Prowl?


Prowl: Nothing's the matter. This is a fine piece Kup, here you go

G2 Prime: Hah! I found it. Go me!
Ratchet: Don't touch it, you could get contaminated! You must allow me to examine it first
G2 Prime: No way slack-hands, I did all the digging! This thing is mine!

Kup: Uhh do you hear something?


Prowl: Scrap they're coming right for us.
Kup: You're gonna be glad you handed me back this rifle kid.
Prowl: I checked your ammo Kup, you only have 2 shots left. It might be enough for us a break an escape, provided we all work together as a cohesive unit.

Ratchet: Hand it over Prime! For science!
G2 Prime: Screw your science! It's my precious!
Ratchet: No! You don't understand Prime we need it to rebuild the Omega Lock and restore Cybertron!!!

Prowl: ......
Kup: ......
Kup: Or we could just use those 2 shots to take ourselves offline.

[Lint]

G2 Megs: Decepticons! Attack!!!!
Sledge: Cmon Throttler, let's bury these bots
Ice Pick: Not before Chainclaw and I snow them under an avalanche of missiles
Undertow: You do realise you're a snow plow right Ice Pick? Anyway Waterlog and I are gonna make it RAIN on these mofos
Smolder: Oh please guys, these alt-mode related puns are just burning Chopster up here.


Prowl: We're under attack! Take cover and repel the assault!
Kup: What cover?!?
G1 Prime: I will provide covering fire, ready the shuttle for launch!
Kup: What shuttle?!? Am I the only damned bot with my transistors intact?
Ratchet: HAHAHAHA forget covering fire, let them come and taste some surgical steel!
Kup: Why did I have to ask...


ZAPP!!!
G2 Prime: Ratchet no!!!


POW! PPOW!
G2 Prime: No!!!!


Prowl: *croak*
G2 Prime: Oh Primus, it's like 1986 all over again!


G2 Prime: I'm a Prime, get me outta here!
Snarl: Wait for meeeeee
Kup: Where's that damn fool going?!


Snarl: So long, Sucktown!
Kup: Unbelieveable! You're just gonna leave Prowl and Ratchet here to die?
G1 Prime: Go Kup, I'll stay here and protect the bodies
Kup: I don't need two fool Primes, we've lost this battle. Transform and retreat.


Some time later....


Kup: What the hell was that Prime?
G2 Prime: I don't wanna talk about it
Snarl: Man Kup looks like a way sweeter ride.


Kup: I know you Prime, you're one ruthless mother trucker. It's not like you to just hightail it out of a fight. Especially one with Megatron on the other side. Tell us what the heck has got you spooked.
G2 Prime: I don't have to tell you anything! YOU'RE NOT MY DAD!!!
Snarl: Ha hahh, I made it!


SCREEECH!!!!
Kup: I've had enough of this stuff. Tell us whats going on before Prime and I blow your spark into the wind.
G1 Prime: I've always wanted to know what it feels like to kill myself
Kup: o_O

Back at the battleground....



G2 Megs: Muhahahaha, look at how the cowardly Autobots scatter
Sledge: You want Throttler here to punch a hole through this one o mighty Megatron?
G2 Megs: Not so fast, revive him, we could use a medic as our slave.


Smolder: What about this one boss? Chopster and I would love to cleave him into microwaveable pieces.
G2 Megs: By all means, go IDW Arcee on him

Back at the Prime camp...


G2 Prime: Look guys, I have something to confess... I'm not the brilliant leader and hero everyone thinks I am
Kup: Wow, no stuff


G2 Prime: Every time I go up against that Megatron, I lose one of my team.
Kup: I counted two today buster...
G2 Prime: I... I can't beat him. No matter how brave I am, how fiercely I fight, somebody dies. I am not worthy.


G1 Prime: Nor was I once. I was but a weak simpleton when the first Megatron murdered my lover and my friend. However despite these losses I was able to persevere and become leader of the Autobots.
G2 Prime: Err, you do realise we are the same bot right? Besides which I KICKED YOUR MEGATRON'S ARSE at the Battle for Autobot City.


Kup: Thats true, I was there kid. You put up a damned good fight.
G2 Prime: Thanks Kup
Kup: Although I do also recall you getting shot to pieces.
G2 Prime: Thanks Kup
Kup: Look Prime, nobody hates you more than I do. Probably not even Megatron. But after travelling with you for this long, I believe in you and your ability to tear Decepticons apart with your mighty, mighty sword.
G1 Prime: Yes, that much is true.
G2 Prime: Wait... are you guys trying to cheer me up?


Snarl: You can do it Prime! You're the best!
G2 Prime: Oh gawd, this is getting way too mushy. I can't take this level of sympathy anymore


G2 Prime: It's time to take the fight back to Megatron! I'd much rather have all my friends die than have to sit through anymore slides of that inspirational drivel.
G1 Prime: That's the spirit!
Kup: Good to have yer back dorkhead
Snarl: I like turtles.
Kup: Get out of my face

Back at Megatron's....


G2 Megs: You work for ME now
Ratchet: Not if your life sonny jim
G2 Megs: I had a feeling you would say that, so how about this...


G2 Megs: As you can see my minions Smolder and Chopster have done quite a number on your friend there...
Ratchet: Prowl... no
G2 Megs...so lets make an agreement. I am in need of a skilled physician, you would like your friend's remains. Every gigacycle you are in my service, I will give you a part of your friend to put back together. Serve me well, and you well have your friend fully restored and I will grant you both that 'freedom' you Autobots crave so badly.
Ratchet: And if I refuse?
Smolder: Heh, I get to show you a thing or two about superheated steel
Ratchet: What? That it's really soft and workable?
G2 Megs: How about how it feels when your head is entirely composed of it?
Ratchet: *gulp*


Will Kup and his newly reformed team of Primes be able to Rescue Ratchet from the clutches of G2 Megatron? Find out on the next thrilling 30 slides of Transformers G2 Prime: The Generation Wars!

[GoktimusPrime]

Daarrk Energon! lol